Leader

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Balancing Work and Home

Collapse

300x250 Mobile

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Balancing Work and Home

    Hey Everyone,
    I'm currently a candidate for CPD, and with the hiring process moving along so "quickly", I'm beginning to get a bit nervous regarding how working as a police officer will affect my family life. I knew it'd be different but will it be drastically different? A little background... I have three kids (one pre-teen and two teens), I currently work a 9-5 weekends off, and we live in the burbs. I grew up in Chicago but left about 12 years ago, so my kids grew up in the burbs. My kids are used to me being home at a certain time and I'm always with them on Holidays. I know my schedule will be basically turned upside down but but how by how much? Will I be able to get any holiday's off? What are typical work hours/days? Is it hard to request a day off (kids birthdays)? Not to mention, we'll have to move back to the city, which is an entirely different post. Maybe I'm overthinking things but any advice on this will be much appreciated. Thanks!

  • #2
    Your kids are pre-teen and teenage. Think of it this way: they're going to be into sports, dating, driving, high school, being with friends, etc. They're not going to focus on you as much as they do now, if at all. Your schedule? Sure, it won't be M-F/9-5 anymore, but that is what the job is. You'll get some holidays off, some birthdays off, some Super Bowls off and some you will not. And when you move into the city, you'll likely live in a half-way decent neighborhood with mostly cops and firemen around.. and you'll begin to socialize/befriend neighbors and people who are police and fire.

    My point is... you adapt and overcome.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Host_85 View Post
      Hey Everyone,
      I'm currently a candidate for CPD, and with the hiring process moving along so "quickly", I'm beginning to get a bit nervous regarding how working as a police officer will affect my family life. I knew it'd be different but will it be drastically different? A little background... I have three kids (one pre-teen and two teens), I currently work a 9-5 weekends off, and we live in the burbs. I grew up in Chicago but left about 12 years ago, so my kids grew up in the burbs. My kids are used to me being home at a certain time and I'm always with them on Holidays. I know my schedule will be basically turned upside down but but how by how much? Will I be able to get any holiday's off? What are typical work hours/days? Is it hard to request a day off (kids birthdays)? Not to mention, we'll have to move back to the city, which is an entirely different post. Maybe I'm overthinking things but any advice on this will be much appreciated. Thanks!
      If you have these questions I need you to truly think about whether or not law enforcement is for you.
      Last edited by ared1984; 07-05-2019, 11:41 PM. Reason: typo

      Comment


      • Host_85
        Host_85 commented
        Editing a comment
        ared1984 As a mother, I would hope any parent would have these same questions. I was just asking for advice. I know this is what I want. Thanks for the input.
        Last edited by Host_85; 07-08-2019, 04:35 PM.

    • #4
      At first you will work crappy hours and crappy days as far as your family is concerned. With time, you will gain seniority and be able to attain better shifts and days off. Going through the rough part at first is just paying your dues for what will eventually be a job that pays a great salary and benefits with which you can take care of your family and have incredible co-workers.

      However, a word of warning. Depending on the person, this job can be addicting. Someone once described it like having a torrid, long term affair with a sleazy, south side whore you just can't get enough of. You will find that the most exciting time to work involves those hours and days when you family wants to see you home. Even though you will eventually earn enough seniority to work Monday - Friday days with weekends off, you may forgoe that to work swings with Monday and Tuesday off because that's where the action is. Use caution and maintain a balance, otherwise you may find yourself in divorce court and not really caring that your wife is kicking you to the curb. Your only concern will be how much alimony and child support you have to pay.

      Keep your priorities straight.

      .,
      Going too far is half the pleasure of not getting anywhere

      Comment


      • Host_85
        Host_85 commented
        Editing a comment
        Haha! Lucky for me I won't fall into that category, partly because I'm a woman and the other is I genuinely love spending time with my family. I will use caution and maintain a balance. Thanks for the advice L-1. Appreciate it!

