Leader

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Looking for answers........

Collapse

300x250 Mobile

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Looking for answers........

    I don't know what to do about this situation or where to turn. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 4 1/2 years. We both have been married before with kids. He has 2 kids from his first marriage. I have a good relationship with his children. Anyway, the little girl (age 11) has told me for a couple years that her mom buys alcohol for the babysitters (age 15) She has told me that the mother wants to "teach them a lesson". I have heard stories from the little girl and others about the mother giving alcohol to minors. In Nov. of last year, we found out the mother was arrested in July 07 on 2 counts of contributing to minors.There was an attempted "rape" charge that the babysitter was claiming against the mother's boyfriend. The detective opened up the case again and turned it over to Child Services. A couple days later, my boyfriends kids come over and I notice the little girl has a huge bruise across her back. We took pic of the bruises while she was sleeping. They left the next day. We called the detective and she called cs again. She called the mother to have her bring the child in, which the mother never did. CS took 10 days to go to the school to see the bruises, which we all know fade. The little girl said a tv fell on her. I had specific names and numbers of some of these teenages the mother bought alcohol for. There were even a couple of witnesses to the beating the little girl got from her mother. The police and the CS have all this info and they did not investigate it. The dect.said that the teenagers would just lie and that most of the parents already know that their kids drink. And CS said they would not investigate criminal activities. So my boyfriends kids are still in that environment. What do I do? Do I go to the Captain or someone higher up? Do I leave it alone and let it go? I just feel bad for these kids.

  • #2
    You should have called the Police and made a report about the bruising when you first noticed it and also asked the child about it....now it won't matter who you go talk to there's been too much time passed for plausible stories to have been made up. As far as the babysitters who witnessesed the beating if they had been drinking then their story isn't going to hold up in court....YOU should have been the one to get things started when you first noticed the bruising....and just for info Child Protective Services suck...don't expect the amount of help you want from them because most times you won't get it....just my experience of them here in Az

    Comment


    • #3
      Your right about calling the police at the time the child was here. We should have done that. The little girl was on the phone with her grandparents when she dropped the phone when her mother started beating her. The grandmother and grandfather heard everything. The call is on the cell bill, date and time. The little girl herself told me it was her mother. Her brother was there also. And another witness. The police had all this info and never asked for the grandparents to come in and make a statement. We have pic of the bruises with the date and time. We even have pic of the babysitters in the little girl's mom's car with drinks in there hands. The mother is still giving alcohol to these minors. The little girl told me that one guy that was there was drunk and trying to pour a shot of alcohol down her throat. I asked where was her mother, she said sleeping. You know you put your trust in the policeman because ya'll are there to serve and protect. We put our trust in the system and looked what happened. We called the det. after the kids left that day about the bruising because she had an ongoing case. And we put our trust and faith in Child Services, which was a joke. I agree with you about them not doing anything and they are suppose to be "FOR THE CHILDREN". When your faced with things and you have no clue what to do, you ask for advice. The mother has all this against her and she still keeps on doing it and the kids are put in that environment. So who do you turn too??How can you trust to take care of the children?

      Comment


      • #4
        WHy doesn't their father take her to court to get full custody? Why is he leaving his child's welfare in the hands of someone else?
        sigpic

        I don't agree with your opinion, but I respect its straightforwardness in terms of wrongness.

        Comment


        • #5
          He fought for custody in the first 3 years. It didn't go anywhere. We live in Louisiana where the "mother" is usually the domicially parent. They have joint custody. But he never gets to see them because she withholds the children. There is a court order that specifies visitation, a therapist the children are to be seeing, etc. and the mother doesn't adhere to any of them. Here in Louisiana the women need like 10 contempts for anything to happen compared to the man with 2-3. And the cost of taking her to court. He spent over $100,000 the first time. We can't afford that. The mother's father is her financial backing for all this. We thought that whenever CS got involved that things would turn around for the better, but we were wrong. Nothing happened.

          Comment


          • #6
            So go back to your lawyer. File contempt charges. Is this about money or the welfare of his children?
            sigpic

            I don't agree with your opinion, but I respect its straightforwardness in terms of wrongness.

            Comment


            • #7
              Smurfette_76, I don't know if you fully understand the "no money" aspect. Sure we want custody but you have to have 5,000 retainer, plus all the fees for court. Most of these attorneys see a case like this and they want no less than $5,000. The "free" attorneys are a joke. We even tried that route. If you don't have the funds, your screwed. We tried fighting for custody for the first 3 years, got the police involved and CS in Nov. and to no avail. If you don't have the money to fight it out in court, then what? It's easy to say what to do especially when you have never been in that situation. If we had the money, there would be no ? as to what we would do.

              Comment


              • #8
                Because I gave you an answer you didn't want to hear, you assume I haven't been in that situation.

                Okay.
                sigpic

                I don't agree with your opinion, but I respect its straightforwardness in terms of wrongness.

                Comment


                • #9
                  No, it's not that at all. I don't think you fully understand the dynamics of the situation. I couldn't put every detail in the thread. The little girl started telling about the drinking stuff a couple years back. When she told me about it, her father and I called the police and CS to ask what to do. They said you have to "catch her in the act". Well, how were we going to do that? We couldn't sit outside her house and watch her everyday. Time went on and it kept bothering me. So I called a State Tropper friend of mine and told him the situation. He got me in touch with a junvenile detective. This was in Nov of last year. That's when we found out about the arrest and rape charges.Just before Thanksgiving of last year was when the kids came over to visit. That evening I saw a big bruise on the little girls back. We took pic when she was asleep. In the am, I asked about the bruise, she said a tv fell on her. They left at 10 am. As soon as they left, we called the Det. in charge of the case. We didn't think to call a cop and report it when the child was at our house, which we should have done. We figured the det. had an ongoing case against the mother so we called her. She called CS to report it that morning and called the mother to come in, in which the mother didn't comply. The det. talked to the father and so did CS. I went in early Dec. to CS to give my information. I gave them and the det. specific names of the teenagers involved, pic of the bruises, pic of the teenagers drinking in the mother's car, and told them about the grandparents hearing the beating on the phone. NONE of the teenagers were questioned and the grandparents were never called on to give there statments. How odd? All this evidence just sitting there, no one investigating it. CS decides to prosecute the mother on criminal charges. DA was handling the case. It was looking promising until out of the blue, DA drops the case. Says there wasn't enough evidence. What? They felt they had enough to go ahead with the case. Did the mother's daddy get her out of it? There are plenty of politics here in Louisiana as elsewhere. So contrary to what you might think, we have been actively pursuring this. Again, he fought for custody the first 3 years costing alot of money, we allowed the police and CS to get involved hoping this would be it, again nothing. I don't feel that CS or the detective did all that they could do. I have heard stories about CS and I believe they don't help the children sad to say. We were trying to be the voice for the children, since they don't have a voice, but no one is hearing us. Let me pose this question, Should the detective have gone and ? these teenagers and the grandparents for there stories?

                  Comment

                  MR300x250 Tablet

                  Collapse

                  What's Going On

                  Collapse

                  There are currently 4813 users online. 293 members and 4520 guests.

                  Most users ever online was 26,947 at 07:36 PM on 12-29-2019.

                  Welcome Ad

                  Collapse
                  Working...
                  X