Any remodelers out there?

[Mitzi]

I know some of you MUST have hobbies concerening working on the house and I REALLY need help. Our 25 year old son lives with us. When he goes to bed at night, he wants the house QUIET. I mean NO sound. Well, I am a night owl so the TV bothers him of course, I have put a blanket on his door. Thre are two closets outside his door, so I open the doors to help further with the sounds. He even places a towel UNDER his door.
I try to kep the TV at a moderate level but INEITABLEY EVERY SINGLE SOLITARY NIGHT he will come out to complain the TV is too loud.
We have had some real rows about this. YES,I had my hearing checked and I'm fine.
I think some of it might be psychological. Tonight, when he went to bed, I purposely lowered the TV to where I couldn't hear it. Here he comes. "MOM! TURN THE TV down!" I admit, I really let him have it.
He desperatly needs his own place and that is going to be happening SOON if I have anything to say about it.
Does anyone have any suggestions to further soundproof hins room? This is really making me having hard feelings toward him. I fel it's somewhat of a control method on his part. Even my husband told him, "You want her to turn it off and she's not going to. She's straining to hear it now. She is NOT going to go to bed because she can't listen to her own TV!"
I mean, we have had some real rows over it.

[klar]

LOL a easy way to get it so that he can not hear is to hook your tv into the stereo system and then place head phones on your head. This way you can have the volum set to where you want it and no sound will make it to sons room. I think since it is night and sound has the tendency to carry more at night as there are less sounds to compete with it. You can also look into getting a better door for his room. You probally have a hollow core door that is very lightweight and easy to break aprt. They do not block sounds worth anything. I would get a nice solid wood door. It will cost you a bit but a solid door will block sounds a lot better. Also get a few hanging rugs. These will muffle sound if placed on a wall between the sound and area you want quiet. IF that fails build a apartment above the unattatched garage and move his butt in there. Once he moves out you can rent it out as a one bed room apartment and have a income coming in LOL

Klar

[Mitzi]

Heck no, once he moves out, there's going to be no one here but me and my husband. Funny thing is, the whole time he was growing up, out son never one time complained about the TV. He was maried for not quite a year and came back here. Now it's nothing but compalints!

[klar]

LOL I would go with the better doors and hanging rugs then LOL

Klar

[LeslieBScott]

Hanging rugs, solid core door, sound-proof tiles, etc are good ideas, but can get expensive. Your son is 25 years old, and is therefore a guest in your home. If he is disturbed, then he should either 1)find a quieter place to live, or 2)pay for the improvements himself.

You did your job raising him for eighteen years. He is not only looking for a free ride, but forcing you to inconvenience yourselves to fit his wishes.

[CopInNY]

Kick him out. 25 is rather old to be living with mommy and daddy anyhow.

[Don]

Originally posted by Mitzi:
I think some of it might be psychological. Tonight, when he went to bed, I purposely lowered the TV to where I couldn't hear it. Here he comes. "MOM! TURN THE TV down!"

You've answered your own question here. There is really no need for further comment on remodeling the HOUSE. But you do need to remodel your relationship with your son. Get him OUT ON HIS OWN again.

By now, Mitzi, you should know that two famlies under one roof seldom work. And yes, considering your son's age, the fact that he has been married and out on his own, means that you can consider yourself and your husband one family, and your son another family. (A family of one is a rather SMALL family, but still. . .)

[Mitzi]

There is a reason he is here. His health from the brain tumor is getting better but is still not great. But, I do think he is ok enough to get his own place now.. His seizures are better and the scars from the surgery are finally healed.
That's why I feel guilty getting mad at him. He's been through so mch. But, we have definitely come to the point something has to be done.
I think he and his girlfriend may be getting a place together. She seems very concerned about his heath and that would help me.
I'm sure he's just as sick of me as I am of him at this point. And believe me, he really riles up if someone teases him about living with Mommy and Daddy.
I am just so sick of hearing that door open and the inevitable, "Mom, turn it DOWN." I've gotten to where I won't now because he's just going to have to get used to it. I told him I felt sorry for him if he ever has kids! I remember going to work after being up with him all night!
It's called giving and taking and I told him I don't see much giving on his part. I love him dearly but he does need his own place now.
In some ways, it's scary because he has always neded us so much because of his illness. But he's good about his meds, I never have to remind him anymore (20 pills A DAY!). He can't drive but that can be worked out.
So, the time HAS come, I know that. Then you guys will get to listen to me whine how much I miss him. lol

[ 06-27-2002: Message edited by: Mitzi ]