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  • Warning labels

    Warning! Keep your pants on when sitting in the Interactive Health massage chair featuring "Human Touch Technology." The full text of this important safety tip read: "Do not use massage chair without clothing. Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving." That warning is winner--a winner of the Wacky Warning Label Contest, that is. Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch, a group whose goal is to show that fear of frivolous lawsuits has led to a loss of corporate common sense, sponsors an annual contest for the wackiest warning labels.

    Second Place: "Do not use snow blower on the roof."
    Third Place: "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher."


    Other entrants:

    --A warning on an electric router made for carpenters cautions, "This product not intended for use as a dental drill."

    --A warning label found on a baby stroller cautions the user: "Remove child before folding."

    --A bottle of prescription sleeping pills says, "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

    --A sticker on a toilet at a public facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan actually warns: "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking."

    --A CD player carries this unusual warning: "Do not use the Ultradisc2000 as a projectile in a catapult."

    --An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter cautions, "Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks."

    --A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use "while sleeping or unconscious."

    --A container of underarm deodorant says, "Caution: Do not spray in eyes."

    --A cartridge for a laser printer warns, "Do not eat toner."

    --A household iron warns users: "Never iron clothes while they are being worn."

  • #2
    quote:
    "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking
    My cats never read this label!

    I demand a label in Felinese!

    [ 01-21-2003, 02:53 AM: Message edited by: C in a J ]

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    • #3
      The scary part is that for every one of those warnings, you know there was some twit that caused it. [Eek!]

      Comment


      • #4
        Anybody stupid enough to be hurt by doing any of these things was muddying up our gene pool, should probably be sterilized to prevent contamination of the rest of the human race, and is probably incapable of reading the label, or would ignore it. Besides, some low-life personal injury lawyer like my wife's boss would find an angle, probably arguing that the warnings were intended for imbeciles, and should be done in stick person drawings.

        Stupid people should not breed.
        "But if it be a sin to covet honor, I am the most offending soul alive." from Henry V, by Wm. Shakespeare

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        • #5
          ROFL... especially at the first one... i needed a laugh..

          and yes, it's unfortunate what product manufacturers have to go thru because of stupid or greedy people.
          "You did what you knew how to do...and when you knew better, you did better." ~~Maya Angelou

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          • #6
            I wonder how many of those exist because of technical writers with a sense of humor?

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            • #7
              Actually, I have seen a few that didn't sound as stupid in the native language of the manufacturer, but when translated sounds kinda dumb.

              I suspect most are caused by mentally challeged people.

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              • #8
                quote:
                Originally posted by Niteshift:
                Actually, I have seen a few that didn't sound as stupid in the native language of the manufacturer, but when translated sounds kinda dumb.

                Maybe they use Babelfish as their translator.
                Government is not the solution to our problem; government is the problem. - Ronald Reagan

                I don't think It'll happen in the US because we don't trust our government. We are a country of skeptics, raised by skeptics, founded by skeptics. - Amaroq

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                • #9
                  LMAO !!! Just what I needed to end a kinda bad day !! Thanks !!!
                  Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.

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                  • #10
                    just like on many car commercials you see the disclaimer "professional drivers on a closed course" because you KNOW there is going to be that one good 'ol boy Billy Bob who is going to remember seeing that commercial and do a "here, hold muh beer while i try something" while he is driving.
                    I'll post, You argue.

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                    • #11
                      "because you KNOW there is going to be that one good 'ol boy Billy Bob who is going to remember seeing that commercial and do a "here, hold muh beer while i try something" while he is driving."

                      Just remember, a redneck's last words are usually "Hey ya'all, watch this!"

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                      • #12
                        LOL.. i like that one.

                        Jay Leno reads some warning labels translated from Japanese and they're a riot too.
                        "You did what you knew how to do...and when you knew better, you did better." ~~Maya Angelou

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