Back part time

[Mitzi]

I'm back but just part time. I can't believe what a backslide I went into. I've been on bed rest and meds (wheee!). But, I'm allowed up a bit and the meds have been cut back. I just couldn't handle the stress anymore....I crashed BIG time! I didn't know a person could cry that much.
I just couldn't accept my son could not have that surgery after 8 years of trying to arrange it and praying and hoping.
But, I will be ok....I'm just shaky emotionally still. And I'm glad Sgt. Dave doesn't know about the Bugs Bunny Quilt I have

[ 03-11-2002: Message edited by: Mitzi ]

[BeatleFan]

Sending you Cyber-Hugs, Mitzi. I read your son's story and simply don't know what else to say.

[Arctic Cop]

The longest journey in one's life always goes one step at a time.

[Mitzi]

There isnn't anything really much anyone that can be said. I don't think I will ever totally be myself ever again. I carry much anger over this. It was my one hope and it was given and taken away. I am pretty d*** mad about it. Our lives will never be the same. Life goes on but I just hope I can find a reason to keep living it to the fullest like I used to. All hope of him ever having a normal life is gone. I try to kid around and all but it just isn't there anymore. I feel empty inside.

[EAGLE6]

I pray that you will find some peace Mitzi... and as for your son... sounds to me like a hero! Never give up, never ever....keep fighting, for it's people like you and your family who endure the hardships of life that would crush many others.... some of us draw from your strength and courage so that we can make through as well. Thank you! you will never know what an inspiration you are to some of us.

[Fastie]

Mitzi,
So glad to see you're back!!!

[Joseph]

Well Mitzi glad to see you back. I went through a rough time after the death of my wife. I could work after a 6 month leave of absence but the minute I would leave the station my personal feelings would come out and I could barely handle it. The dept said since it was personal and could do the job they gave me no problem. I will never get over it but it does get a little easier with time. However it never goes away. You have to go through the anger, then the denial, then the acceptance of this is the way it's going to be. It will be hard but hang in there. There are a lot of people out here praying for you and the whole family. Just take it one day at a time talk about it and cry whenever you feel you need to. If you don't you will turn it inward and will really get depressed. I didn't get this out of a book I lived the nightmare too. God Bless You and nice to see you back.

[Mitzi]

I'm trying. Wow, I really went into a downard spiral. Even David's neurosurgeon has been calling to see how I am. My body and mind fel like they have been hit by lots of badeball bats. Now, I'm having bad nightmares. I can't remember when I last had a nightmare.
I had just held on to this hope David COULD have this surgery for 8 years. I never realized I could take it hard when he could not have his surgery. Seeing him in the ICU, all the other people in the ICU, being told he could have the surgery then he couldn't was just to much for me. I still feel very weak and tired. Hopefully, time will take care of that.