Leader

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

"To nice to be a cop!"

Collapse

300x250 Mobile

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • "To nice to be a cop!"

    Yeah, I hear this a lot....

    I get told this a lot when people find out that i am going out for the police career but what they don't understand is that its not that i am super nice its just that i am good at reading people by their body posture, their appearance, their attitude, and just their general look and i behave in a manner in which i know to deal with problems and such. Which is why a lot of people come to me when they have problems. However, I also don't have a problem telling it how it is. Now my question is this. Is there really a "to nice to be a cop?" (and don't confuse pushover with nice). There is a time to be firm and authoritative( / intimidating ) with certain people in the public but i don't believe its a requirement of the job 24/7.



    Rigs
    Last edited by CdtCaptRigs; 01-06-2008, 10:54 PM.
    --I work Security--

    Question: "Why Don't they give you guys guns?"
    Answer: "Because i would shoot people who ask stupid questions"

    Florida Highway Patrol

    1) PAT-Passed
    1) CJ-BAT-TBD
    3) POLYGRAPH
    4) PSYCH SCREEN
    5) MEDICAL AND VISION
    6) B I
    7) COLONEL'S DECISION
    8) JOB OFFER
    9) ACADEMY START DATE

  • #2
    I happen to be in the same boat as you. It doesn't matter if you are nice, it matters if you do your job. Am I nicer to a lot of people than most of my co-workers would be? Sure, but it doesn't mean you have to let people get away with anything. A lot of people will appreciate how you are fair and nice with them. I give people citations and end up being thanked (sincerly) when I leave.

    Example, I pulled over a guy for going 82 in a 65 during dense fog. He stated he was trying to beat the weather. I informed him the best way to beat the weather is to drive safe and get home safely. I noticed his gas tank door was open and the cap was off. I informed him and offered to close that up for him. Went back to my car, wrote him for 80 in a 65 and he thanked me and told me to have a merry christmas.

    Be nice, be fair, there is nothing wrong with that. I'm sure when you are nice to so many people and then there is that one jerk that gives you crap, you will not have any problem turning the nice off. I always think about how nice and fair I am to people, then when someone gives me crap, it makes me mad that they aren't appreciative. Works for me.

    Comment


    • #3
      I was told I was to smart to be a cop once... but that's not relevant here. I got the "to nice" thing too. Honestly I never understood what being civil ever did to undermine the law. I just treat people the way I want to be treated, I don't car whether they live in a 1.5 million dollar house or a tent in the woods. I became a cop to do something useful, that I and my family could be proud of. I give everyone the chance to make a good first impression (without compromising safety). Then we go from there.
      I didn't wake up and decide to arrest you. You made that decision. You are just some paperwork and overtime in my life.

      Comment


      • #4
        You have to give up a lot to be a cop. Just make sure your humanity isn't one of them.

        Be nice. Smile at folks. View everyone who approaches you as if they are planning to overtake you and kill you and just be planning to kill them at the same time.

        And smile the whole while!
        The All New
        2013
        BBQ and Goldfish Pond Club
        Sully - IAM Rand - JasperST - L1 - The Tick - EmmaPeel - Columbus - LA Dep - SgtSlaughter - OneAdam12 - Retired96 - Iowa #1603
        - M1Garand

        (any BBQ and Goldfish Pond member may nominate another user for membership but just remember ..... this ain't no weenie roast!)



        Comment


        • #5
          I think being "nice" gets a bad rap because some people think "nice" people can't be "mean" by citing someone, taking them to jail, or towing their car. Here is a test for that. Would you feel sorry for someone whose car you towed for 30 days because he is driving on a license suspended for DUI? I am not asking would you do it, I know you would do your job, I am asking would you feel at all sorry for the person, since you are costing them thousands of $$$, leaving them stranded and taking away their means of transportation. I don't want the defensive "of course not" answer. I am offering this as a true test, so really think about the question. (Cops please don't respond I know what we would say)

          Another concern is you wont believe that someone would want to kill you. Let me tell you this, one of the biggest disappointments for me was the overall wimpness of criminals. I wanted to hunt Hannibal Lector, I wanted to arrest the baddest of the bad, go after the kind of bad guys that you see on the big screen. I was very disappointed to learn that this kind of guy is really very rare. Someone once said there are no bad people just bad deeds. I don't quite buy into that because I think we are defined by our deeds but I think I understand what they were trying to say. I have arrested people for committing very violent crimes and in almost very instance I was surprised to see that their primary motivator was self pity. They will often start to cry and will always whine when they think they are being treated badly by us. No matter how evil their acts, the first thing they will always do, upon arrest, is cry that the handcuffs are too tight. Then you take them back to the cell and they sleep on solid cement like babies.

          The point (finally) is can you see yourself trusting no one? Because the most wimpy self pitying person is just as likely to be the one who kills a cop as the biggest bragging bad *****.

