The things I find myself getting into....
'Dispatch, 411?'
'Go ahead.'
'We just received a call from a woman saying there's a snake in her dining room and she'd like it removed.'
I'm not kidding....
'Uhhhh, 10-4.' All the time I'm thinking 'How in the hell am I gonna do THIS?!'
A few minutes later, I roll up to the address given, followed shortly by my 'backup', who's laughing himself silly as he exits his car. At least he didn't get out with his shotgun. This guy HATES snakes more than I do.
Long story short...the lady is outside her house, visibly shaken. I ask her to describe the snake and give me the last location she saw it.
'It's about 4 feet long and has a diamond pattern on its back.'
Lovely....
I'm praying it's a chicken snake(sounds like it), but am preparing myself for worse.
My partner and I enter the house, me first, naturally.....and began moving furniture around so we can have room to move(run like hell) if needed. The snake is exactly where she said it was...coiled up in a corner in her dining room, right under a chair.
My partner focuses his light on the snake so I can try to see what we're dealing with. OK...it appears to be about 4-5 feet long, slender body, diamond patterned...but wrong kind of head to be a BAD one....I hope. Looks like a chicken snake. Whew!
Looking around, I grab a broom and a large trashcan. The 'plan' is to herd the snake(with the broom) into the trashcan and take it outside. I tip the chair forward and move it out of the way.
GREAT plan....but the snake ain't buying it. It attempts to 'escape' under the china cabinet. I pin it to the floor with the broom, then 'sweep' it back into the corner from which it came.
Let's try this again. Nope...ain't happening. I really DON'T like snakes, but I don't really want to kill it, either. I mean, as snakes go, a chicken snake is a good snake. Riiiight.
Finally, after about 10 minutes of TRYING to be nice, I tell my partner to grab my ASP and when I tell him to, use it on the snake.
'Say WHAT?!'
Yep...that's the response he gave me. Remember. This guy is deathly afraid of snakes. This snake is 4-5 FEET long. My ASP is only 22 inches long.
I finally convince him to do it. So...I repin the snake to the floor...right on this lady's oriental rug...give my partner the signal, and....WHACK!
Asped by an ASP.
Some days are DEFINITELY more interesting than others!
'Dispatch, 411?'
'Go ahead.'
'We just received a call from a woman saying there's a snake in her dining room and she'd like it removed.'
I'm not kidding....
'Uhhhh, 10-4.' All the time I'm thinking 'How in the hell am I gonna do THIS?!'
A few minutes later, I roll up to the address given, followed shortly by my 'backup', who's laughing himself silly as he exits his car. At least he didn't get out with his shotgun. This guy HATES snakes more than I do.
Long story short...the lady is outside her house, visibly shaken. I ask her to describe the snake and give me the last location she saw it.
'It's about 4 feet long and has a diamond pattern on its back.'
Lovely....
I'm praying it's a chicken snake(sounds like it), but am preparing myself for worse.
My partner and I enter the house, me first, naturally.....and began moving furniture around so we can have room to move(run like hell) if needed. The snake is exactly where she said it was...coiled up in a corner in her dining room, right under a chair.
My partner focuses his light on the snake so I can try to see what we're dealing with. OK...it appears to be about 4-5 feet long, slender body, diamond patterned...but wrong kind of head to be a BAD one....I hope. Looks like a chicken snake. Whew!
Looking around, I grab a broom and a large trashcan. The 'plan' is to herd the snake(with the broom) into the trashcan and take it outside. I tip the chair forward and move it out of the way.
GREAT plan....but the snake ain't buying it. It attempts to 'escape' under the china cabinet. I pin it to the floor with the broom, then 'sweep' it back into the corner from which it came.
Let's try this again. Nope...ain't happening. I really DON'T like snakes, but I don't really want to kill it, either. I mean, as snakes go, a chicken snake is a good snake. Riiiight.
Finally, after about 10 minutes of TRYING to be nice, I tell my partner to grab my ASP and when I tell him to, use it on the snake.
'Say WHAT?!'
Yep...that's the response he gave me. Remember. This guy is deathly afraid of snakes. This snake is 4-5 FEET long. My ASP is only 22 inches long.
I finally convince him to do it. So...I repin the snake to the floor...right on this lady's oriental rug...give my partner the signal, and....WHACK!
Asped by an ASP.
Some days are DEFINITELY more interesting than others!

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