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Dealing With A Psychopath ?

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  • Dealing With A Psychopath ?

    I have searched the web & this forum for info. I've found lots of info describing what a psychopath/sociopath is. Most advice I've read on dealing with them is just to steer clear or get away. Social Svcs side will suggest get restraining order & go to counseling, etc; which I would agree with in most cases when physical assault or child abuse is involved. Physical assault cases at least have some evidence so charges can be filed etc.

    I am a counselor & do have quite a bit experience in this area of dysfunctional relationships & domestic issues. However I also realize there appears to be differing degrees or rather ways of acting out the inappropriate behavior by these psychopaths. This behavior can range anywhere from the nonviolent to the well known serial killers we hear of.

    But, I believe most of the in between cases are the ones we do not hear about until after the crime is committed. The psychopath kills his mark when they are no longer cooperative. Many of these are murder/suicides. Often you hear what good guys (or gals) these folks were & people seem surprised that they "just snapped" or then everyone has a story about the warning signs they saw beforehand.

    There seems to be more of this going on than ever before along with sexual predators which I personally believe are interrelated.

    So what do victims do when no crime has YET been committed and/or there is no evidence that LE or the court can act upon, yet people are being threatened? So if you could expound on your thoughts, opinions, experiences would be appreciated. What would you tell a victim if you had a chance before you were called to the scene of their murder? Note: I am not addressing the stereotypical domestics where the abused female never wants to press charges & won't leave. I would like to know more about the cases where folks try to end contact with someone they see as dysfunctional & are stalked & threatened.

    Are there any resources for folks dealing with something like I've described? I know most counselors do not have any expertise in working with real psychopaths or their victims.

  • #2
    your post confuses me a little....if people are being threatened then that is a crime....if people are being stalked, that is also a crime....

    orders of protection are usually used as a tool for victims of domestic violence...but i've seen them used in other cases such as a recovering alcoholic son wants no contact with his father who is also an alcoholic because the son views the father as a destructive force in his life....

    i've never heard of any sort of stalking or anything that wasn't domestic related (to include boyfriend/girlfriend stuff especially when children are involved)...

    unfortunately thats the way our legal system works...no one can predict the future and because of that, people cannot be jailed for crimes you think they are going to commit.....

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    • #3
      Look for battered women's shelters and victims advocates. These resources would probably be the best help in your situation.

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      • #4
        If they are being threatened, it's a crime. If you're talking about veiled threats, I'd say they need a good support system of friends and family, shelters and advocates as mentioned above, and if they work, let their boss know that they are concerned for their own safety because of X. If the company has a security dept., let them know as well and provide the necessary details. Don't buy a weapon unless you have been trained in its use and are willing to use it.

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        • #5
          This has to do with someone I work with. There have been direct death threats & the means exists to carry this out as well as the stalker has made it quite clear he has nothing to lose. This & many other things have been reported by the victim but there is no evidence to prove it. There has been no physical violence resulting in injury. Women's shelter cannot help unless the victim is willing to file for restraining order. There is no evidence of anything to justify a restraining order. Social services is aware of issues & reported to local PD a request for well person ck after alleged perp made suicide threat on ph to soc. svcs. Local PD failed to respond as "required by law", told victim "Call us if he shoots you or himself"? I overheard this on the phone myself but no proof. This was only report to LE during client's probs with ex. Other than the alleged suicide threat perp has committed no crime/no evidence.

          So, what if, LE & Soc Svc knows this guy, believes he is a psychopath & will not confront without overkill backup & cannot because the crime has not yet occurred. I just do not know what to tell someone in this situation.

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          • #6
            Victim does not live with stalker. She cannot afford to disappear out of state & she has family in the area but they do not believe her that guy is so bad.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by mommajane View Post
              This has to do with someone I work with. There have been direct death threats & the means exists to carry this out as well as the stalker has made it quite clear he has nothing to lose. This & many other things have been reported by the victim but there is no evidence to prove it. There has been no physical violence resulting in injury. Women's shelter cannot help unless the victim is willing to file for restraining order. There is no evidence of anything to justify a restraining order. Social services is aware of issues & reported to local PD a request for well person ck after alleged perp made suicide threat on ph to soc. svcs. Local PD failed to respond as "required by law", told victim "Call us if he shoots you or himself"? I overheard this on the phone myself but no proof. This was only report to LE during client's probs with ex. Other than the alleged suicide threat perp has committed no crime/no evidence.

