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Finally figured the real lure of X-rated movies

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  • GangGreen712
    replied
    66) If she says "ouch!" it doesn't mean, "cut it out you crazy *******!" it means, "That's the way I like it!"
    Last edited by GangGreen712; 03-29-2009, 11:08 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • jannino
    replied
    65) Those "shots" always come out much better in movies than in person...

    I refuse to give up though. Got the wifey a bottle of Jager and gonna try again...

    Leave a comment:


  • wearsastetson
    replied
    64) "okay but I have to take the roast out in 40 minutes..."

    Leave a comment:


  • Meat_Hands
    replied
    61) In the movies, she doesn't want to cuddle and doesn't get ****ed if you just roll over and pass out.

    62) There's no "sooo....its getting a lil stale..wanna try this?" and get told to pack sand....

    63) No one ever complains if it "gets in her hair"....

    sorry..had to say it

    Leave a comment:


  • Jhelrey
    replied
    Well, since the queef one was taken....

    60. The woman never says, do not spooze on me!

    Leave a comment:


  • FiremanMike
    replied
    55. They never say "not yet, the kids JUST went to bed"
    56. The woman loves to.. "clean you off"
    57. Everyone is always perfectly groomed
    58. There's no visible half hour of prep time to
    a) Brush teeth
    b) refresh deodorant
    c) brush hair
    d) refresh perfume
    e) talk about whether we should go to the in-laws on Saturday or Sunday this week
    59. Girls are always wearing sexy underwear, even while they are cleaning, or working on the car.
    Last edited by FiremanMike; 02-25-2009, 11:40 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • 1042 Trooper
    replied
    Or this conversation:

    Drunken husband: "Geez, honey, you've suddenly become flat chested and dry....."
    Sleeping woman: "Wha?....Huh? HEY!... GET OFF MY BACK!

    Leave a comment:


  • Kieth M.
    replied
    Originally posted by Chiller View Post
    throat yogurt
    Throat yogurt?

    Do you mean Dong Malt?

    Leave a comment:


  • Chiller
    replied
    throat yogurt

    Leave a comment:


  • Smurfette_76
    replied
    Originally posted by DACP View Post
    52) You never hear the woman yell at you “Pull it out, Pull it out”
    And I bet you've never heard it either.

























    Sorry. I couldn't resist it.

    Leave a comment:


  • Jellybean400
    replied
    Originally posted by DACP View Post
    52) You never hear the woman yell at you “Pull it out, Pull it out”
    or...

    53.) "oh i KNOW you di-innnttt!!"

    Leave a comment:


  • DACP
    replied
    52) You never hear the woman yell at you “Pull it out, Pull it out”

    Leave a comment:


  • Christyle
    replied
    Originally posted by Jellybean400 View Post
    Great ones!!!

    ( 50) the 'queefs'?? LOL )

    ( 51) or pulls the covers over her head to keep the gas smell in! )

    HAHAH I hate the Q word!

    And one of my ex's was notorious to dutch oven me. Ticked me off everytime!

    Leave a comment:


  • Jellybean400
    replied
    Originally posted by Christyle View Post
    48) The woman always gets off

    50) You never hear the "air pressure noises" (that's the best way I could put it)

    51) The guy never tells the girl to put a pillow over her face, or covers her mouth, to keep her quiet.
    Great ones!!!

    ( 50) the 'queefs'?? LOL )

    ( 51) or pulls the covers over her head to keep the gas smell in! )

    Leave a comment:


  • Christyle
    replied
    48) The woman always gets off

    49) The phone doesn't ring, and if it does, no one freaks out to answer it

    50) You never hear the "air pressure noises" (that's the best way I could put it)

    51) The guy never tells the girl to put a pillow over her face, or covers her mouth, to keep her quiet.

    Leave a comment:

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