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Hard Decision to Make.

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  • FireCop203
    replied
    YOU and your Wife have to make that decision. For me, my first wife didn't want me to be a cop, so I wasn't till a few years down the road. I wasn't happy cause I wasn't doing what I want to do and she finally realized it. She still didn't like it and tried to make me quit not long after I started. I finally told her that I was tired of her telling me how I was going to support the family and we divorced. I was NOT going to live my life doing what SHE told me to do and be unhappy doing it.

    Leave a comment:


  • just joe
    replied
    Thanks for the update. Good luck to you.

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  • BuckFurpees
    replied
    No. At the end of the day your wife cant say what is best for you. If your heart isn't in it why try?? If you want to do LE and your heart is on it TALK it over with the family and run with it. I would never ask my husband to sacrifice his passion for a better paycheck.

    Leave a comment:


  • Happereand1934
    replied
    Are you now a police officer now? I think if in that process you were selected then you might be now a cop.
    Last edited by Happereand1934; 11-14-2016, 07:00 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • Oatmeal
    replied
    Wow, quite the happy ending (a new beginning) story. I'm really pleased to read the outcome and wish you the best of luck Droy to your employment process.

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  • hemicop
    replied
    Droy, congratulations! I saw this thread & was wondering.......... Food for thought (and your wife) if I may........

    Some years ago I had a friend whose son was in the local Sea Cadets Program in H.S. There he completed SEAL training during the Summer months & was accepted into Annapolis for college. His Father, having a different outlook strongly urged him against it for a variety of reasons. Now his Father I respect a lot but I think he missed the boat on this & his son came to me & asked what I thought. I told if he even had an inkling of being a SEAL he should go otherwise he'd regret it his whole life. Well, that boy is now a man in his mid-20s & every now & then we talk---and yes he DOES regret not going to Annapolis & being a SEAL and all that.
    The point is, you decided to follow something you REALLY wanted. Your wife's now on board with it. With that kind of support & commitment, hopefully it'll all work out........... Good Luck!

    Leave a comment:


  • scotty_appleton814
    replied
    ^^^What he said

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  • Traffic Man
    replied
    Glad she came around on her own. That will be a big deal if you get into Law Enforcement. ALWAYS remember that it is not just you...you MUST have the support of your spouse. You will not get rich in this profession but it is rewarding if you are called to do the job. I used to tell my trainees to remember why they got into the job. You have to have a reason to do this job other than the "status" or some bull crap like that. If you just want to do it because you think it is cool you will burn out. If you have a reason for doing the job you will be able to fall back on that during the crappy times.

    Good luck to you and your family and if you need any advise hit me up...

    Leave a comment:


  • Droy
    replied
    Hello all, and thanks for everyone's replies and advice.

    I thought I'd fill everyone in on the current situation, should they care to read and know about it.

    I am still currently at this NDT job, but am going through the hiring process for my local sheriff's department. I'll be taking the polygraph next week. My wife got tired of seeing me go out of town and never seeing me at home. And she realized how much the police thing means to me. I never pushed her into it, she came around on her own, which is good. I also updated my application with a local city department but just turned it in today so obviously haven't heard anything yet. My wife seems as excited about this new venture as I do and I'm glad to see that.

    Hope everyone is doing well and thanks again for all the advice.

    Leave a comment:


  • R31-B
    replied
    I hope all is going well with your decisions and family. I'm the spouse of an LEO and being the support and strength behind the badge isn't an easy lifestyle. My husband was not an LEO when I met him, he was a firefighter/paramedic. The money he makes now is much less, but the enjoyment and satisfaction he gets from his job is worth it. We had to scale back our lifestyle drastically, but our kids are happy, healthy, and we do what we can. Money isn't everything. Good luck.

    Leave a comment:


  • taprack2
    replied
    Psalm 37:23 (KJV)

    23*The steps of a good man are ordered by the*Lord: and he delighteth in his way.

    If you're a Christian, as I am, you believe that all of your steps are ordered by the Lord. This doesn't just apply to a career but every aspect of one's life.

    If you're not a Christian, this way of thinking seems preposterous at best.....just my .02....

    Leave a comment:


  • kfj
    replied
    This job has a high divorce rate. If she is not on board now it's going to be tougher once you get on a shift where you don't see her much. Then there is the fact she is hoping you come home at the end of shift and is worried the entire time you are at work. Add in OT, stress from the job, lifestyle changes, attitude toward life/people changes, it can be tough. If you are both not on board I would give it some time and see if she comes around. If she doesn't it may not be your destiny. No matter what job you do family has to come first, that's with any career. Good luck to you I hope it all works out for you.

    Leave a comment:


  • IAM Rand
    replied
    Originally posted by CCCSD View Post
    A religious leader or clergy member is a calling from God.

    LE is a JOB, not a calling. If you think that God told you to be a cop, you have some issues...
    I can understand what he is trying to say even if the choice of words were not the best. I never really liked police officers until I got to know then. When I did my first ride-a-long everything made sense. I knew from that point on I really needed to be a cop. Still took care of the family but, made it my priority to be a LEO.

    Leave a comment:


  • ninjamom6
    replied
    Originally posted by scuba4321 View Post
    You two need to get on the same page, either your going to blame her for "ruining your dream" or she will blame you for "following your dream."
    Droy, you said that being in LE is something you have wanted since you were a kid. Surely you discussed this with your wife before you got married? It should come as no surprise to her that you are pursuing a lifelong dream/goal. You and she both need to think about the long-term effects of this decision, as scuba pointed out.

    Leave a comment:


  • asullivan
    replied
    Originally posted by Che View Post
    Not everyone can be a doctor or astronaunt. Well thinking about it, not everyone can be a cop either. Even if you get selected, graduate #1 in your class, and pass probation. Do you think the next 30 years are easy? I have seen people quit after many years of service because this "career" can crush you and your family.

    Take an aptitude test and see if you are there or not. Good luck.


    Dat's da' reason da' Admiral say betta' ta' run than chase....


    Hook up with me, and we rob banks with my sidekick....
    Last edited by asullivan; 12-13-2014, 03:56 PM. Reason: sEcret poPo stuffy

    Leave a comment:

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