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  • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post
    What about this one? Of course someone would have to remove the gun. Don’t want bullets going off in that there barbecue.

    Red bandana, gang affiliation?

    Comment


    • NOLA2005
      NOLA2005 commented
      Editing a comment
      Yes, a bad cricket vs a wholesome cricket. One that, with a little bbq sauce, was delicious.
      Last edited by NOLA2005; 08-04-2019, 12:27 AM.

  • Originally posted by BTDT2 View Post

    Red bandana, gang affiliation?

    This reminds me of an incident a few years back...and the commentary by a fellow officer that made me go WTF?!

    We were assisting an elderly lady in locating her dog that had gotten out of the yard. She said his name was Benji and she described him as a small brown and white terrier mix wearing a blue bandana. We were driving around the neighborhood for a while with no sign of Benji. When I got to the highway I noticed SOMETHING in the road. Whatever it was, it obviously had been run over by multiple vehicles and was completely flattened. I was thinking/hoping "that CAN'T be the dog." There was fur, but I couldn't tell what kind of animal it was -- and then I noticed the bandana. It was no longer blue, but soaked in blood. When the other officer arrived he took a look at the mess and commented: "Benji lived as a Crip and died as a Blood".

    Comment


    • NOLA2005
      NOLA2005 commented
      Editing a comment
      Oh that poor lady, losing her fur baby like that.

    • not.in.MY.town
      not.in.MY.town commented
      Editing a comment
      NOLA2005 Yes, it was heart-wrenching. When I made the notification she asked me to take her to the body so she could hold Benji one more time and say goodbye. I didn't have the heart to tell her that there was nothing left to hold. All I could do was bring her his nametag (after cleaning it) and tell her to remember him healthy and happy. This is one of those calls that's stuck with me for a long time...and of course there's the comedic relief provided by the other officer.

  • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post
    Anyone have a good recipe for grasshopper fricassee? WTF!!??



    How many do you plan to feed?

    Comment


    • not.in.MY.town
      not.in.MY.town commented
      Editing a comment
      What The Fricassee?!

    • NOLA2005
      NOLA2005 commented
      Editing a comment
      By the look of those meaty fellows, a lot!
      Last edited by NOLA2005; 08-04-2019, 08:27 PM. Reason: Fricking grasshoppers again!

    • NOLA2005
      NOLA2005 commented
      Editing a comment
      You should do more Photoshop, you really are the king of Photoshop.

  • Originally posted by not.in.MY.town View Post

    How do you Fricassee?
    .




    My best guess........

    Comment


    • NOLA2005
      NOLA2005 commented
      Editing a comment
      I'm pretty sure that's not how it's done. But it's a good way to get a crease in ones forehead.
      Last edited by NOLA2005; 08-18-2019, 12:38 AM. Reason: Who knows anymore....

  • People that drive with their fog lights on when it's not foggy (especially in broad daylight) make me go "WTF?".

    The visibility is completely clear- is their vision foggy?

    Comment


    • Well the grasshoppers are gone. In their place are a large number of fat black birds that can hardly fly with their overstuffed bellies. There is white bird crap all over the place with little grasshopper legs sticking out.
      Last edited by NOLA2005; 08-18-2019, 12:26 AM.
      "No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."

      Comment


      • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post
        Well the grasshoppers are gone. In their place are a large number of fat black birds that can hardly fly with their overstuffed bellies. There is white bird crap all over the place with little grasshopper legs sticking out.
        My neighborhood has a large number of crows, reminiscent of a scene from Alfred Hitchcock’s 1963 film “The Birds”.
        “CC” or crow crap is a way of life on my street. One needs an umbrella just to walk to your curbside mailbox or car parked in your driveway.

        As you know birds, unlike mammals, don’t produce urine. Instead, they excrete nitrogenous wastes in the form of uric acid, which emerges as a white paste. Uric acid doesn’t dissolve in water easily, so it sticks to your car, hat or police uniform (a long story that can only shared offline) like blobs of white plaster.

        I read birds do have a color preference when it comes to targeting their dropping, red cars are the most likely target of bird poop, followed by blue and black. With this in mind I recently bought an white pearl SUV.

        Last week I took my grandchildren for an end of summer dinner at a popular bay area Mexican restaurant. The Bay area is notorious for auto theft and car clouts. Seated near a window and watching my SUV during dinner I observed a middle aged homeless woman dressed in a raggedy housecoat sluggishly pushing a shopping cart overflowing with her possessions / recyclable bottles and aluminum cans.

        She stopped alongside my SUV peering into windows and trying door handles. Fearing a car clout was imminent I briefly I activated my alarm, she Immediately backed away from my vehicle, looked towards the restaurant…. raised her housecoat exposing a naked bottom, squatted and took a dump. Reaching into her cart for a paper handbill, scooped up her crap and plunged it onto my white pearl hood. Glaring toward the restaurant window she flipped the bird and slowly left with her shopping cart.

