Black sheep and skeletons in closets....midnite ramblings

[shooter1201]

Last week, I found out the 'mother' I arrested on 05/04/02(re: $#^&@ W/T dopers) has a brother that, in conjunction with his wife, work with hearing impaired children in my school system. Their daughter just graduated 8th grade and is as intelligent as she is beautiful. They make good money and live in an upscale section of town.

It reminded me of my similar situation. I'm a teacher and LEO...and work for what I have. However...I have a younger sister that is a heroin/methadone freak. I last saw her a year ago last February when on a meal break. I thought I recognized the woman across the room from where I was sitting. Took me a while to figure out it was my sister. The only time my parents hear from her is when she needs money.

WHY and HOW do things like THIS happen? I mean, we both, as is the case with the 2 individuals I mentioned above, had the SAME parents and were raised/treated the same growing up.

It got to the point that I lie about having a sister. I mean, I am THAT embarrassed and angry with her.

[ateamer]

You can choose your friends; you can't choose your family. Once someone starts down that road, nothing can be done until they want to stop. Being close to a couple similar situations, I feel for you.

[Joseph]

He's right you choose your friends the rest is up to you can't do much if you are related to them. I have a niece that was a beautifull girl she's 23 you should see her today. She was here and there and only seen her when she needed money. She was on coke and I have never seen anyone's skin the color of hers. It was like a skim milk white. No color whatsoever. She got pregnant and I have no idea how had a healthy baby. The parents on rasing it. The baby was addicted but is 6 years old now. She's out there some where.

[Don]

Originally posted by ateamer:
You can choose your friends; you can't choose your family.

You beat me to it, that is what I had been going to say.

Shooter, I'm sure a LOT of us on here have relatives that are or have been in much trouble. My brother and my mother were both alcoholics. While they both managed to live their days out without being thrown in jail for anything, they have both been real problems.

For my own peace of mind and sanity, I cut myself off from them as much as possible. They are neither one amoung the living now, and I doubt that they are missed by many.

[Blonde Heat]

I find myself in exactly the same situation and I sometimes ask how 4 children that obviously came out of the same spot can be so different. My sister and i are decent hard working individuals. On the other hand my younger sister and brother are a different type. She dances for money and is a addict and he did time in prison for auto theft. My sister and I have not seen them in like 10 years. Then with this stuff going with my mom we were forced to contact them out of respect. Let me tell you when i seen my little sister, i was shocked she had to weigh 50lbs wet and could not sit still to save her life. Unfortunatly my brother still does not know about my mom because we cant find him. Now the four of us have the same mom but us 2 older kids have a father who is successful, hard working and drug and alcohol free. Whilst the younger 2 have a deadbeat dad who can safely be labeled the man who held a thousand jobs but was never fired. ANd his 2 kids by his first wife are exactly like my younger sister and brother. So i am inclined it has something to do with genetics and for the most part it has to be getting mixed up in the wrong crowd as a young person.

[Mike Tx]

The one I always liked was "You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, you can pick your friends nose, but you can't pick your family."

And this little jewel about Skeletons in the closet - "Around here we don't just have skeletons in the closet, around here, you get home and the skeleton is sitting on your sofa having a beer and waiting for you."

[Mitzi]

I wouldn't know my younger brother if I saw him.It's really sad. The three of us have a manic depressive mother. Somehow, she managed to keep us seperate from each other. We all lived in the same house but that was about it. Each of us was treated differently. My brother could do no wrong. My sister just did the best she could to get by. She kept her mouth shut, did well in school and basically did everything she was told. Then there was me
Mother told me I was always the one that gave her the nost trouble, the one she wished had never been born. Of the three of us, I was the one that gave her the MOST trouble because I was my own person. She finally "broke" me in high school (I was a good student) by piling so many responsibilities on me (school, cleaning the house, 8 hours of babysitting a day SHE got paid for). I was simply exhausted all the time and in keeping me exhausted, I was like a walking zombie that just did as I was told.
Fast forward to now. My sister is still a puppet to her. She says jump and my sister asks how high. I am just now beginning to have contact with them because they are now elderly. Bu the shocker is my brother. While he had it the best growing up, he has it the worst as an adult.
But, when he married, he moved as far away from my mother as he could. This is the reason I am so careful with my own son. I never want that to happen to me.
So, for over 20 years, I have not seen him or talked to him. But, my mother let something slip that makes me realize that she is behind this. She let it slip she talked to him and said,"He's under the impression you have written him off." I got SO mad. I said, "Well, Mother, I wonder just WHO gave him that impression".
We are the sad victim of a mother with a severe mental illness. I used to watch her love to cause truble between people then sit back and watch them argue.
I feel so sorry for her and I miss my brother.