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  • Any of You Guys

    Let the fatalities get to you? 16 years and I have seen quit a few. What do you do to cope with the experience. I just block it out, and resume business as usual approach. If you have, and need someone to talk to, let me know. I may be able to help.

  • #2
    I take your approach as well, block it out and keep on keepin on. Doesn't really bother me seeing the nasty stuff.

    I'm not a big fan of death notifications though...those suck.

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    • #3
      It depends on your POV. I think everyone should talk to a professional and your department should pick up the tab.

      My POV is everyone is going to die eventually. But it is sad when the victim is a child.

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      • #4
        20 years in EMS before coming to LE almost 6 years ago. I've seen a LOT of death and human suffering. There isn't much that really gets to me except for kids. That being said, the hardest thing I've ever done was waking up 2 parents to tell them that their son had been killed in a car accident and wasn't coming home.

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        • #5
          You guys said it. The corpse doesn't bother me one bit. It's the living relatives of that corpse that I dread. Haven't had to deal with a dead child yet though. I have a feeling that one is gonna be different.

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          • #6
            The kids are the worst. Of course unbelievably wealthy spouses who wake up and find hubby dead can be a different kind of bad. Especially when they make very suspicious statements to 911 (due strictly to their shock/true lack of knowledge).

            I second death notifications. Nothing beats a kick to the gut when you tell mom and dad their pride and joy is dead on the other side of the country.

            Our department is finally getting the Critical Incident Stress Management Debrief implemented. That helped after our last child death (big rig vs bicycle).
            semper destravit

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            • #7
              we do CISMs here...
              still gets to me?? depends on the situation
              "I don't go on "I'maworthlesscumdumpster.com" and post negative **** about cum dumpsters."
              The Tick

              "Are you referring to the secret headquarters of a fictional crime fighter or penal complex slang for a-$$hole, anus or rectum?"
              sanitizer

              "and we all know you are a poser and a p*ssy.... "
              Bearcat357 to Dinner Portion/buck8/long relief

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              • #8
                Originally posted by allen_gamble View Post
                You guys said it. The corpse doesn't bother me one bit. It's the living relatives of that corpse that I dread. Haven't had to deal with a dead child yet though. I have a feeling that one is gonna be different.
                Same with me

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                • #9
                  Fresh deaths like gunshot victims don't bother me, Bodies that have been in decomp for any period of time to when they start to smell are my weakness. I made one last year that the guy had been decomposing in his room in a crowded shelter for over 4 weeks and no one though to go check on him. He was in full bloat when we got the run, the image of that one is still fresh in my head. As with everyone else who replied, The kids are bad ones. I Made a fatal DUI involving an infant that made me understand the "your not a cop until you taste them" for the first time, and also made me more serious on DUI enforcement. Also My agency is not responsible for death notifications.
                  "Its not what you know, its what you can prove."-Training Day

                  "Game on, bitches. Whoop whoop, flash the lights, pull it over."

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                  • #10
                    None of it bothers me. Dead meat is dead meat. It's not people after its dead.

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                    • #11
                      By remembering the live ones. One accident victim in particular is my "go-to" memory. She shouldn't have lived, but she did. We prayed together as the FD cut her car off of her piece by piece. I didn't do anything but hold her hand and pray. But Christ said "where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there in their midst". When I heard her say "help me, Jesus!" - I knew the only thing I could do. So I remember the time I saw Christ's goodness at work, and the bad stuff washes away.

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                      • #12
                        Sometimes it does get to me, especially when children are involved. I go to my church and set in the solitude and turn it allover to God. Quite often a few tears and a talk with my priest are involved as well.
                        In God We Trust
                        Everyone else we run local and NCIC

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                        • #13
                          For what ever reason I never really remember things I do or see on the job. I know I have seen some crazy things, funny things, Horrific things, and so on but I don't really remember them except for a select few incidents. As far as actually being at the scene and seeing horrific things it has never really bothered me. I do not enjoy it but I just view it as I have a job to do and I will do what I need too. When I go to a fatality and i am not the primary Officer I never go look at the victim and have zero desire too. I never understood those people that want to see the blood and guts.

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                          • #14
                            Supervisors at my department have to go to all death calls. I have seen more than enough of them to last several life times. I had to do a death notification during Thanksgiving to a sister who had called in a welfare check on her brother. She wanted to know if he died peacefully. I told her he died in his bed.

                            The worst three all involve teenagers. One committed suicide in front of me and my partner. He put the gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger. He lived for a few minutes after and was screaming, "No!" the whole time while spitting blood up everywhere. That was a very tough day for all of us. We all were sent home by the Chief and sent to talk to a shrink. The other two guys got off of LE shortly after.

                            The second one was killed in a crash. I arrived right after it happened and crawled in the car with him. He asked me if he was going to be ok and I told him yes, we talked till the ambulance arrived. He died right after they arrived.

                            The third one was a car crash on Christmas Eve. He was leaving the mall, driving like a bat of of hell and hit a tree at 94 MPH. My partner arrived as he took his last breath. The crash debris covered 200 yards.


                            I have been on the job since 92
                            Geaux Tigers

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                            • #15
                              20 years and many, many, many bodies. Some fresh, some in advanced decomp.
                              I've even had a guy shoot himself in the head in front of me- no issues that I know of, but...
                              In 2012 I ( and other investigators) investigated a mass murder of 6 people. One was an infant- stomped to death; with a boot print evident on his little head. That was the roughest.
                              The killers are Zakawanda Moss and Henry Burrell, if you are interested (google it) both are serving multiple life sentences. Burrell killed the infant.
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