    • #5
      With High School aged kids, get ready for Catholic High School at approx. $10K a pop. per year (grade school about 6-7K yr.) Unless you want your kids to be products of the gang infested, under achieving, Chicago Public School system. (might not be too fond of your daughter's date to the Kennedy or Morgan Pk HS Prom). Put your suburban raised kids in a CPS and they will have culture shock. Moving back to the City, Mt. Greenwood-West Beverly (average home $300-350K)are most economical alternatives (Remember there are only about 5-6 neighborhoods that you'd want your family at). You most likely will get assigned to a south side District, so if you do buy in Edison Park or Sauganash (average home 400-500K), expect that hour and a half drive to the south side in rush hour traffic every day, as you will be on afternoons or mids. Expect at least 5 years to get out of a south side District, with the possibility of getting to a west side ghetto (nearer to your northwest side residence, though.) Time off, even your regular days off most likely will get cancelled during the summer holidays. I was on about 16 years before I got Christmas or Thanksgiving off.

      You will become cynical dealing with the same crap everyday, when "Huh," "Wha?" and "I dunno" are 90% of the answers to your questions on the street. When I retired, I was looking at my dress blouse and was amazed the nameplate said "XXXXX." For the last 20 years I always thought my last name was "WhiteMFer."

      And none of this will compare with seeing the guy in your class that was the "village idiot" making merit Dic, or Sgt., then believing he's the smartest guy in the room.

      The Chicago Police Dept. of TV, movies, and of just 10 years ago is gone. I even advised my son, who since he was a little kid, wanted nothing but to be a Chicago copper like Dad, to not take the job when he got called. He's doing fine at his burb PD.

      And I've only been retired 5 years, things were bad when I left and getting worse.

      Comment


      • Host_85
        Host_85 commented
        Editing a comment
        Kids are already attending Catholic High School so that won't be much of an issue, but I totally get the culture shock thing. Thanks for the advice though and Congrats on your retirement.

    • #6
      Originally posted by Host_85 View Post
      Hey Everyone,
      I'm currently a candidate for CPD, and with the hiring process moving along so "quickly", I'm beginning to get a bit nervous regarding how working as a police officer will affect my family life. I knew it'd be different but will it be drastically different? A little background... I have three kids (one pre-teen and two teens), I currently work a 9-5 weekends off, and we live in the burbs. I grew up in Chicago but left about 12 years ago, so my kids grew up in the burbs. My kids are used to me being home at a certain time and I'm always with them on Holidays. I know my schedule will be basically turned upside down but but how by how much? Will I be able to get any holiday's off? What are typical work hours/days? Is it hard to request a day off (kids birthdays)? Not to mention, we'll have to move back to the city, which is an entirely different post. Maybe I'm overthinking things but any advice on this will be much appreciated. Thanks!


      I'm seeing nothing but red flags here....

      There are two types of people in this world: those who are humble and those who will be humbled.

      Comment


      • #7
        Originally posted by ChiTownDet View Post
        With High School aged kids, get ready for Catholic High School at approx. $10K a pop. per year (grade school about 6-7K yr.) Unless you want your kids to be products of the gang infested, under achieving, Chicago Public School system. (might not be too fond of your daughter's date to the Kennedy or Morgan Pk HS Prom). Put your suburban raised kids in a CPS and they will have culture shock. Moving back to the City, Mt. Greenwood-West Beverly (average home $300-350K)are most economical alternatives (Remember there are only about 5-6 neighborhoods that you'd want your family at). You most likely will get assigned to a south side District, so if you do buy in Edison Park or Sauganash (average home 400-500K), expect that hour and a half drive to the south side in rush hour traffic every day, as you will be on afternoons or mids. Expect at least 5 years to get out of a south side District, with the possibility of getting to a west side ghetto (nearer to your northwest side residence, though.) Time off, even your regular days off most likely will get cancelled during the summer holidays. I was on about 16 years before I got Christmas or Thanksgiving off.

