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Does the other woman deserve all the blame??


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  • #31

    I agree, it is society who places that role on a man. That's why I said it. I'm not holding anything against you or any other man. I can handle being prey. The real question is; can the predator catch its prey?
    Eighty percent of questions are statements in disguise.

    Dr. Phil McGraw


    • #32
      I am on an infidelity board here on the Web. If you want to see heartache, anguish, pain and fear, then go to an infidelity board. BOTH married person and cheater are to blame. One woman got so upset, she had a heart attack.....at age 35.
      As a mother, it broke my heart to see what my son was put through. He never said he was perfect but apparently he was supposed o be, to have the honor of being married to her. She told him, "I didn't love you when I married you. I gave you a chance to make me love you and you didn't." Nice, huh?
      Infidelity is wrong, no matter what anyone says. If a person is so unhappy they have to cheat, they should either work on their marriage or get out of it. The pain caused a loved one is not to be believed.. But both the people cheating are wrong. If yoiu know a person is married, it is NOT ok to sleep with them, no matter what anyone says.
      I hope this thread reaches anyone in here cheating. Because if you love your spose and they find out, you will never forget the sound of that breaking heart. Sounds dramatic.....but it's true.

      [ 08-22-2002, 08:13 PM: Message edited by: Mitzi ]


      • #33
        Jelly, I wasnt saying men do not have minds of their own and cannot make a decision for themselves. My point was, if temptation is there for ANYONE, then ANYONE may do what may be wrong. If the un-married party is aware that the person is married, they need to grow some morals, think of someone other then themselves, and back away. Temptation can be an evil thing if it can actually cause harm to others. THATS what I was saying. IF the unmarried party knows, they are just as to blame and the cheating spouse.

        [ 08-22-2002, 08:18 PM: Message edited by: sandie ]
        Mother is the name for God on the lips and in the hearts of all children.


        • #34
          In any endeavor, each partiscipant play a role, however subtle or unintentional, and consequently, each must take full responsibility for that part in which he or she played.

          I still say that when a married person involved him or herself in an affair, he or she is the guilty one, regardless. However, that is not to say that the person he or she had an affair with did not play a part in it, but that person was not commited to the cheater's spouse, and is therefore not responsible for what transpired in the marriage as a result, only in a moral sense if that.

          On this thing about victims. The cheater is made the victim rather than the victimizer in a lot of cases, is all I said concerning victims.

          All kinds of senarios are involved in affairs. The "other" is not always the seducer. The "other" doesn't always know that s/he is involved with a married wo/man. The other is often lied to about the married one's situation at home: "We're separated. We sleep in different bedrooms. We're in the process of a divorce. We live like roommates and I am only there because of the children. My wife/husband and I have that kind of arrangement, etc." Based on the many situations and the many so-called reasons for affairs, I stick by my opinion that it is the commited person's fault because whatever was going on in the marriage, s/he should have been there trying to fix it rather than going outside to play musical beds. Besides, a third party can't be in your relationship without an invitation, and neither can the party stay without a welcome.


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