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You might be a redneck if....

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  • You might be a redneck if....

    Another curoius thread brought to you by az4code23

    You think "loading the dishwasher" means getting your wife drunk.
    You ever cut your grass and found a car.
    You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren't.
    You think the stock market has a fence around it.
    Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater.
    Your boat has not left the drive-way in 15 years.
    You own a homemade fur coat.
    you own more than 3 shirts with cut off sleeves.
    You burn your yard rather than mow it.
    Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath."
    You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.
    The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
    You've ever raked leaves in your kitchen.
    Birds are attracted to your beard.
    Your wife's job requires her to wear an orange vest.
    You were shooting pool when any of your kids were born.
    You have the local taxidermist's number on speed dial.
    You've ever hit a deer with your car...deliberately.
    You've ever stolen toilet paper.
    you have a rag for a gas cap
    You've ever given rat traps as gifts.
    You take a fishing pole into Sea World.
    You clean your fingernails with a stick.
    Your CB antenna is a danger to low-flying planes.
    You keep a can of RAID on the kitchen table.
    Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
    Your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
    Every socket in your house breaks a fire code.
    You've totaled every car you've ever owned.
    There are more than five McDonald's bags in your car.
    Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
    Last edited by az4code23; 09-26-2009, 08:35 PM.
    "Abandon your animosities and make your sons Americans." - Robert E. Lee, 1865

  • #2
    If your idea of going to town is your local Walmart
    If you have a bathtub in your front yard as a planter
    If your motto is if Walmart don't sell it I don't need it
    If you still have a mullet haircut
    If a family member calls you over to look in the toilet before they flush it.
    If you've ever lost your teeth

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    • #3
      If you ever stared at a can of OJ because it said "concentrate"
      “The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed."

      "You go for a man hard enough and fast enough, he don't have time to think about how many's with him; he thinks about himself, and how he might get clear of that wrath that's about to set down on him."

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      • #4
        If you think hitting a dear at 60 miles an hour is fast food......

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        • #5
          Dam, I'm a redneck.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by mikeymedic View Post
            Dam, I'm a redneck.
            Yeah, me too....but my CB antenna is only 4' tall.....
            sigpic
            Originally posted by Smurfette
            Lord have mercy. You're about as slick as the business side of duct tape.
            Originally posted by DAL
            You are without doubt a void surrounded by a sphincter muscle.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by FJDave View Post
              Yeah, me too....but my CB antenna is only 4' tall.....
              LOL....
              "Abandon your animosities and make your sons Americans." - Robert E. Lee, 1865

              Comment

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