        You will become cynical dealing with the same crap everyday, when "Huh," "Wha?" and "I dunno" are 90% of the answers to your questions on the street. When I retired, I was looking at my dress blouse and was amazed the nameplate said "XXXXX." For the last 20 years I always thought my last name was "WhiteMFer."

        And none of this will compare with seeing the guy in your class that was the "village idiot" making merit Dic, or Sgt., then believing he's the smartest guy in the room.

        The Chicago Police Dept. of TV, movies, and of just 10 years ago is gone. I even advised my son, who since he was a little kid, wanted nothing but to be a Chicago copper like Dad, to not take the job when he got called. He's doing fine at his burb PD.

        And I've only been retired 5 years, things were bad when I left and getting worse.
        Read this 10 times then rethink your career goals.

        I have known Chi Town for many years and you can treat his words as gospel
        Since some people need to be told by notes in crayon .......Don't PM me with without prior permission. If you can't discuss the situation in the open forum ----it must not be that important

        My new word for the day is FOCUS, when someone irritates you tell them to FOCUS

        Comment


        • Host_85
          Host_85 commented
          Editing a comment
          I read it 11 times just to be safe. Definitely still going through with it. Hopefully I'll connect with people who are as honest and experienced as ChiTownDet. Thanks.

      • #8
        To answer your questions:

        -Family life will be drastically different.
        -You won't be home at predictable times.
        -When you are home, you'll likely be day sleeping or in a half-conscience zombie state.
        -You'll be working evenings, weekends, holidays, birthdays, etc.
        -No one will care that you are missing special family moments because they miss all of theirs.
        -After several years pass, you'll climb the seniority totem pole and have some say re: shift schedule, holidays, etc. Until then, best not even ask.
        -Maybe you should really think about what you're getting into and talk with your family before making this decision.
        -But don't overthink it. In the end, follow your gut instincts.
        There are two types of people in this world: those who are humble and those who will be humbled.

        Comment


        • Host_85
          Host_85 commented
          Editing a comment
          Ratatatat I kind of figured my family life would be different, and also knew work times would be unpredictable. I'm used to the half-conscience zombie state (I'm a mom and have worked in Trauma/ER before). Not looking to have each holiday, all weekends, and every birthday off, just wondering what the odds of getting one of those off was. Even if I do miss special family moments, I would still empathize with the other person that's missing theirs. Spoke with my family and they're rooting for me and ready. I was just wanting some input. I seem to keep getting different answers from different people so I'll just have to wait and see for myself. Thanks though.
          Last edited by Host_85; 07-09-2019, 10:32 AM.

      • #9
        When I first started in law enforcement (corrections, to be precise), I had mostly worked retail, which meant I worked just about every holiday with the exception of Thanksgiving and Christmas, couldn't take vacations around the holidays as those days were blacked out. I had to work just about every weekend, and had to miss family events and vacations because my managers told me that my personal life was not something the company gave a s**t about. So, while an LE shift schedule is worse than that, it's not like I jumped from a cushy 9-5 with nights, weekends, and holidays off. We were already used to me not always being around during normal hours.

        It's a pain, not going to lie. But you and your family will get used to it. You'll learn to make time.
        "If the police have to come get you, they're bringing an @$$ kicking with them!"
        -Chris Rock

        Comment


        • Host_85
          Host_85 commented
          Editing a comment
          GangGreen712 9-5 with weekends and holidays off is definitely a dream. I'm ready for this though. I have been for a while but was just waiting until my kids got a bit older. Appreciate the advice.

      • #10
        Sounds to me like living the dream- 9-5 gig, home nights and weekends, easy life in the 'burbs....

        Why in the hell risk a good thing?

        If the answer is boredom, go skydiving.

        If the answer is to give back to the city, donate to a charity.

        You are about to enter a difficult and violent work situation. You will need support systems in place. So will your family.

        Last edited by Ratatatat; 07-06-2019, 12:16 PM.
        There are two types of people in this world: those who are humble and those who will be humbled.

