Warning labels

[Niteshift]

Warning! Keep your pants on when sitting in the Interactive Health massage chair featuring "Human Touch Technology." The full text of this important safety tip read: "Do not use massage chair without clothing. Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving." That warning is winner--a winner of the Wacky Warning Label Contest, that is. Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch, a group whose goal is to show that fear of frivolous lawsuits has led to a loss of corporate common sense, sponsors an annual contest for the wackiest warning labels.

Second Place: "Do not use snow blower on the roof."
Third Place: "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher."

Other entrants:

--A warning on an electric router made for carpenters cautions, "This product not intended for use as a dental drill."

--A warning label found on a baby stroller cautions the user: "Remove child before folding."

--A bottle of prescription sleeping pills says, "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

--A sticker on a toilet at a public facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan actually warns: "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking."

--A CD player carries this unusual warning: "Do not use the Ultradisc2000 as a projectile in a catapult."

--An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter cautions, "Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks."

--A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use "while sleeping or unconscious."

--A container of underarm deodorant says, "Caution: Do not spray in eyes."

--A cartridge for a laser printer warns, "Do not eat toner."

--A household iron warns users: "Never iron clothes while they are being worn."

[CinaC]

quote:

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"Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking

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My cats never read this label!

I demand a label in Felinese!

[ 01-21-2003, 02:53 AM: Message edited by: C in a J ]

[Niteshift]

The scary part is that for every one of those warnings, you know there was some twit that caused it.

[Bob A]

Anybody stupid enough to be hurt by doing any of these things was muddying up our gene pool, should probably be sterilized to prevent contamination of the rest of the human race, and is probably incapable of reading the label, or would ignore it. Besides, some low-life personal injury lawyer like my wife's boss would find an angle, probably arguing that the warnings were intended for imbeciles, and should be done in stick person drawings.

Stupid people should not breed.

[jellybean40]

ROFL... especially at the first one... i needed a laugh..

and yes, it's unfortunate what product manufacturers have to go thru because of stupid or greedy people.

[CinaC]

I wonder how many of those exist because of technical writers with a sense of humor?

[Niteshift]

Actually, I have seen a few that didn't sound as stupid in the native language of the manufacturer, but when translated sounds kinda dumb.

I suspect most are caused by mentally challeged people.

[ateamer]

quote:

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Originally posted by Niteshift:
Actually, I have seen a few that didn't sound as stupid in the native language of the manufacturer, but when translated sounds kinda dumb.

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Maybe they use Babelfish as their translator.

[Fastie]

LMAO !!! Just what I needed to end a kinda bad day !! Thanks !!!

[nickg]

just like on many car commercials you see the disclaimer "professional drivers on a closed course" because you KNOW there is going to be that one good 'ol boy Billy Bob who is going to remember seeing that commercial and do a "here, hold muh beer while i try something" while he is driving.

[Niteshift]

"because you KNOW there is going to be that one good 'ol boy Billy Bob who is going to remember seeing that commercial and do a "here, hold muh beer while i try something" while he is driving."

Just remember, a redneck's last words are usually "Hey ya'all, watch this!"

[jellybean40]

LOL.. i like that one.

Jay Leno reads some warning labels translated from Japanese and they're a riot too.