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WHAT A MORON! They should've named this idiot in the article!
Rescue Team Uses Saw to Free Trapped Penis
Sparks fly when a trapped penis is freed from a dumbell ring.
By JONATHAN LLOYD
Updated 2:20 PM CDT, Fri, Sep 25, 2009
It's unlikely anybody on the Costa Mesa Fire Department's Urban Search and Rescue team signed up for this.
The highly trained team usually responds to calls involving people trapped in structures and vehicles. On Tuesday, squad members responded to a trapped penis.
In an ill-conceived attempt to increase the size of his member, a man placed his penis through the "hole of a steel, ring-shaped dumbbell weight fastener," according to the Daily Pilot. The fasteners are used to secure weight plates on dumbbell bars.
"They said his comment was, 'This will make me the chief of my tribe,'" Costa Mesa Battalion Chief Scott Broussard told the Pilot.
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It did -- if becoming chief of the tribe means restricting blood flow and causing one's penis to swell to the point that the device cannot be removed. When he arrived at Hoag Memorial Hospital Presbyterian in Newport Beach, doctors tried to convince the man he needed immediate treatment.
That's where the multi-skilled urban search and rescue team and a surgical saw came in. The Pilot reported that squad members cut through the inch-thick ring -- producing sparks that flew across the room -- during a two-hour process.
"They also slid a little piece of metal between the collar and his thing, so if it slipped past it wouldn’t hit his thing," Broussard told the Pilot.
Keith Jones, deputy fire chief in Costa Mesa, told the OC Register that the man's penis remained fully intact.
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