        Comment


        • #11
          I'm not familiar with Chicago but I am familiar with policing in a violent large city. There are certain archetypes of people who are drawn to it, and able to work in it. Here are my unofficial descriptors of 'who' and 'why':

          Legacys: they were essentially born into the job. Dad was a cop there, uncle was a cop there, brother is a cop there, all they ever saw and knew were cops there. Destiny is predetermined, just like most genetic connections.

          Super Religious: usually very mellow, never complain, and very rarely swear. Often will inject a bit of biblical nuance into daily events, like tell a habitual drunk that he can always change his ways. Almost always hold part-time positions in a church ministry, i.e.- lay pastor, youth director, etc. They fear no evil, despite walking through the valley of the shadow of death every day.

          First Gens: their parents were immigrants who landed in immigrant heavy parts of the city. For them, policing is an opportunity for greater assimilation and to represent their culture with pride.

          Bohemians: easily identified by the Red Bull in hand and both sleeves fully tatted. Looking for that ultimate challenge, that ultimate adrenaline rush, that ultimate razor thin margin from the edge. These guys scare the crap out of everyone else.

          Lost Souls: these are the ones who kind of fell into the job after trying this and that regular occupation but nothing else working out. Ultimate motivation: to be part of something bigger than themselves.


          So ask yourself, do one of these apply? If not, are you a round peg trying to fit in a square hole?

          There are two types of people in this world: those who are humble and those who will be humbled.

          Comment


          • ChiTownDet
            ChiTownDet commented
            Editing a comment
            Man, you're right on the money. Add to this, Chicago has a city residency (which they are serious as a heart attack about. Who has a unit at IAD that just goes after coppers "living out.") One last thing to add to your post, which is specific to Chicago, is people who were born and raised in Chi and don't really even think about being the Police in any other place. It's all they know, all they've ever seen, who all their neighbors are. On my block there is not one person who isn't , either active or retired, copper, fireman, or city worker.

          • Ratatatat
            Ratatatat commented
            Editing a comment
            Detroit had residency requirements as well until the courts ruled they were unconstitutional, oh twenty years ago or so. In a matter of a couple years, stable little neighborhoods that were heavy police/fire ("Copper Canyon") emptied out and became burnt out shells like the rest of the city. But at least cops no longer have to play the residency game anymore: i.e.- own a house in the city but pay rent for a place in the suburbs.

          • Host_85
            Host_85 commented
            Editing a comment
            Ratatatat I'm from Chicago and grew up in Pilsen. I know the city and what it's about. I guess I fall into the First Gens category.

          • LeoBravo
            LeoBravo commented
            Editing a comment
            This post is gold.

        • #12
          Please tell me this is a parody thread of applicants who have no idea what they’re getting themselves into

          Comment


          • ChiTownDet
            ChiTownDet commented
            Editing a comment
            Funny thing, I was born and raised on the west side of Chicago. Worked a fast west suburb for a couple years before I got on CPD. My first day in 007, my mouth was hanging open with the number of calls on that radio. One of the first calls, that first day, was a "stripping the auto in progress, 60th & Bishop." Get there and here's a car, sitting in the middle of the intersection, no wheels, interior gone, battery gone, engine running. And this is at about 4 pm on a summer Sunday. My FTO says "Get used to crap like this. It's everyday, all the time here."
            At that time, little did I know, I would spend half my life, in one capacity or another, in Englewood.

          • Host_85
            Host_85 commented
            Editing a comment
            I'm pretty sure everyone here began their career as an applicant. I was just looking for some advice from some seasoned professionals ( I thought that was the point of this forum??). I know very well what I'm "getting into", have done a good amount of research and spoke with some retirees. Thanks!

        • #13
          What do your kids and significant other (if he/she is in the picture) think? Have you told your kids they will be pulled away from their schools and friends at an already difficult age when their trying to figure everything out? That's going to be a tough transition. They'll survive and adjust but I can't imagine they're going to be happy about it. I'm just being realistic. It's not like any job you've ever had so I hope you talk it over and consider everything. People make it work but it's going to be an adjustment for your whole family and you're going to need them to be on board with your decision.

