Finally figured the real lure of X-rated movies

[Jellybean400]

I see the beauty in the light AND the beauty in the dark. I even see the beauty in the ridiculous. It makes life so much more...interesting

OH - i totally agree. I love tattoos. And some of the piercings. But someone doesnt HAVE to have them to look sexy, either.

Just like i love deep-skinned Latino guys... but also my creamy-skinned Jewish boy

Beauty is everywhere

[Christyle]

48) The woman always gets off

49) The phone doesn't ring, and if it does, no one freaks out to answer it

50) You never hear the "air pressure noises" (that's the best way I could put it)

51) The guy never tells the girl to put a pillow over her face, or covers her mouth, to keep her quiet.

[Jellybean400]

48) The woman always gets off

50) You never hear the "air pressure noises" (that's the best way I could put it)

51) The guy never tells the girl to put a pillow over her face, or covers her mouth, to keep her quiet.

Great ones!!!

( 50) the 'queefs'?? LOL )

( 51) or pulls the covers over her head to keep the gas smell in! )

[Christyle]

Great ones!!!

( 50) the 'queefs'?? LOL )

( 51) or pulls the covers over her head to keep the gas smell in! )

HAHAH I hate the Q word!

And one of my ex's was notorious to dutch oven me. Ticked me off everytime!

[DACP]

52) You never hear the woman yell at you “Pull it out, Pull it out”

[Jellybean400]

52) You never hear the woman yell at you “Pull it out, Pull it out”

or...

53.) "oh i KNOW you di-innnttt!!"

[Smurfette_76]

52) You never hear the woman yell at you “Pull it out, Pull it out”

And I bet you've never heard it either.

























Sorry. I couldn't resist it.

[Chiller]

throat yogurt

[Kieth M.]

throat yogurt

Throat yogurt?

Do you mean Dong Malt?

[1042 Trooper]

Or this conversation:

Drunken husband: "Geez, honey, you've suddenly become flat chested and dry....."
Sleeping woman: "Wha?....Huh? HEY!... GET OFF MY BACK!

[FiremanMike]

55. They never say "not yet, the kids JUST went to bed"
56. The woman loves to.. "clean you off"
57. Everyone is always perfectly groomed
58. There's no visible half hour of prep time to
a) Brush teeth
b) refresh deodorant
c) brush hair
d) refresh perfume
e) talk about whether we should go to the in-laws on Saturday or Sunday this week
59. Girls are always wearing sexy underwear, even while they are cleaning, or working on the car.

[Jhelrey]

Well, since the queef one was taken....

60. The woman never says, do not spooze on me!

[Meat_Hands]

61) In the movies, she doesn't want to cuddle and doesn't get ****ed if you just roll over and pass out.

62) There's no "sooo....its getting a lil stale..wanna try this?" and get told to pack sand....

63) No one ever complains if it "gets in her hair"....

sorry..had to say it

[wearsastetson]

64) "okay but I have to take the roast out in 40 minutes..."

[jannino]

65) Those "shots" always come out much better in movies than in person...

I refuse to give up though. Got the wifey a bottle of Jager and gonna try again...