Sizing up Rush's Rams
Rush Limbaugh made a splash in the news this week when he released a statement confirming that he and business partner Dave Checketts had made a bid to buy the NFL's St. Louis Rams. While thinking about the ramifications of Rush co-owning an NFL franchise, we imagined how Limbaugh might throw his weight around in the owner's box, and came up with a few suggestions for Rush on how he might be able to cut some corners and gain a competitive advantage in the league.
Our first idea was inspired by Limbaugh's baseless assertions and smears of Department of Education official Kevin Jennings. In his recent broadcasts, Rush refused to recognize the facts in the right-wing concocted controversy surrounding Jennings. Not only was there no evidence to support Limbaugh's claim that Jennings gave "advice" to a student to "further" the student's relationship with an older man, but Rush repeatedly lied about the student's age at the time. Despite concrete evidence that says the student was 16, Rush continued to insist the student was 15 years old.
Since Rush is apparently fine with lying about people's ages, he might as well use it to his benefit as owner of the Rams. Why draft washed-up college athletes when you can flout the rules and pick up the top high school prospects? And if the league conclusively determines they're too young to play, he could just hold press conference after press conference saying they're old enough, provide no documentation of their age, and send them out onto the gridiron anyway.
Drafting his players out of high school may end up being a necessity, as Rush Limbaugh's Rams might have trouble even fielding a team. Since Rush announced his bid for the team, several athletes have come out to state their reluctance to play for the radio host. Donavan McNabb -- with whom Rush has some history -- told a reporter that he "won't be in St. Louis anytime soon" if Limbaugh's deal goes through. A few other players in the New York market have also come out to say they wouldn't play for him, either. And to make matters worse, it doesn't sound like the sports media will be welcoming him with open arms.
But what about the general health and well-being of the team and his employees? Well, they can forget about trainers or health coverage of any kind -- it's time for them to "man up"! Besides, it's cheaper to pay for your own health care anyway. Strained quadriceps? Torn rotator cuff? Pssh, walk it off, Nancy. Those are just examples of "media-inspired plagues or panics," like that H1N1 virus. Speaking of which, that's another area in which Limbaugh might be able to cut the organization's health care costs. His personnel certainly won't be getting vaccinated if we're to take at face value Rush's defiant stand against Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius' polite suggestions that at-risk persons and their families get the H1N1 vaccine.
Read the rest of this fine piece at: http://mediamatters.org/columns/200910090057
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