Tell your funny L/E stories

[BNWS]

I was reading another thread when someone posted a story that I found to be one of the funniest L/E stories I have ever heard. I wanted to start a thread devoted only to funny incidents. I already posted this on the other thread but I'll repost it here to start the thread off.

I'm working in a large metroplitan city and I'm responding as backup to a call for a burglary in progress at about 1900 hours on the 16th floor of 30 floor office building. we get up to the 16th floor with about 6 or 8 other cops and determin the crime was long over. So we leave the initial unit to take a report and 6 of us pile into the elevator to resume patrol. We go down about two floors and an old lady gets in and as soon as the doors close she immediatly starts chastising us about holding up the elevators. As she's in the middle of her rant one of the cops lets out one of the loudest, longest, smelliest farts I've ever heard. She spins around to glare at 6 redfaced cops who can barely contain their laughter. We get to the ground floor and she storms off followed by the howling laughter of 6 uniformed cops and the stench that eminated from one of thier a**es

[EmmaPeel]

The little old lady chastising you sounds like something you'd see on YouTube, LOL. My mind's eye has a very distinct picture of what SHE looks like and what all of YOU look like.

[BNWS]

She was about 5 foot nothing, 90 pounds soaking wet and aound 80 years old. You cant really tell off someone this old. Most of the time you just take it and say yes ma'am, I know Ma'am, your right ma'am. But a well timed fart told her exactly what we were thinking and she knew it.

[EmmaPeel]

She was about 5 foot nothing, 90 pounds soaking wet and aound 80 years old. You cant really tell off someone this old. Most of the time you just take it and say yes ma'am, I know Ma'am, your right ma'am. But a well timed fart told her exactly what we were thinking and she knew it.

Yep, that's exactly what I was picturing....with short curly gray hair.

Love those 80 year olds - not a PC bone in their bodies!

[EmmaPeel]

See BNWS, I knew there were lots of funny stories stored in the collective memory here. Sometimes it takes a certain spark to make the creative juices flow. See the "Gotta Love Parking Enforcement Thread" in this forum.

IT almost should be titled "tell your funny stories"........ hilarious

[Shush]

Yeah I picture her looking like Estelle Getty's character in Golden Girls. lol

[EmmaPeel]

Yeah I picture her looking like Estelle Getty's character in Golden Girls. lol

Wait - that's who I was thinking of but couldn't put my finger on. Thanks for that Shush.

[swat_op506]

Mine will be in the book I plan to write.
It is a long story, but involves two lesbians, a mentally challenged sperm donor, a Dixie cup, a turkey baster, a trailer park, and a trip to the ER for a rape kit.

Honestly, with 20 years in, it is THE BEST STORY EVER.

[EmmaPeel]

Mine will be in the book I plan to write.
It is a long story, but involves two lesbians, a mentally challenged sperm donor, a Dixie cup, a turkey baster, a trailer park, and a trip to the ER for a rape kit.

Honestly, with 20 years in, it is THE BEST STORY EVER.

Why is it that I don't think you're kidding one bit, 506.

[Gunnersmate323]

I have 1000s of good ones! When I first got on patrol one of the jobs the rookies had to do was pick up the mobile radar speed sign and place it whatever area the SGTs wanted it in that day. Well one of the pranks between the old guys and rookies was to move it and hide it in a random part of town. Well it was my week and I went to the garage to pick my unit and the sign-up which I had left hooked to my car the night before and pulled it to the school zone about 15 miles away. Well once I stopped to unhook it and turn it on I could hear screaming and pounding from inside the sign ( area with the electronics and batteries about half the size of a porta john), one of the SGTs had got inside it to scare me when I did my morning checks on it (which I never did). Well I got the *** chewing of a lifetime in front of about 300 school kids. All because I didn't do morning checks on the sign. But it was worth it to me to know his joke back fired on him!! And he had to ride in that thing across town in 90 degree heat!

[swat_op506]

Why is it that I don't think you're kidding one bit, 506.

No kidding- truth is usually stranger than fiction.

[EmmaPeel]

I have 1000s of good ones! When I first got on patrol one of the jobs the rookies had to do was pick up the mobile radar speed sign and place it whatever area the SGTs wanted it in that day. Well one of the pranks between the old guys and rookies was to move it and hide it in a random part of town. Well it was my week and I went to the garage to pick my unit and the sign-up which I had left hooked to my car the night before and pulled it to the school zone about 15 miles away. Well once I stopped to unhook it and turn it on I could hear screaming and pounding from inside the sign ( area with the electronics and batteries about half the size of a porta john), one of the SGTs had got inside it to scare me when I did my morning checks on it (which I never did). Well I got the *** chewing of a lifetime in front of about 300 school kids. All because I didn't do morning checks on the sign. But it was worth it to me to know his joke back fired on him!! And he had to ride in that thing across town in 90 degree heat!

Love it.

[EmmaPeel]

No kidding- truth is usually stranger than fiction.

Ain't that the truth.