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  • My husband is a jerk!

    nevermind.................
    Last edited by BrittBSC; 09-15-2008, 11:30 PM.

    Success is getting what you want.... Happiness is wanting what you get

  • #2
    You may want to consider counseling together before embarking on your chosen career path. I smell problems ahead and divorce in the air if It's not addressed before you get to that point. That's way to big a gap in personal belief and thinking to ignore.

    Good luck

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    • #3
      I'm sorry, that was really hard to read and make sense of, and you come off as the jerk in that story.



      I concur, couple's therapy...stat.
      Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

      sigpic

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      • #4
        Find another husband. You can't change people and he will make your life miserable everday. You will not likely get much needed support from him when you come home from work after an intense encounter, a shooting, pursuit, or other significant event that affects your emotional well being.

        BTW, I think you already know this. Just want to let you know I support you in pursuing this career. Hopefully you don't have any children with him.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by BrittBSC View Post
          I commented to my husband on his lack of respect for people in uniform and he tells me that he doesn't respect people in uniform anyways.

          He knows DARN well that I hope to be an LEO one day and I have the utmost respect for police, EMT, firefighters, etc.

          I was just in shock that he could say that to me!

          He claims that in his experience all police do is interfere with the day to day life of good people!

          I responded to this that the only reason the police interfere with these "good people" is when they are breaking the law!

          If we didn't have the police the world would be a crazy place and having them is actually a good thing.

          If he didn't break the law he would never have to be around the officers, other than the friends of mine we hang out with on occasion.

          He claims that most cops he knows have issues and abuse their power. I know who he is referring to, specifically, and he's right. That certain person abuses his power all the time!!

          But just b/c their's a few bad apples doesn't mean you shouldn't respect the profession and cops as a whole, especially when you're WIFE is dead set on a carreer in LE!!!

          After a/b 10 minutes of ***** chewing he finally shut up saying he wouldn't change my mind and I couldn't change his.
          I understand that your wish to rant. My editing of your post helps me see it clearer. Does it help you at all?

          Let's pretend for a moment that you know everything you know about your husband, but you and he are not married. He's merely a very single friend, you're happily involved with someone else. You meet and befriend a woman who tells you that she is looking for a relationship with a guy who will support and encourage her dreams of one day becoming a police officer. She asks you if you know any nice guys. Would you introduce them? Would you expect romance to flourish bewteen them?

          Like many others, I don't see this situation ending well for either one of you. I'm sorry you're both in this spot. Good luck.
          Last edited by Kieth M.; 09-13-2008, 10:44 PM.
          "You're never fully dressed without a smile."

          Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.

          Three things I know for sure: (1) No bad deed goes unrewarded, (2) No good deed goes unpunished, and (3) It is entirely possible to push the most devoted, loyal and caring person beyond the point where they no longer give a 5h!t.

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          • #6
            Your profile says 21 and you say husband, your myspace says 22 and divorced

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            • #7
              i am going to have to agree with everyone else here about the counseling. being a police officer is not only a commitment by you but also your family, if your husband will not support you something has got to give whether it be your marriage or your career. find someone who is going to respect you and your decisions and you will be a lot better off.
              This is my Glock, there are many like it, but this one is mine

              "Anything is possible to he who dares" A.G. Spalding

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              • #8
                So, what movie did you see?

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                • #9
                  i don't agree with your husband's views, but I have to say one thing, he came out with his opinion, thats worth something. It would be a lot worse if he just covered up his feelings and down the road you found out the hard way this is how he feels. A+ for honesty, D for sensitivity

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                  • #10
                    You picked him, deal with it
                    "Out of every 100 men sent to battle, 10 shouldn't even be there, 80 are just targets, 9 are the real fighters, and we are lucky to have them for they make the battle. Ah, but the one, one is a Warrior and he will bring the others back." -Heraclitus

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by David Hineline View Post
                      Your profile says 21 and you say husband, your myspace says 22 and divorced
                      Actually, her profile says...

                      Divorced mother of 2, interested in pursuing a carreer in law enforcement
                      Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

                      sigpic

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                      • #12
                        Yea, I'm confused too.. it says you're divorced in your profile but you said you have a husband, did you get remarried?

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                        • #13
                          x2 - I agree with everyone here.

                          Not to sound malicious or mean, but when I was reading your post....I thought immediately the same thing, if nothing gets resolved it would lead to a very frustrating and horrible life at home if you were LEO.
                          It's already tough as it is for a lot of families when it comes to LEO/Firefighters/military etc. The reason is safety for the loved ones in that situation, but to have someone who does not understand, who is extremely ignorant and retarded in regards to those fields, if I may say....is not going to work out at all and will lead to a divorce.

                          My brother in law (wife's brother) who is close to his little sister always talks tough and has a huge lack of respect for police. He is officially labeled by me as a trendy cop hater. He visits the anti-leo web pages and uses those edited at the last minute police restraining "victim" instead of subject videos to prove his redundancy and lack of knowledge to me about ALL COPS. My wife is in full agreement with me of course and I just block it out as it would lead to me probably saying some stuff that I don't mean....lol. (I told him that one of these days, he was going to get pulled over by a police officer, mouth off and than put up resistance and fight the law.....as a prediction.)

                          I think it was thanksgiving last year at the in-laws that he showed me a video of the Utah tasing incident on the highway......that one got pretty ugly and we pretty much didn't speak with each other, even during the dinner there was some tension between us.

                          I can't imagine spending my life with some people who share this lack of respect or even knowing the importance of this job. Seriously.....I wonder how this gets into their head in the first place. Look into your "husbands" past, I bet he had a problem with authority figures before and there are some skeletons in his closet that you are unaware of from him. <---- probably criminal history or a bad experience with a LEO by his own default.

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                          • #14
                            Hi BrittBSC,

                            Just a suggestion: please lighten up, gal. Lots of nice people feel some minor antagonism and resentment toward the police and other persons in authority, especially regarding overauthoritarianism toward them about petty concerns. I trust that your fella appreciates the good work of the police, firefighters, and paramedics, who do so much to safeguard the lives and well-being of so many. I think you're right to advocate yielding promptly to emergency vehicles, but I think he's right to not want to be overly deferential. You apparently didn't marry a total jellyfish. But maybe he should lighten up a little, too. Please try to work it out with your man.

                            Regards,

                            Monty

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                            • #15
                              Thanks, everyone for your replies. I should clarify that we are divorced, it is my ex husband BUT we are back together. We have 2 kids together and have been together for 6 years. It's much easier for me to refer to him as my husband instead of my ex husband b/c it raises many questions. I have not updated my profile since I joined the forum. I was divorced and very much single at that time.

                              My post was written within 30 minutes of the incendent and I was mad when I wrote it, which is my excuse for it not being very clear. We have actually sat down and discussed why he said what he said.
                              He says that whatever I decide to do he will support me, even though he will be worried a/b me daily.
                              He expressed his views differently and at a time when I wasn't angry for what he was saying and I understand.

                              Thanks again, everyone!

                              Success is getting what you want.... Happiness is wanting what you get

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