How to avoid the Locker room backstabbing?

[Franky]

I have been on my department as a patrolman for under a year though I dispatched and was a special officer there for a little over 2 years. I get along with 99% of the guys but am having a little trouble something.
Whatever shift I work it seems that whatever guys I am on with talk trash about everyone who is off. If one of these people walk in the door its "Hey buddy whats up"! When they leave its right back to two face comments.
They micro-analize everyone's personal lives, their families, and EVERY little thing they do at work. I am sure they butcher me when I am not there too.
I have been trying to stay out of this but find it almost like a vacuum that sucks you in. It seems that no matter what you do if you are there when something is said and a person finds out, you are involved.
I hear that this is the scourge of PD's everywhere, do any vets have any wise tips for me on what to do about this? Thanks

[shooter1201]

The EASY answer is to simply refuse to allow yourself to become a participant. Such antics drag individuals AND departments down.

Do I always follow this advice? Sadly, no....I'm human, too, but I'm working on it!

[occiferdave]

It's true...

we cops are like a bunch of naggy and gossipy old women.

[207]

It's like that where I'm at. You usually have one bigmouth in the group and others will throw in their 2 cents worth just to appease the bigmouth.
Bigmouth is usually the dept slacker, the one that doesn't like the shift they're on, doesn't like overtime, they file idiotic grievences against other personnel, and only does police work if they really have to. If fact we have one that stated "if I didn't see it happen, it didn't happen".

I just try to avoid these types, in fact if it isn't "business related" I don't even bother talking to them.

[EPD209]

207 has the right idea...You will learn in this business and even Bratton from NYPD said it....10% of the police officer do 90% of the police work..Just be yourself do your work and dont get into the cliques...I have the same problem in my agency...I am leaving anyway but you just learn to ignore it....The big clique in my PD is the softball clique which I think is a game for girls anyway..enough said

[John Kelly]

Doesn't matter what job your in mate, they all got locker rooms. Best thing to is to keep your mouth shut and listen.

[txinvestigator1]

What John Kelly said is the truth.

Shut the FU and if pressed say, "man, I don't know, I'm to F'in tired to think."

[gazza]

bingo on that john,go to work ,watch your n your mates back ,get the job done and go home,pick up your pay cheque and f%^* the cliques

[kateykakes]

What John said is true - it happens everywhere.

My job is nothing like yours, but in my office, I deal with the same BS you all put up with. Most of the time I just block out the gosspip, or I put on my headphones and listen to music.

I am friendly with everyone at work, but I tend to stay from all the cliques. Who's got time for that garbage?

Best advice I could offer: When they start talking about someone, just walk away. They will eventually get the hint. And you're right, they probably do talk about you when you're not around (just as they probably talk about each other when one is missing from the group). Should you really care what they say behind your back? I'd be concerned about it only if they start paying your bills.

I wish you the best the luck on this.

[ 03-09-2002: Message edited by: kateykakes ]

[Joseph]

I just tried to stay clear of it all and the ones that ran there mouths were usually always the same ones. Everybody realizes it gets old after a while.

[Dinosaur]

Do you think Franky's coming back?

....anybody wan't to talk about him while he's gone?

[JKT]

Originally posted by Dinosaur:
Do you think Franky's coming back?

....anybody wan't to talk about him while he's gone?

Considering that he's made 12 posts since June of last year, it may be a while before he responds.

I agree that the best thing to do is ignore the comments. I have one co-worker that I routinely ignore, and he STILL doesn't get the hint. Shoot, he doesn't even take direct comments. He still hasn't slowed down on the derogatory comments about nearly EVERYONE that he works with, but hasn't gained any popularity with it either.

[Franky]

Thanks for the replies guys. JKT I have made so few posts because I joined this forum right before I left for the Academy, now that I am finished I have time to post. Dinosaur, I like that line

[207]

Originally posted by Franky:
Dinosaur, I like that line

Then it's O.K. that we all talk about you when you're "offline"??

[JKT]

Originally posted by Franky:
Thanks for the replies guys. JKT I have made so few posts because I joined this forum right before I left for the Academy, now that I am finished I have time to post. Dinosaur, I like that line

No flame intended, Franky.

It's just that I have seen a lot of folks post a question or two, not like the answers and move on.

Keep them coming, sir, there is a lot of experience here to be tapped.