        Among California's homeless corn is an especially common culprit for undigested food in stool.

        And that’s my WTF for this week.






        `









        `

        Comment


        • NOLA2005
          NOLA2005 commented
          Editing a comment
          Good grief! Not only do you need an umbrella to stop crow poop deposits while getting the mail, but one for your car to stop homeless poop deposits too. WTF!?

          Sooo, did you have to acid wash your hood?

      • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post
        Sooo, did you have to acid wash your hood?:

        Since I was 5 years old I always wanted to drive a “Black and White” never pictured myself driving a “Brown and White”.

        No acid wash, I made a grave mistake by driving through a fully automated, a self-service touchless car wash, don’t ask….





        Comment


        • NOLA2005
          NOLA2005 commented
          Editing a comment
          LMAO!!! Instead of a pearl white suv, you got a code brown suv, courtesy of a corn eating homeless lady.

      • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post
        LMAO!!! Instead of a pearl white suv, you got a code brown suv, courtesy of a corn eating homeless lady.
        :

        35 years of driving code 3, never thought once I retired I’d find myself driving code brown.

        A serious medical question……I accidently exposed myself three times during X-rays. I was embarrassed and apologized. Yet the radiologic technologists chastised me after the second and third time, I felt she was somewhat unprofessional. My question, beside X-rays is there another way to diagnose arthritis of the thumb?



        Comment


        • Originally posted by BTDT2 View Post


          35 years of driving code 3, never thought once I retired I’d find myself driving code brown.

          A serious medical question……I accidently exposed myself three times during X-rays. I was embarrassed and apologized. Yet the radiologic technologists chastised me after the second and third time, I felt she was somewhat unprofessional. My question, beside X-rays is there another way to diagnose arthritis of the thumb?


          An xray is an excellent way to diagnose arthritis of any joint. If you want to stay on your technologist good side, always wear underwear that keeps everything contained. Otherwise you'll wonder why the xray exposure is going on forever, why is there a tingling in your nether regions (not the good kind) and what the heck is that burning smell.​​​​




          (jk)
          "No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."

          Comment


          • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post

            An xray is an excellent way to diagnose arthritis of any joint. If you want to stay on your technologist good side, always wear underwear that keeps everything contained. Otherwise you'll wonder why the xray exposure is going on forever, why is there a tingling in your nether regions (not the good kind) and what the heck is that burning smell.​​​​


            (jk)
            OK I get it, underwear for an X Ray, what about a MRI, CAT, Ultrasound or Fluoroscopy?

            Comment


            • Originally posted by BTDT2 View Post

              OK I get it, underwear for an X Ray, what about a MRI, CAT, Ultrasound or Fluoroscopy?

              Yes to all of those unless told otherwise. Also do as your mother taught you, wear clean underwear, no skid marks please!






              I don't know why I googled skid marks images, now I'm so look sorry I did, I mean WHF was I thinking?!
              "No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."

              Comment


              • Originally posted by NOLA2005 View Post


                Yes to all of those unless told otherwise. Also do as your mother taught you, wear clean underwear, no skid marks please!

                I don't know why I googled skid marks images, now I'm so look sorry I did, I mean WHF was I thinking?!
                Yes, as a child I was told wear clean underwear in case I was in an accident. But what if an accident caused my dirty underwear?

                I'm having a rotator cuff MRI this week, is underwear required for this procedure? Does it really matter if I tie my hospital gown in the front? .



                Comment


                • Originally posted by BTDT2 View Post

                  Yes, as a child I was told wear clean underwear in case I was in an accident. But what if an accident caused my dirty underwear?

                  I'm having a rotator cuff MRI this week, is underwear required for this procedure? Does it really matter if I tie my hospital gown in the front? .


                  MRI techs are a different breed. They won’t mind if you go commando with you gown open in the front. If when walking into the MRI suite you encounter a breeze and things get to flapping, well that’s just an added bonus to them.
                  "No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."

                  Comment


                  • BTDT2
                    BTDT2 commented
                    Editing a comment
                    I certainly hope so, it’s demeaning to be called “tripod” and the family jewels called “junk”.

                • Nola

                  We told Townie Soprano how to Fricassee and now he’s gone. I assume he rather Fricassee in NJ instead in tricycle in SF.



                  Comment


                  • NOLA2005
                    NOLA2005 commented
                    Editing a comment
                    Well it is kinda warm to be nude tricycling unless one has special air cool seating, wouldn't want to end up with a fricasseed bottom.
                    Last edited by NOLA2005; 08-19-2019, 09:20 PM. Reason: Just because summers almost over....

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