          Another thing I have noticed over the years is that super nice guys (not saying you) have a greater tendency to flame out on people. I mean get really ticked and start to scream shrilly at someone with less provocation than "meaner" cops. I am not sure why that is, maybe it's because nice guys like people more and are taken by surprise when someone makes them mad, while us "mean" cops tend to see it as the citizen acting just the way we expected. Has anyone else noticed that?
          Last edited by Garbage Man; 01-07-2008, 01:15 PM.
          Originally posted by FJDave
          GM, you have just set the bar that much higher for the rest of us in our witty, sarcastic responses. I yield to you! Good job, kind Sir!

          District B13
          "We are not cops nor Feds." yet he still poses as an officer Hmmmm


          Grant us grace, fearlessly, to contend against evil and to make no peace with oppression.--WWII memorial

          "I have loved justice and hated iniquity, therefore I die in exile."

          Pope Gregory V II

          Comment


          • #6
            Yes, by all means keep your humanity. BUT

            PLEASE BE CAREFUL

            The single common denominator in an FBI study of officers killed in the line of duty was they were known as "nice guys", "give you the shirt off his back", "didn't have a mean bone in his body", etc. etc. In fact, this is a warning sign that could lead to later problems. Please don't wave this off, and say "I know when to be tough". I have been to way too many LODD funerals already!

            From an officer safety & survival standpoint, don't let your 'nice' rep put you in a grave. You can be nice, be firm, and STILL have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

            And ask yourself - could the last person I talked to have killed me? When was the last time I got some serious officer survival training?

            I want to keep your names off that wall in Washington, D.C.
            "A man who has nothing which he cares about more than he does about his personal safety is a miserable creature who has no chance of being free, unless made and kept so by the existing of better men than himself."
            John Stuart Mill

            Comment


            • #7
              Being nice is not a bad attribute, but just know the games that criminals play.
              "An officer has the confidence to stand alone, the courage to make tough decisions, and the compassion to listen to the needs of others. He does not set out to be a leader, but becomes one by the quality of his actions and the integrity of his intent."

              Comment


              • #8
                When you give someone a warning or sell the ticket well they will be happy.
                The real challenge comes after you bounce a suspects face off of the concrete and he thanks you.
                THAT my friend is real skills.
                Make the world a better place....punch a hippie in the face.

                Be polite to everyone but be ready to kill them at a moments notice.

                Former 11B3P, airborne!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Sleuth View Post
                  Yes, by all means keep your humanity. BUT

                  PLEASE BE CAREFUL

                  The single common denominator in an FBI study of officers killed in the line of duty was they were known as "nice guys", "give you the shirt off his back", "didn't have a mean bone in his body", etc. etc. In fact, this is a warning sign that could lead to later problems. Please don't wave this off, and say "I know when to be tough". I have been to way too many LODD funerals already!

                  From an officer safety & survival standpoint, don't let your 'nice' rep put you in a grave. You can be nice, be firm, and STILL have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

                  And ask yourself - could the last person I talked to have killed me? When was the last time I got some serious officer survival training?

                  I want to keep your names off that wall in Washington, D.C.
                  Great post.
                  Make the world a better place....punch a hippie in the face.

                  Be polite to everyone but be ready to kill them at a moments notice.

                  Former 11B3P, airborne!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Sleuth View Post
                    Yes, by all means keep your humanity. BUT

                    PLEASE BE CAREFUL

                    The single common denominator in an FBI study of officers killed in the line of duty was they were known as "nice guys", "give you the shirt off his back", "didn't have a mean bone in his body", etc. etc. In fact, this is a warning sign that could lead to later problems. Please don't wave this off, and say "I know when to be tough". I have been to way too many LODD funerals already!

                    From an officer safety & survival standpoint, don't let your 'nice' rep put you in a grave. You can be nice, be firm, and STILL have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

                    And ask yourself - could the last person I talked to have killed me? When was the last time I got some serious officer survival training?

                    I want to keep your names off that wall in Washington, D.C.

                    AWESOME!
                    - Chesapeake Police Dept, VA -
                    Applied: 10/15/07
                    Written Exam: 12/08/07 - Passed
                    Physical Agility Test: 12/08/07 - Passed
                    Background Investigation: Packet Turned in 12/15/07

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      "Be nice, until it's time to not be nice." Dalton, poetic bouncer.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        First off, Thank you for the great responses on this post. It is really appreciated and i take both negative and positive remarks as a learning experience.


                        QUESTION: "Here is a test for that. Would you feel sorry for someone whose car you towed for 30 days because he is driving on a license suspended for DUI? I am not asking would you do it, I know you would do your job, I am asking would you feel at all sorry for the person, since you are costing them thousands of $$$, leaving them stranded and taking away their means of transportation. I don't want the defensive "of course not" answer. I am offering this as a true test, so really think about the question. (Cops please don't respond I know what we would say)"-Garbage Man


                        Response: Honestly, Yes i would feel a hint of sorry for them. However what i don't feel sorry for are all the lives he risked when he drove while under the influence. This was his punishment which in all honestly i believe is not enough. In this situation this man previously endangered the lives of hundreds of people on the road and in this i don't feel sorry for him. So if he decides to violate his Less then Adequate sentence then by all means my pity for him is not going to alter me doing my job. So to elaborate on my response, I will feel a small amount of pity but the pity i feel is from his lack of common sense.
                        Last edited by CdtCaptRigs; 01-08-2008, 12:53 AM.
                        --I work Security--

                        Question: "Why Don't they give you guys guns?"
                        Answer: "Because i would shoot people who ask stupid questions"

                        Florida Highway Patrol

                        1) PAT-Passed
                        1) CJ-BAT-TBD
                        3) POLYGRAPH
                        4) PSYCH SCREEN
                        5) MEDICAL AND VISION
                        6) B I
                        7) COLONEL'S DECISION
                        8) JOB OFFER
                        9) ACADEMY START DATE

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Honestly, if you don't have some empathy for even the most f***ed up people you deal with, then you probably have some socialization problems of your own.

