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    MadMan
    • Nov 2003
    • 2091

    He put a lock on my....

    Police: Man's Testicles Locked In Padlock
    Man Could Not Remove Lock For Two Weeks

    POSTED: 3:02 pm CDT August 5, 2005
    UPDATED: 3:15 pm CDT August 5, 2005

    BRENTWOOD, N.H. -- Emergency workers helped a New Hampshire man out of a difficult situation over the weekend after a friend apparently locked a padlock around his testicles.

    According to the Portsmouth Herald, police reported that the 39-year-old man was intoxicated when they arrived at the scene on July 30 at about 3:40 a.m. The man, who was not identified, told them that he had the padlock around his testicles for two weeks.

    The man said that a friend put the lock on while he was drunk and passed out. When he woke up, the friend was gone.

    "Never in my 13 years have I seen anything like this," Cpl. H.D. Wood told the Herald.

    The man told police that he tried to remove the lock with a hacksaw because the key had broken off in the lock.

    He was taken to Exeter Hospital, where a locksmith removed the padlock. He was treated and released, and the hospital said he had no lasting injury.

    Police said that they did not know the motive for the incident.

    Poor Locksmith.
    A true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.

    -GK Chesterton
  • toby101

    #2
    Poor locksmith, and also what the hell was this guy thinking. I can understand doing it when your pass out, but for 2 weeks. There is something wrong there.

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      MadMan
      • Nov 2003
      • 2091

      #3
      Originally posted by toby101
      Poor locksmith, and also what the hell was this guy thinking. I can understand doing it when your pass out, but for 2 weeks. There is something wrong there.

      You mean like there being a padlock firmly attached to his boys?
      A true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.

      -GK Chesterton

      Comment

      • Tattoo'd Angel
        Because it's FUN!
        • May 2005
        • 856

        #4
        He should just be glad that his "buddy" didn't go one step farther and chain the boys to a bike rack.



        Yes, I'm a twisted individual. And I like it!
        STFU! Another great suggestion from the same mind that brought you "Kiss my butt" and "Leave me alone"


        Why not?

        Comment

        • Java King
          Heyyyy, What's up there!
          • Apr 2005
          • 1640

          #5
          Sounds like the male version of a Chastity belt
          That's right, bring me my royal coffee!

          Comment

          • Buttercup
            Got my back?
            • Apr 2005
            • 9603

            #6
            Two weeks! He had to have been in so much pain. I can't even begin to imagine what that must have looked like....

            How did he...? Or....? And what about....? Oh, never mind......
            All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsions, habit, reason, passion and desire.

            Comment

            • mach4
              Forum Member
              • Jun 2004
              • 178

              #7
              How did he sit, walk and ummm...you know??

              Comment

              • zap
                Forum Member
                • Sep 2004
                • 1490

                #8
                Originally posted by Tattoo'd Angel
                He should just be glad that his "buddy" didn't go one step farther and chain the boys to a bike rack.



                Yes, I'm a twisted individual. And I like it!


                ROFLMAO too funny!
                An impressionable child in a tumultuous world, and they say I'm at a difficult stage... --Meat Loaf

                Professional Stupidity Recognition Technician

                Comment

                • CPDZone9

                  #9
                  Come on, he was probably just trying to make an Energizer bunny out of himself.

                  Comment

                  • Photogrrlz
                    Queen of the Deuce
                    • Jun 2003
                    • 5176

                    #10
                    hmmmm......


                    need I say more.....
                    THE OTHER PLACE...A Forum to get away to

                    Patience with ignorance

                    Everyone is gay until proven striaght.

                    I am the one you want and what you want is so unreal--M.M.

                    When all of your wishes are granted, many of your dreams will be destroyed--M.M.

                    Art may imitate life, but life imitates TV--Ani Difranco

                    Comment

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