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English woman bites off boyfriend's "boys" during a drunken fight

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  • English woman bites off boyfriend's "boys" during a drunken fight

    I think they also call them "tabs" there, too...

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    English woman Maria Topp facing jail term after biting off boyfriend's testicles
    By Newscore
    From: news.com.au
    October 26, 2011
    1:25PM

    Woman pleads guilty to grievous bodily harm. Bit boyfriend's testicles off during drunken brawl.

    A woman is facing jail after admitting to biting off her boyfriend's testicles during a drunken brawl.
    Maria Topp, a mother-of-four from Gateshead, England, pleaded guilty to grievous bodily harm at Newcastle Crown Court over the fight with Martin Douglas, her partner of five years, the Evening Chronicle reported.

    Douglas, 45, was taken to the hospital for emergency surgery to reattach his genitals after Topp bit them off during the incident in February this year. He was so traumatised by his wounds, which required 19 stitches, that emergency services struggled to understand him when he called for help.
    Topp, who remembers the fight but cannot remember biting her partner, was arrested soon after paramedics arrived at Douglas' flat in Newcastle and called the police. Recorder Robin Mairs said the pair had a tempestuous relationship and had both been drunk at the time of the incident.
    The 44-year-old woman was warned her actions would more than likely result in a jail term.

    "There is an argument, a brawl begins during which Mrs. Topp admits she unlawfully bit the complainant's scrotum," the judge said. Topp was granted bailed and warned she could face jail. She will appear for sentencing on November 11.
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    And now, several women observing their male counterparts, seated at the PC, are wondering why they're grimacing in pain and crossing their legs.
    "You're never fully dressed without a smile."

    Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.

    Three things I know for sure: (1) No bad deed goes unrewarded, (2) No good deed goes unpunished, and (3) It is entirely possible to push the most devoted, loyal and caring person beyond the point where they no longer give a 5h!t.

  • #2
    Originally posted by Kieth M. View Post
    I think they also call them "tabs" there, too...

    As in, "Tab A in Slot B?"
    If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

    ---Jack Handey

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    • #3
      I'm thinking the word tempestuous to describe their relationship.... is an understatement..
      I'm not small, I'm fun sized....

      You're the reason I have Pistanthrophobia.

      Where's my EFF You Font on my computer?

      Скажите мне другая история...

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Kieth M. View Post
        "There is an argument, a brawl begins during which Mrs. Topp admits she unlawfully bit the complainant's scrotum," the judge said.
        Unlawfully bit? Compared to lawfully biting off ones scrotum?

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Kieth M. View Post
          And now, several women observing their male counterparts, seated at the PC, are wondering why they're grimacing in pain and crossing their legs.
          It's not just you men recoiling and slamming your legs shut!! Yikes!!

          Although, from a logistic point, how? I'm skeptical this was in the heat of a fight as opposed to her cruelly seeking revenge when he thought she was, er, um, apologizing.

          Even blind sloppy drunk, wouldn't he at least squeeze his legs shut in instinctive self-defense, throw a knee,something? with her bared teeth coming that close to the boys if they were still fighting, especially a physical altercation with an angry woman known to be volatile?

          Either he was passed out cold, or she tricked him.
          "Snort-laughter is the best medicine"
          ----- Mussel Bound


          Don't forget to laugh today. The more implausible it seems, the more you need to.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by MargeGunderson View Post
            It's not just you men recoiling and slamming your legs shut!! Yikes!!

            Although, from a logistic point, how? I'm skeptical this was in the heat of a fight as opposed to her cruelly seeking revenge when he thought she was, er, um, apologizing.

            Even blind sloppy drunk, wouldn't he at least squeeze his legs shut in instinctive self-defense, throw a knee,something? with her bared teeth coming that close to the boys if they were still fighting, especially a physical altercation with an angry woman known to be volatile?

            Either he was passed out cold, or she tricked him.
            LOL, that's what I was thinkin' too....

            Comment


            • #7
              Oh those darn ball bust'n British women are at it again!
              Getting shot hurts. Don't under estimate the power of live ammo. A .22LR can kill you. My personal thoughts is to avoid being shot by any caliber.

              Comment

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