          Also Ratatatat and ChiTownDet I fall into the "FirstGens" and was born and raised in Chicago and really the only place I ever really wanted to work so I'd say those are accurate observations.

          Comment


          • Host_85
            Host_85 commented
            Editing a comment
            southpaw1 My significant other was not too thrilled at first (I'm 5'1 and 130 lbs) He thought I was too delicate for the job but he's come around. I spoke with my kids about the changes that'll be made in the event that I make it through and they're very for it. My kids grew up in the burbs but me and their father grew up in Chicago and have raised them to be resilient and use their common sense. All in all, my family is very supportive of this. Thanks for the advice!

          • southpaw1
            southpaw1 commented
            Editing a comment
            Host_85 Well that's a good start. Good luck to you!

        • #14
          ..............

          Comment


          • #15
            Originally posted by ChiTownDet View Post
            With High School aged kids, get ready for Catholic High School at approx. $10K a pop. per year (grade school about 6-7K yr.) Unless you want your kids to be products of the gang infested, under achieving, Chicago Public School system. (might not be too fond of your daughter's date to the Kennedy or Morgan Pk HS Prom). Put your suburban raised kids in a CPS and they will have culture shock. Moving back to the City, Mt. Greenwood-West Beverly (average home $300-350K)are most economical alternatives (Remember there are only about 5-6 neighborhoods that you'd want your family at). You most likely will get assigned to a south side District, so if you do buy in Edison Park or Sauganash (average home 400-500K), expect that hour and a half drive to the south side in rush hour traffic every day, as you will be on afternoons or mids. Expect at least 5 years to get out of a south side District, with the possibility of getting to a west side ghetto (nearer to your northwest side residence, though.) Time off, even your regular days off most likely will get cancelled during the summer holidays. I was on about 16 years before I got Christmas or Thanksgiving off.

            You will become cynical dealing with the same crap everyday, when "Huh," "Wha?" and "I dunno" are 90% of the answers to your questions on the street. When I retired, I was looking at my dress blouse and was amazed the nameplate said "XXXXX." For the last 20 years I always thought my last name was "WhiteMFer."

            And none of this will compare with seeing the guy in your class that was the "village idiot" making merit Dic, or Sgt., then believing he's the smartest guy in the room.

            The Chicago Police Dept. of TV, movies, and of just 10 years ago is gone. I even advised my son, who since he was a little kid, wanted nothing but to be a Chicago copper like Dad, to not take the job when he got called. He's doing fine at his burb PD.

            And I've only been retired 5 years, things were bad when I left and getting worse.
            A lot of recruits are being assigned to the Northside. Not that it’s a guarantee but if you live north, you’ll be assigned north. The very least will be West side. Don’t know one person who lived north that was assigned south unless they requested.

            They was a time where you’d get assigned wherever. As the assignments are currently given out, that doesn’t seem to be the case. That could also change.

            Comment


            • LeoBravo
              LeoBravo commented
              Editing a comment
              If what you consider a Northside district being 025, 015, 011, or 010..then yes northsiders are getting assigned to Northside districts. Regardless, if you have no phone call, it's a lottery. I have a friend who got assigned to 006 and living in 024.

            • illini372
              illini372 commented
              Editing a comment
              Had many from my class assigned to 024, 017, 016, 014, and 025. No phone calls. A few to 018. None to 019 or 001. Then again, I just spoke to two PPOs who live waaay south and were assigned to 016 for their cycles. Really is a crapshoot.

            • southpaw1
              southpaw1 commented
              Editing a comment
              illini372 and LeoBravo If you guys saw the latest assignments it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever lol. It's very clear who the "phone call" people are too.

          MR300x250 Tablet

          Collapse

          What's Going On

          Collapse

          There are currently 12137 users online. 477 members and 11660 guests.

          Most users ever online was 19,482 at 11:44 AM on 09-29-2011.

          Welcome Ad

          Collapse
          Working...
          X