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  • Invasion of Privacy?

    Hey guys, this is a serious question, I prefer LEO responses only.

    I am 19 years old, I live with my mother and father. I have lived here for a little over 6 months. I have a locking doorknob on mine/my fiance's room. Recently she has been getting really upset with me over job situations. I am trying to decide if I want to go to college, and work PT jobs until I can get into the academy for either PD or CDC, or if I want to join the Navy. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place because she wants me out quick. I really want to be CDC but I have to wait a year and a half before I can even go through the academy. Now she is telling me that she wants the doorknob removed from my door, and/or replaced by a normal, non-locking doorknob. She threatened that if I didnt remove it, she would remove it herself. Now, she's not doing this because she thinks somethings going on, she's doing it because she wants to **** me off. She has NO REASON to believe anything odd/illegal is going on, and there isnt. Half of the time our door is open anyway. Now if she does decide to take the lock off my door, because I have established residence, isn't that an invasion of mine/my fiance's privacy? Also, she thinks she can kick me out without a 30 day notice, is that true? Beyond that, just so you guys know its not only me, I can recall several times she's shoved me, punched me (in the face, neck, back, and chest), screamed at me, hit me with whatever was within her reach (wooden spoons, remotes, butter knives). I admit that I've done some wrong, I'm not an angel. I'm just trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. While I'm not the most thoughtful person in the world, she seems to think that hitting me will help my situation. I don't want to go to the police, because I dont want to have anything bad happen to her and I'm pretty sure hitting your 19 year old son and leaving marks is enough to at least be booked, and locked up for at least a few days. I just want to get the facts on whether or not she can do that with my doorknob. I thank you guys for your help, and I'de appreciate LEO responses only, and only ON SUBJECT responses. I appreciate your help.


    Rob

  • #2
    Privacy?

    Rob, are you paying rent yet? If not, move out cause it ain't gonna get better. It's not your house, so you gotta play by her rules about the lock. As for getting, thats another choice you have.
    Jerry
    "If all else fails, stop using all else!"

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    • #3
      Mom's house and she can do what she wants with it. That didn't change when you turned 18.
      Two people can keep a secret if one of them is dead.

      Comment


      • #4
        Rob,
        Just weather the storm till you can get on your feet and move out. Just be thankful you have a place to stay. Legally, mom is not doing anything wrong. I understand she is not very easy to live with though...
        Retired 02/01/13

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        • #5
          http://www.navy.com/
          "Respect for religion must be reestablished. Public debt should be reduced. The arrogance of public officials must be curtailed. Assistance to foreign lands must be stopped or we shall bankrupt ourselves. The people should be forced to work and not depend on government for subsistence." - Cicero, 60 B.C.

          For California police academy notes go to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/CABasicPolice/

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          • #6
            **FORMER LEO*

            i have to disagree, as usual i guess okla is against the norm. if two adults live in a house, even if only a verbable agreement, no rent, you still are a tenant. never ran into quite the same situation, but here, no she cant just evict you and you could try to file against her for breaking into your room, because that is your space, BUT THAT WOULD MAKE THINGS WORSE, plus i think you would have a hard time getting a DA to file it. i know $ is tight, believe me, but you need to move out. for one, if you are about to get married, its not good to still be in the nest. example- if police showed up and wanted to search your room for dope, and your not there, and she gives consent, even if they found 1 million lbs marijuana and 50 dead bodies, illegal search, case over. but again i think it would be a BAD IDEA.

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            • #7
              privacy

              You've got to be new at this......citing law to an obvious "grow up" situation.
              Jerry
              "If all else fails, stop using all else!"

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              • #8
                no, i just found it interesting that the other states had no laws about this, i did tell him to grow up, not so many words, but get out of the nest.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by gotthblues
                  **FORMER LEO*

                  i have to disagree, as usual i guess okla is against the norm. if two adults live in a house, even if only a verbable agreement, no rent, you still are a tenant. never ran into quite the same situation, but here, no she cant just evict you and you could try to file against her for breaking into your room, because that is your space, BUT THAT WOULD MAKE THINGS WORSE, plus i think you would have a hard time getting a DA to file it. i know $ is tight, believe me, but you need to move out. for one, if you are about to get married, its not good to still be in the nest. example- if police showed up and wanted to search your room for dope, and your not there, and she gives consent, even if they found 1 million lbs marijuana and 50 dead bodies, illegal search, case over. but again i think it would be a BAD IDEA.
                  Dude - No way could One Million LBS of Marijuana fit in one room...


                  Just kidding.... I get your point
                  Retired 02/01/13

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                  • #10
                    I agree with Gotthblues regarding the police search...

                    However, my advise is this: Just do what ever makes your mother happy so that she gets off you back. She would have to formally evict you through the courts, which would take a long time. If you are not willing to please you mother, then move out, you got it good right now. Sorry for getting sappy on you, but she is the only mother you have, you are still young, don't ruin the mother/son relationship for the rest of you life.

                    On the other hand, If you do ever make a police report, please, please, dont say:
                    Originally posted by Rbadgett
                    Beyond that, just so you guys know its not only me, I can recall several times she's shoved me, punched me (in the face, neck, back, and chest), screamed at me, hit me with whatever was within her reach (wooden spoons, remotes, butter knives).
                    I hate it when people bring up past incidents. I'm here to take a report on what happened TODAY, not three weeks ago. Should have called the police then.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      In my parts the living situation would be a civil matter and we would not get involved expect to mediate. On that note, time to fly the coupe young sparrow.

                      Really, get a full time job and a studio apartment until you figure out what your going to do. What kind of future do you have for your fiance if you are still 19 and living at home?

                      She is still your mother and will be your mother forever, no matter if your 9 or 19. She will not see you as an adult, especially if you are living at home. Honestly, it is a freaken miracle she is allowing a woman to stay in your room with you, may just be ****ing her off a little.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by gotthblues
                        **FORMER LEO*

                        i have to disagree, as usual i guess okla is against the norm. if two adults live in a house, even if only a verbable agreement, no rent, you still are a tenant. never ran into quite the same situation, but here, no she cant just evict you...
                        She can evict him, she just has to do it legally (in OK).

                        you could try to file against her for breaking into your room, because that is your space, BUT THAT WOULD MAKE THINGS WORSE, plus i think you would have a hard time getting a DA to file it.
                        He would be very hard pressed to find a cop that wouldn't laugh in his face much less actually file charges. This is a civil/family matter.

                        example- if police showed up and wanted to search your room for dope, and your not there, and she gives consent, even if they found 1 million lbs marijuana and 50 dead bodies, illegal search, case over.
                        True, but I believe this was a SCOTUS ruling or at least a 10th circuit ruling not something exclusive to OK. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.
                        Two people can keep a secret if one of them is dead.

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                        • #13
                          CHEIF WIG- my mistake, i ment to say that she could not just kick him out, she has to evict him,,,,,like i said, i m from okleehomea,, sometimes i get confuzzed.

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                          • #14
                            Not in SC. He does not pay rent or have a written lease. She can bounce his butt out of the house anytime she feels like it with the only notice being told to leave or finding his stuff on the street in front of the house. Sorry kid, you need to go in the military service and forget about being a cop until after then. You need to learn many things and how to control your own life before you even think about controlling others lives.

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                            • #15
                              Invasion of Privacy.

                              Perhaps not as a matter of law, but of fact. The only place you have a reasonable expectation of privacy is your own place. Yours in the sense you either rent or own. Law aside, you need to get out of there. If it's "Mom's place, Mom makes the rules. Your place, you make them. End of sermon.

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