Your Most Outrageous Call

[Joseph]

I've been on a lot of them but the two I remember the most are these. First we have the Port of New Orleans here. Ships dock quite often right next to one of the projects of the city. Seamen from counties leave the ships with thousands of dollars to go party. I got a call of an armed robbery. When I arrived it was a Japanese seman who had been relieved of his cash but in great pain in his stomach. He couldn't speak English so I took him to Charity Hospital. The doctor returned after an xray and said come see this you won't belive it. Anyway two blacks had shoved a 8 oz Coke bottle up his rectum. You could see the bottle with the word Coca Cola written on it. Ouch. The next got a call woman screaming for help. This was one of the Rich Areas of Town. Upon arriving we found out that this woman and her husband was into some kinky sex and had routinely place a snake in her vagina. Well needless to say the snake went wild and was chewing her up. Went to Charity where the doctor inserted an oxygen tube in it since the snake was suffocating due to lack of oxygen. It calmed down then they called a antestist to knock it out so they could remove it. She was then taken off to surgery. To all the rookies out there if you think you've seen it all and nothing else can happen. It will.

[shooter1201]

YOUR 'snake' call tops MY 'snake' call(check the archives from 3 weeks ago)....

[Mitzi]

Oh my gosh, I think I'm gonna.....puke! EWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[555]

Didn't she anticipate that outcome?

[leedesert]

Didn't she anticipate that outcome?

Actually, she didn't anticipate the "not coming out".

[Zamboni]

We respond to an assist the ambulance call. We get there first, walk in, and see a 40 year old man sitting on a chair. Here's where it gets weird. He was wearing a bra, garters, and thigh high nylons. He was holding a bloody towel to his scrotum area. Apparently he got tired of being a man and not being able to afford a sex change decided to do a do it yourself job. He dissolved some painkiller tablets in water and then injected the solution into his testicle area. He then took a kitchen knife and proceeded to cut those same testicles out. Apparently the pain started to get to him at this point and he had second thoughts because he jammed them back in and held the towel there to keep them from falling out. This still makes me cringe just thinking about it.

[jeeper]

Zamboni, WHY is that such a common call for rural areas???? I've talked to guys at training schools from quite rural areas, and BOTH of them have been on those types of calls!!



(I'm guessing, by your locationg, that you are also in a somewhat rural area?)

[Piper]

Holy Mother of Yikes at this thread!!!!!!!



[ 07-08-2002: Message edited by: Piper ]

[Mitzi]

The strangest call I got (as a Mother) was when my son came in one day and said, "Mommy, what hapens when you put beads in your ears and they don't come out?" lol Yep, he had put beads in his ears. lol

[Piper]

Doh....nevermind.

[ 07-08-2002: Message edited by: Piper ]

[Joseph]

Mitizi you'll never be a LEO with a weak stomach.

[Mitzi]

lol My weak stomach had trouble being a mother at times. lol

[Zamboni]

This wasn't me thankfully but my wife works at a hospital in Rexburg, Idaho.

A couple of months ago a woman came in on the ambulance with a broken off coke bottle stuck up a quite delicate spot. Apparently she got a little too into it and snapped the sucker.

Another guy came in attached to his vaccuum cleaner.

But the most yikes call I've ever heard of I only read about. About ten years ago a guy went into a NYC hospital with a dumbbell stuck on his you know what. Apparently he was using the hole in the dumbbell for recreational purposes and got it stuck. It was so tight that it was keeping all the blood stuck in his item and as such it couldn't go limp. The doctors had to make an incision on it to drain the blood and allow it to go back to its lesser size.

[kirch]

I was working as an EMT a few years ago and we got a call for a "woman with back pain." It turns out the 'back pain' was being caused by a...ummm...let's call it a tubular massager. The item had apparently been inserted in an orifice it was not designed for and, in the heat of passion, had slipped all the way in. No amount of pushing or straining would send it back out. Eventually, she started getting muscle spasms that were causing the pain.

We asked what hospital she wants to go to and the husband says "Hospital A" because that's where their insurance is. She went ballistic -- "There's no f***ing way I'm going there!" and the like. It seemed she was a nurse at said hospital and didn't want her co-workers finding out.

So we transported her to Hospital B. The whole way in, the husband told our driver "It was her idea. No one's going to believe me, but it was her idea."

[seadog]

I got called out to work a scene of a DOA that had been slightly ripe for a few days. It appeared to be a "natural" death at autopsy until the doctor jumped back and said, "Holy Christ what is with this guy's rectum? He has a lot of pus up in there and "damage"...An examination revealed that this idiot had stuffed a tennis ball up his butt and could not get it out...He must have been too embarrassed to go to the ER, got septic shock and croaked. Another one swimming at the shallow end of the gene pool...