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My sticker


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  • My sticker

    A few weeks ago on our Friday (Monday in the early AM) we were sitting at the 24 hours Denny's. Enjoying a well deserved breakfast of fluffy pancakes with maple syrup, and some bacon. It was the last day of our three 12 hour shifts and quite frankly we were dog tired.

    Alex is savoring a peice of ham when he gets nailed.

    "Headquarters to India 17, 10-65. 85S [Shooting] at Florida Hospital East, 56 with Javier in the ER. Just 10-14 Orange County is sending three deputies for crowd control."

    WHAM. No breakfast for joo

    The rest of the squad laughs at him. We did laugh, but we also paid our bills and went emergency style out there. That particular hospital isn't in the city, but apparently the shooting happened in the city. We show up 4 deep and half a squad of Orange County shows up too. Apparently the large angry crowd was a figment of someones imagination. The shooting was not.

    There was about 10 people in front of the ER, friends and family of the victims. They certainly weren't causing a problem and seemed quite unconcerned about their loved ones being turned into swiss cheese.

    It looks like a weak sister to begin with. A Group of club goers gets into an argument with another group on the west side of town at a Latino club. They seperate. As our two unwary victims leave, Bad Guys start chasing them. Rounds are fired from knucklehead hanging out the window of his car. A couple of rounds hit our victims and a couple hit their SUV. One guy takes a round through the arm and upper body, another takes a round in the neck and somewhere else non vital. What do they do after this violent act?

    Do they stop and call 911?
    Do they drive to the nearest hospital a mile from where they are?
    Do they go to ORMC the level 1 Trauma Center?


    They drive 15-20 miles across town to a dinky little hospital as their friend is bleeding out. Riiiiight.

    And the real fun part is the call was held for over an hour.

    Don't get shot in Orlando because, hey you will get a cop. We just can't promise when he'll arrive. Apparently dispatch miscoded the call. The entire family of the two guys has show up, along with friends. Now Good ole Alex may have gotten slimed but he certainly wasn't going to take this alone. Especially since the hospital isn't even near our sector, and the actually scene was three sectors west. You slime one of us, you slime all of us.

    The story of the shooting changes when you ask the different victims. Their girlfriends each provide seperate stories that don't match up with anything. The location of the shooting changes with each person asked. Time to whip out the old sworn written statements and start locking these lying mother****ers into their stories. We've now established no one involved is a real victim. Real victims want the police to catch the person that shot them, they cooperate, and tell the truth.

    In the back of the ER I notice a plastic holder with stickers for little kids. Looks interesting. I paw through them and find this one:

    Awww a cute little sticker for the kids that have to get a shot.

    I couldn't help myself. I took my pen out and crossed of the "A." So it read "I got shot."

    I think this is about the funniest thing ever. I crack myself up. I proudly show my sticker to all the ER nurses, the other cops, and the deputies. I put complete and total faith in the fact that normal people do not pay attention to detail. I interviewed a witness, the two girlfriends, and talked to the family while wearing this neon green sticker. I made sure to talk to the victims too. I was snickering the whole time.

    No one said a word.

    I never got complained on either. I wore the sticker for about 2-3 hours until sadly it stopped being adhesive.

    Was that wrong? Maybe

    Was it funny? Definately

    Do I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old and need a psych eval? Quite possibely.

    What's the worst they can do to me, send me to midnight patrol! You really have to enjoy the little things in life!
    Last edited by davidh304; 07-23-2005, 02:59 PM.
    I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

    "Why didn't you put that out on the radio?"
    "I don't know Sarge, I guess I got caught up in the moment"
    "The MOMENT is when we F--king need you!" - K-9 Sgt Myhre to unidentified Officer

    In Valor there is Hope

  • #2
    Heheehee, good stuff. Thanks, I needed that after this lousy day.
    "He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still"

    -Lao Tzu

    "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

    -Reinhold Niebuhr


    • #3
      That's great. I love how non-observant people are.


      • #4
        Glorious hillarity! It is amazing what people don't notice when it is right in front of them.
        Last edited by badger; 07-27-2005, 07:32 AM. Reason: spelling
        " (T)o preserve liberty, it is essential that the whole body of the people always possess arms, and be taught alike, especially when young, how to use them.... " Richard Henry Lee, 1788


        • #5
          haha awesome.. Glad to see you have a good sense of humor!


          • #6
            I went to work one day threw on the uniform shirt and realized I left my Badge at home. I Checked the other lockers for one to borrow and could not find one. It was midnight shift so I went into the Bike patrol locker room to look and found a box of sticker badges they give to kids and slapped it on. I made it thru Roll call and half the shift before My SGT noticed. When I told him how long I had it on he just laughed and gave me one of his spares
            Last edited by Ballen0351; 07-26-2005, 07:05 PM.
            Quick throw me your cuffs I already used all of mine
            Come here Slick Im not done with you yet


            • #7
              We had a guy come in with a shirt he had just gotten from supply recently. He had it cleaned and wore it.

              He's in lineup and our lieutenant dropped in that day.

              After about 2 minutes, he asks the squad "ok what's wrong with that uniform?"

              He gets only blank stares in response.

              It was missing patches and none of us caught it.
              I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

              "Why didn't you put that out on the radio?"
              "I don't know Sarge, I guess I got caught up in the moment"
              "The MOMENT is when we F--king need you!" - K-9 Sgt Myhre to unidentified Officer

              In Valor there is Hope


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