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Man has had sex with over 700 cars

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  • Man has had sex with over 700 cars

    Some people love cars. Some people REALLY love cars.

    http://metro.co.uk/2014/10/14/this-m...ectly-4905491/

    It’s one thing to be fond of your car. It’s another thing to be so attached to it that you actually – wait for it – want to be intimate with it.


    In this man’s case, however, he loves cars so much that he actually takes his passion to the next level, and – no we promise we’re not making this up – has sex with them.

    Edward Smith revealed his unusual tastes on This Morning on Tuesday, telling Philip Schofield and Amanda Holden that he has done the deed with over 700 cars during his life.

    And as the pair struggled to keep a straight face, he admitted his interest in cars began as a child, leading to him ‘losing his virginity’ to a Volkswagen Beetle when he was a teenager.

    ‘I got tempted one night to just step outside and gently caress a car,’ he admitted, ‘and it did something for me, it woke something up inside me.’
    He explained, ‘It has to do with the body itself, I have not really been attracted to any kind of penetration.’

    Well phew, that’s a relief. So how does one ‘have sex’ with a car exactly? Edward explained that for him it involves ‘hugging and holding the shape of the car close to me and actually talking to it a little bit. And of course the rest is physical satisfaction.’

  • #2


    The story failed to mention the VW Beetle was wearing a Car Bra.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by JasperST View Post
      Some people love cars. Some people REALLY love cars.

      http://metro.co.uk/2014/10/14/this-m...ectly-4905491/

      ‘It has to do with the body itself, I have not really been attracted to any kind of penetration.’

      Well phew, that’s a relief.
      It sure is. It saves me from duct taping my cars' tailpipes.
      I’ll die with blue in my veins.

      Comment


      • #4
        I've never had a guy get "it" stuck in a tailpipe. But this doesn't surprise me at all.
        Some people are just weird/sick.

        Originally posted by JasperST
        "The fail is strong with this one."


        Originally posted by mdrep
        It's not sporting old chap. Like shooting fish in a barrel. You may only take a shot at a poser or troll if they are running and you are properly licensed.

        What do you think we are, a bunch of barbarians?

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Trauma1 View Post
          I've never had a guy get "it" stuck in a tailpipe. But this doesn't surprise me at all.
          Some people are just weird/sick.

          You ever had one get "it" stuck in a zipper???????????? I got that call one night
          Since some people need to be told by notes in crayon .......Don't PM me with without prior permission. If you can't discuss the situation in the open forum ----it must not be that important

          My new word for the day is FOCUS, when someone irritates you tell them to FOCUS

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Trauma1 View Post
            I've never had a guy get "it" stuck in a tailpipe. But this doesn't surprise me at all.
            Some people are just weird/sick.



            Trauma

            Relationships of this nature are common in the bay area.

            Comment


            • #7
              You know how some people have a backside the size of a bus? Not only is that a fetish for some, he takes it to the next level and actually bones a bus.
              I yell "PIKACHU" before I tase someone.

              Comment


              • #8
                So would there be a charge if he raped your car?

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Iowa #1603 View Post
                  You ever had one get "it" stuck in a zipper???????????? I got that call one night
                  One of my worst fears as a patrol Sergeant was having an Officer frantically call a “Code Z” over the air.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Iowa #1603 View Post
                    You ever had one get "it" stuck in a zipper???????????? I got that call one night
                    That's an easy one to remedy....distract with, hey guy...see this? YANK.

                    Honestly, people call the police and 911 with the craziest of stuff.....and show up in the ER with the insane. But it keeps my job interesting. And I've mastered the straight face thing pretty good.....usually.
                    Originally posted by JasperST
                    "The fail is strong with this one."


                    Originally posted by mdrep
                    It's not sporting old chap. Like shooting fish in a barrel. You may only take a shot at a poser or troll if they are running and you are properly licensed.

                    What do you think we are, a bunch of barbarians?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Here's you stud.

                      Going too far is half the pleasure of not getting anywhere

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Trauma1 View Post
                        That's an easy one to remedy....distract with, hey guy...see this? YANK.

                        Honestly, people call the police and 911 with the craziest of stuff.....and show up in the ER with the insane. But it keeps my job interesting. And I've mastered the straight face thing pretty good.....usually.
                        Having worked vice, sex crimes and fraternizing at several ER's in my area, I realized a “fanny pack” in California has special meaning. Tell me how ER personnel keep a straight face when retrieving a “shot glass”?
                        Last edited by sanitizer; 10-16-2014, 10:08 PM.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Allllllllllll Righty then!
                          SUPPORT COP RUN BUSINESSES!!
                          SUPPORT LEO BUSINESSES!



                          In 2017, the sales of my LEO related decals allowed me to donate over $350. to LE/ Military related charities... THANK YOU!!! Check them out HERE...

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Does he consider Autozone a sex toy store?
                            I yell "PIKACHU" before I tase someone.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I hope it shows up on the CarFax report. I think people need to know their car is a pros or no longer a virgin.
                              I am actually surprised that Chairman O has not hired this guy as a consumer activist.
                              September 11, 2001 - All gave some, some gave all. Never forget -- Never forgive.......... RIP Brothers and Sisters.

                              Comment

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