Chili Cookoff

[hellhound130]

Ok with fall around the corner, I know that I make chili. But I am thinking of changing it, making it spicy so anyone have any suggestions or would like to share their recipe

[VDCavey]

Good idea...Belgians dont know **** about Chili, and being away from the US Embassy two years its been that long since I had a decent Chili....

[hellhound130]

well for my chili i use a crockpot,
1 lb of hamburger
1 small can of tomato paste
2 14oz can of tomatos
2 14oz can of tomato sauce
2 14oz can of dark kidney beans
1 can of tomato soup
1 whole onion for flavoring (dont cut up if you dont like onions)
parlsely, 2 garlic cloves, chili powder, etc.
Then i let i cook all day on low
I sometimes add green peppers to it,

[1042 Trooper]

well for my chili i use a crockpot,
1 lb of hamburger
1 small can of tomato paste
2 14oz can of tomatos
2 14oz can of tomato sauce
2 14oz can of dark kidney beans
1 can of tomato soup
1 whole onion for flavoring (dont cut up if you dont like onions)
parlsely, 2 garlic cloves, chili powder, etc.
Then i let i cook all day on low
I sometimes add green peppers to it,

Oh no, my boy, here's the real thing. Award-winning, eyes watering, nose running, forehead sweating, all-american bowl of red....

First, no beans. Never put bean in chili, Then...

Grill or broil up up one huge round steak. Cut into small chunks.
Fry up 2 pounds of course ground chuck. Gotta be chuck
Fry up 2 pounds of spicy pork sausage - chorizo if you got it
One yellow onion chopped
One bell pepper, chopped
One Bay Leaf, whole
1/2 tsp cumin
2 tblsp chili powder
2 large cans chopped tomatoes
1/2 cup long sliced jalepeno peppers
2 cloves of garlic, smashed
2 beef boulion cubes
1/4 cup Topatillo or Louisiana Hot Sauce
One of the tomato cans full of water

All day in a large crock or pot - 8 hours on low.

Grab a fire extinguisher, and GET SOME!

[ejay]

First, no beans. Never put bean in chili

SACRILEGE

[hellhound130]

Oh no, my boy, here's the real thing. Award-winning, eyes watering, nose running, forehead sweating, all-american bowl of red....

First, no beans. Never put bean in chili, Then...

Grill or broil up up one huge round steak. Cut into small chunks.
Fry up 2 pounds of course ground chuck. Gotta be chuck
Fry up 2 pounds of spicy pork sausage - chorizo if you got it
One yellow onion chopped
One bell pepper, chopped
One Bay Leaf, whole
1/2 tsp cumin
2 tblsp chili powder
2 large cans chopped tomatoes
1/2 cup long sliced jalepeno peppers
2 cloves of garlic, smashed
2 beef boulion cubes
1/4 cup Topatillo or Louisiana Hot Sauce
One of the tomato cans full of water

All day in a large crock or pot - 8 hours on low.

Grab a fire extinguisher, and GET SOME!

YEAP I will need a fire extinguisher on that one, not my taste (dont like hot stuff) but i will make it for my husband he likes it hot!!!

[Wile E. Coyote]

Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted.

Here are the scorecards from the event:

Chili # 1 Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth, tomato flavor. Very mild
Judge # 3 -- Holy ****, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

Chili # 2 Arthur's Afterburner Chili
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

Chili # 3 Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A bean less chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting ****-faced from all of the beer.

Chili # 4 Bubba's Black Magic
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-LB. barmaid is starting to look HOT-just like this nuclear waste I'm eating. Is chili an aphrodisiac?

Chili # 5 Linda's Legal Lip Remover
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ****es me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks.

Chili # 6 Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I **** myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my *** with a snow cone.

Chili # 7 Susan's screaming Sensation Chili
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment I should take note that I am worried about Judge# 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water My shirt is covered with chili, which slides unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava like **** to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, its too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

Chili #8 Tommy's Toenail Curling Chili
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balance chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor dude, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili.

[WC145]

ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[jricks]

Trooper, that's not Chili, that's steak soup. You never ever put PASTA in chili.

[hellhound130]

I would have to agree with jricks pasta in chili sounds like a stew

[1042 Trooper]

Trooper, that's not Chili, that's steak soup. You never ever put PASTA in chili.

Where do you see any referrence to PASTA in my chili??? YUK! SOUNDS GROSS!

[jricks]

I was just refuting never putting beans in chili, that makes it chili....not implying that you put pasta in the chili you posted.

Pasta (either spagetti or maccaroni) is put in chili in Cincinnatti OH, commonly referred to as Cincinnatti Chili. All those damm yankees swear by it. It is gross. Since chili is always better on the second day, the pasta ruins it by soaking up the what little liquid should be in the chili and ruins it.

[1042 Trooper]

I was just refuting never putting beans in chili, that makes it chili....not implying that you put pasta in the chili you posted.

Pasta (either spagetti or maccaroni) is put in chili in Cincinnatti OH, commonly referred to as Cincinnatti Chili. All those damm yankees swear by it. It is gross. Since chili is always better on the second day, the pasta ruins it by soaking up the what little liquid should be in the chili and ruins it.

Gotta disagree on the beans - no self-respecting, competative chili cook EVER outs beans in chili. They won't even let you enter a cook-off anywhere I'm familiar with, if you use beans.

They do stretch it out so you you can feed more folks and, I love the taste of kidney beans, but when it's competition time, beans will get you tossed out the back gate!

But PASTA? I guess that would be a chili -mack deal. Good for filling up kids, I suppose.

[Mitchell_in_CT]

Dam bunch of chilli bigots...

[hellhound130]

sounds like someone is jealous they dont have a chili recipe