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  • Ex and I Work for same department...

    About a year ago my girl friend was applying to agencies. A few months go by and I decide to change my career and begin applying to agencies as well. She was picked up by a phenomenal department which I had applied for as well. More months go by, test after test, background, interviews, the whole hiring process. She just graduated the academy and started her FTO. We broke up a couple months ago, since then I was also hired by her department. Yes, they knew we were together, and yes, I do believe they know we are no longer together.

    I know that we have to separate our private life from work, especially as police officers.

    My question to you is this, has anybody ever been in a situation like this, and how would any of you recommend we go about making this work?

    I obviously still love the girl, but I don't want any issues to arise, especially as two rookies.

    Thanks.

  • #2
    You NEED to tread lightly... Don't get into ANY drama. Forget her. Now. Move on. Concentrate on FTO.
    Now go home and get your shine box!

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    • #3
      Stay away!!

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      • #4
        Don't listen to them. Love will defeat the odds. Just believe that it is meant to be. I was in the exact same situation as you and it worked out great for me. Here is a pic of my soulmate.

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        • #5
          . .
          Last edited by BTDT2; 04-20-2016, 12:29 PM.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Country_Jim View Post
            Don't listen to them. Love will defeat the odds. Just believe that it is meant to be. I was in the exact same situation as you and it worked out great for me. Here is a pic of my soulmate.

            [ATTACH=CONFIG]14948[/ATTACH]


            LMAO!!!!!

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            • #7
              Californiaguy165

              I’ve supervised officers with comparable circumstances and it ended badly, career ending badly.
              Take 3C’s counsel and “Forget her. Now. Move on”.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by BTDT2 View Post
                Californiaguy165

                I’ve supervised officers with comparable circumstances and it ended badly, career ending badly.
                .
                Ditto.............
                Since some people need to be told by notes in crayon .......Don't PM me with without prior permission. If you can't discuss the situation in the open forum ----it must not be that important

                My new word for the day is FOCUS, when someone irritates you tell them to FOCUS

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                • #9
                  Years ago I attended the funeral of an LAPD motor officer who was killed in the line of duty. Normally, LAPD schedules a huge turnout when one of their own is killed, but this was the smallest police funeral I ever saw.

                  I ran into a friend there, an old time LAPD Sergeant who was nearing retirement and asked him if he knew why the funeral turnout was so small. He explained that the deceased motor officer had married and divorced so many other female LAPD officers, clericals and dispatchers that he kept the department in constant turmoil wherever he was stationed. The low number of officers assigned to his funeral was LAPD's was of expressing their unhappiness with the problems he created within the department.

                  The moral of the story is don't be that guy. Make peace with your ex and don't date or marry anyone else within your agency.
                  Going too far is half the pleasure of not getting anywhere

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                  • #10
                    don't where you eat.

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                    • #11
                      There are so many coppers that have gone down this path and been burnt before.

                      Basically: stay away. Say hello and be nice if you bump into her somewhere but go no further.

                      The potential for workplace conflict is pretty high and that is the last thing you need as a new appointee.

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                      • #12
                        Start dating men.
                        Getting shot hurts! Don't under estimate the power of live ammo. A .22LR can kill you! I personally feel that it's best to avoid being shot by any caliber. Your vest may stop the bullet, but you'll still get a nice bruise or other injury to remember the experience.

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                        • #13
                          Thanks for the honesty and support.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by HI629 View Post
                            Start dating men.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Country_Jim View Post
                              [ATTACH=CONFIG]14960[/ATTACH]

                              Quick and simple solution.
                              Getting shot hurts! Don't under estimate the power of live ammo. A .22LR can kill you! I personally feel that it's best to avoid being shot by any caliber. Your vest may stop the bullet, but you'll still get a nice bruise or other injury to remember the experience.

                              Comment

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