              So, what if, LE & Soc Svc knows this guy, believes he is a psychopath & will not confront without overkill backup & cannot because the crime has not yet occurred. I just do not know what to tell someone in this situation.
              We're bound by the very law we enforce. You should also know that it's encumbent on the intended "victim" to take certain reasonable steps to protect himself. As has been noted, stalking is a crime, as is making threats, or harrasing another person. The "victim" is the person who must report these incidents. OTH, if no crime has been committed, no threat(s), no harrassment taken place, there is no action the police can take.

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              • #8
                Your post contradicts itself. If she has been threatened with death, there has been a crime. What things have been reported and to who? Talk to your local prosecutor about charges and a restraining order. There aren't too many agencies that don't have a 24/7 recording of everything that is said on the phone, so it would be easy enough to check on the "If he shoots you call us" response.

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                • #9
                  In NY, you can go to the Supreme Court, Mental Health Part, and petition the court that the person in question is a danger to himself or others. The judge can issue a warrant for the subject and hold a competency hearing to determine if the person requires professional psychiatric observation and help. If the judge does determine this person is a danger he can commit the person for help.
                  “Every society gets the kind of criminal it deserves. What is equally true is that every community gets the kind of law enforcement it insists on.” - Robert F. Kennedy.

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                  • #10
                    Read Without Conscience: The Disturbing World of The Psychopaths Among Us. Written by Robert D. Hare, PHD, it's a very well written book.

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                    • #11
                      momma- what city and/or county are you in Missouri??
                      "I don't go on "I'maworthlesscumdumpster.com" and post negative **** about cum dumpsters."
                      The Tick

                      "Are you referring to the secret headquarters of a fictional crime fighter or penal complex slang for a-$$hole, anus or rectum?"
                      sanitizer

                      "and we all know you are a poser and a p*ssy.... "
                      Bearcat357 to Dinner Portion/buck8/long relief

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by mommajane View Post
                        There have been direct death threats & the means exists to carry this out as well as the stalker has made it quite clear he has nothing to lose. This & many other things have been reported by the victim but there is no evidence to prove it. There has been no physical violence resulting in injury. Women's shelter cannot help unless the victim is willing to file for restraining order. There is no evidence of anything to justify a restraining order.
                        Sworn testimony IS evidence and in most cases more than enough to obtain an 'ex parte' protective/restraining order. I think the issue is highlighted in bold above.

                        Why is the victim not filing? If 'direct' threats have been made, there's plenty of evidence to obtain the order.
                        sigpic
                        Our houses are protected by the good Lord and a gun.
                        And you might meet 'em both if you show up here not welcome son.

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                        • #13
                          In my state, if someone willfully threatens to commit a crime which will result in death or great bodily injury to another person, even if there is no intent of actually carrying it out, and the circumstances in which it is made, are so unequivocal, unconditional, immediate, and specific as to cause the person threatened to reasonably be in sustained fear for his or her own safety or for his or her immediate family's safety, then a felony has been committed.

                          I am going to bet that your state has a similar law.
                          Going too far is half the pleasure of not getting anywhere

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by crass cop View Post
                            momma- what city and/or county are you in Missouri??
                            Would rather not say as I have already noted I don't think LE has been as helpful as they could be to the situation. Would like to say in their behalf they may know more about alleged perp than I do "legally", although I'm sure I know what's going on psychologically.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by mommajane View Post
                              Would rather not say as I have already noted I don't think LE has been as helpful as they could be to the situation. Would like to say in their behalf they may know more about alleged perp than I do "legally", although I'm sure I know what's going on psychologically.
                              It always seems fashionable to blame the cops,and say they're not being as helpful as they could be. You've been given some very good advice on this thread, and it's YOUR responsibility to act on it, if you feel the problem is that serious. As I noted in a previous reply, we are bound by the law in the same manner as any other entity, and "legal" has to be a serious consideration for a LE agency.The Police are not the solution to all of society's problems. Since you're certain you know more about what's going on psychologically,then implement some of the suggestions which have been advanced in this thread. And, should the situation go south, as well it could, please don't blame it on the cops.

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