                          That doesn't mean that you don't treat them the way they needed to be treated for your own and their safety. There is a difference in being tough and being an *******, and you can be unrelentingly firm, and polite, at the same time.

                          I have found that being polite, even to people you have just slammed to the ground, or otherwise handled, is more effective than being impolite.

                          I have always read that study of cop killers as meaning that they kill officers they think they can kill and get away with it. Being nice alone, would not be something that would necessarily trigger that in my opinion. You can be an *******, and still look like somebody who could be taken, easily and in fact we, as police, encounter that very type all day.

                          I've dealt with guys I knew who had done time for murder, who were exceedingly polite. It sure didn't make me think they wouldn't kill me or someone else given half the chance.

                          I guess my point is, being nice or not, is one small component in your demeanor and personality. Important, but not necessarily the determining factor in anything.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            As to the games crooks play ---- they are always inventing new ones.

                            An MS13 and the terrorists all try to blend in.

                            I never said don't be polite. I always was, and got to testify in court:
                            What did you call the defendant?
                            Sir
                            What did he call you?
                            *&$%#@$%^ - And your mother too!

                            Nice effect on the jury & judge
                            "A man who has nothing which he cares about more than he does about his personal safety is a miserable creature who has no chance of being free, unless made and kept so by the existing of better men than himself."
                            John Stuart Mill

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by CdtCaptRigs View Post
                              First off, Thank you for the great responses on this post. It is really appreciated and i take both negative and positive remarks as a learning experience.


                              QUESTION: "Here is a test for that. Would you feel sorry for someone whose car you towed for 30 days because he is driving on a license suspended for DUI? I am not asking would you do it, I know you would do your job, I am asking would you feel at all sorry for the person, since you are costing them thousands of $$$, leaving them stranded and taking away their means of transportation. I don't want the defensive "of course not" answer. I am offering this as a true test, so really think about the question. (Cops please don't respond I know what we would say)"-Garbage Man


                              Response: Honestly, Yes i would feel a hint of sorry for them. However what i don't feel sorry for are all the lives he risked when he drove while under the influence. This was his punishment which in all honestly i believe is not enough. In this situation this man previously endangered the lives of hundreds of people on the road and in this i don't feel sorry for him. So if he decides to violate his Less then Adequate sentence then by all means my pity for him is not going to alter me doing my job. So to elaborate on my response, I will feel a small amount of pity but the pity i feel is from his lack of common sense.
                              Your answer shows me that you have guessed the correct answer is "No! Screw em!" That may sound harsh but at some point you have to realize that a large part of our job is assiting stupid people in the process of ruining their lives. Some people are human train wrecks and you will meet more f-ups than you thought the planet could hold after your first shift. People who like people find it dificult to deal with a cops reality. They burn out and start to get bitter. I have plenty of sympathy for the people who come into my world through no fault of their own. I have no patience for those who are the root cause of their problems. I dont feel sorry for alcoholics or drug addicts or anyone of those people who have a "sickness."

                              My motto is that I have nothing but sympathy for those who deserve it and for those who dont, I have nothing.

                              None of this has anything to do with how you act towards people. I am talking about how you feel inside. I have agreed with rapists that the girl really wanted it, child molesters that they are the real victims, robbers that they deserve to have what they take, and all with a genuine smile as I calculate how many years I am stealing from this guys life. If you met me you would think I was you, even nicer than you, but I know what is in my heart, and they never will. I have had people whom I screwed as much as the law allowed who have called me up years later to become an informant because I was the only one who really felt sorry for them.
                              Last edited by Garbage Man; 01-08-2008, 10:01 PM.
                              Originally posted by FJDave
                              GM, you have just set the bar that much higher for the rest of us in our witty, sarcastic responses. I yield to you! Good job, kind Sir!

                              District B13
                              "We are not cops nor Feds." yet he still poses as an officer Hmmmm


                              Grant us grace, fearlessly, to contend against evil and to make no peace with oppression.--WWII memorial

                              "I have loved justice and hated iniquity, therefore I die in exile."

                              Pope Gregory V II

                              Comment

                              MR300x250 Tablet

                              Collapse

                              What's Going On

                              Collapse

                              There are currently 3690 users online. 215 members and 3475 guests.

                              Most users ever online was 158,966 at 04:57 AM on 01-16-2021.

                              Welcome Ad

                              Collapse
                              Working...
                              X