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Do you let Family members ride along with you?

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  • Do you let Family members ride along with you?

    When I had been out on my own on the streets for about a year I decided one Saturday Night that I would have my wife Ride-Along with me. We have a pretty conservative RideAlong Policy and all I had to do was get permission from my supervisor. She had been begging to come along with me some night to see what I did.

    The shift started great. We stopped a few cars and we had went to a couple of smaller calls. I then got a call of an intoxicated male causing a disturbance at a Hospital. Apparently a drunk was getting stitches in his hand and was getting all mean with the staff.

    I was the first unit on scene and I actually met the Suspect staggering out of the front doors of the hospital. He was followed by a nurse. I spoke with the guy and he is being a drunk *******. The nurse told me that the stitches were only partly done. The guy was bleeding all over... I found out later he had beat his wife and punched out a car window.

    So I am standing in the entryway of the hospital with my car parked in the emergency lane which is right by the entryway... all this in full view of my wife.

    As things happen with drunks, they start escalating with this guy. It is clear the only option I am really going to have is to arrest him. Back Up is already in route and we get to the point where something really needs to be done.

    I tell the guy he is under arrest. The guy keeps walking away from me and finally reaches the front of my car. I try to stop him by just grabbing his arm and he pulls away and puts his hands up. I spray paint his face with my OC. He comes towards me a little bit then stops, dances around awhile holding his face. I put him down on my hood... hard... as backup arrives and put him in cuffs.

    My backup and I get the guy back in the hospital and they stitch him all the way up quickly and we decontaminate him. I walk with him out to our cars and my backup says he will tranport him to jail.

    I get in my patrol car and look over at my wife with a smile. She is sitting looking at me with a few tears rolling down her eyes and her hands are shaking like leaves. She was scared to death....

    Ever since then I have decided that no more of my loved ones or my family will ride with me again. I would never forgive myself if something happened to me or god forbid them when they are with me. Its cool to have Family with you and show them what you do, but for me it is not worth it.

    Have any responses, suggestions or comments?

    BIGCOP
    Retired 02/01/13

  • #2
    My department would never allow that. My father is a sgt. in a different division and we are not allowed to work together at all.

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    • #3
      My department has somewhat of a tradition of new deputies taking their wife/girlfriend out on their first solo shift. And there's really no limit on how often family members can go out with us.

      I took my wife out on my first solo shift. She seemed to enjoy it, but nothing really happened. I've explained to her how bad things can get, and she makes the decision to come or not.

      If I had had an incident like yours with her in the car, she'd probably be crying too. I'd leave it up to her to decide if she wants to come out with me again or not. Personally I think it's better if she really understands what I do, but I certainly wouldn't try to force her to come if she didn't want to.
      ~Slippery Pete~

      If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

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      • #4
        Off the topic a bit here but, didn't that hospital have any Security? We get that alot at the hospital where I work & we handle stuff like that ourselves. We rarely call in the police unless we want to press charges.
        On a side note, we see the average citizen in the waiting room who views something like this. They look at us like we just killed the guy or something. I don't think the general public has any clue until something like that goes down.
        That's right, bring me my royal coffee!

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        • #5
          We have three area hospitals. Two of them have moonlighting jobs for police officers. The other does not and we are always responding to calls... It has been a sore spot for awhile.

          They dont want to pony up the dough for the security since they do not have a psych wing...
          Retired 02/01/13

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          • #6
            My brother rides with me all the time. I think it just depends on the person. I would never in 1,000 years take my girlfriend on a ride.
            It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses....Hit it!

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            • #7
              I had my wife ride with me a few times and the last time we got into a 45 min chase on the backroads with fast speeds. It was hard to talk on the radio with her screaming!

              No to steal the threat....but what about a loved one being a dispatcher? She was dispatching when we were dating and she just come on shift and I was on a late call. Got into a big fight and the emergency button went off just as she walked into dispatch - Now that freaked her out and she decided that she really didn't want to know everything.

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              • #8
                I took my wife along on 1 ride along just so she could see what I do. I was surprised when she didn't try to tell me how to drive, to speed-up, slow down. "your'e following too close" and so on. Anyways, she was enlightened as to how people act.
                Extremism in the pursuit of liberty is no vice. Barry Goldwater

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Rentacop
                  I had my wife ride with me a few times and the last time we got into a 45 min chase on the backroads with fast speeds. It was hard to talk on the radio with her screaming
                  That is funny... My wifes first time she just the opposite, had to go from my beat to another, Code 3 bobbing and weaving through traffic. She was white as a ghost and the only words she said was... "That was awesome!" I love my wife
                  ~Wise men stand behind me, Brave men stand beside me, only Fools stand against me!~

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                  • #10
                    You know, I bet that would be a good way to get rid of a girl that isn't right for you. I'll have to remember that when I start dating after getting on.
                    It's the ones you love that will kill you the quickest.

                    Official O.COM Man of Mystery.

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                    • #11
                      I took my brother out one night, but he's a deputy sheriff in Maine, and therefore exempt from our ridealong policy where civilians ride with a handpicked ***-kisser that doesn't respond to calls.

                      I wouldn't want my wife riding with me, I'd never forgive myself if she got hurt.
                      Talk sense to a fool, and he will call you foolish - Euripides

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                      • #12
                        ok a bit off topic again but a comment spurred this question...how often do riders get hurt on a ride along? (I don't know if this has been discussed before or not)

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                        • #13
                          It's rare, but it happens, and at least a few have been killed.
                          Talk sense to a fool, and he will call you foolish - Euripides

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Vpr92rt10
                            ok a bit off topic again but a comment spurred this question...how often do riders get hurt on a ride along? (I don't know if this has been discussed before or not)
                            About 3 years ago, the husband of a female LE official in metro Atlanta was doing a ride along in one of our rougher precincts. They responded to a call about a male walking down the middle of a major street carrying an AK-47. When he saw the patrol car approaching, he opened up on them. The officer & the ride along bailed out and took cover, with the officer returning fire. Several others arrived and put several rounds into the gunman, punching his ticket.

                            When Homicide arrived and began processing the scene (including the swiss cheese Crown Vic), the ride along's headrest was found to have taken a round right through it.

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                            • #15
                              Gotta love the assigned ride along. Me and the Sarge:

                              "Here's a Brazilian judge that's here to see US law enforcement. He's all yours."

                              "Great, he doesn't speak english does he?"

                              "Nope, have fun."

                              When I finally found someone that could speak spanish and talk to him I found out he didn't speak spanish but Portugese. The police in his country were fighting Iraqi-style against the bad guys. They traveled 4 in a car and always carried automatic weapons.

                              He was shocked that I would do a traffic stop at night by myself with no back.

                              Different worlds I guess...
                              I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

                              "Why didn't you put that out on the radio?"
                              "I don't know Sarge, I guess I got caught up in the moment"
                              "The MOMENT is when we F--king need you!" - K-9 Sgt Myhre to unidentified Officer


                              In Valor there is Hope

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