I'll try to keep this a short as possible. After reading more about the background process I got to thinking...
As far as Background investigation goes, my mother passed away from cancer, I haven't told my Grandparents I'm trying to become an LEO because they flipped when my bro went into the Military (don't want to worry them 80+yrs. old), and my father is someone who I don't talk to anymore. I have 2 uncles, aunts, I could have the BI's talk to (Dad's own brother want talk to him). My wife and inlaws are also possibilities.
I don't want it to be an issue for the BI's that I don't talk with my father. To put it bluntly he's an evil person, and only one person in the entire family wants anything to do with him. My brother and I are on the same page. I could go on about this, but just to give you an idea, the last thing he said to my brother and I was, "Look, your mother can't even die right."
Needless to say, my father would probably give me a bad review because he would love to throw in one more jab, or try and twist the knife a little more. I know the BIs are good at what they do, but someone's father is usually held as a little bit more of a credible source, is it not?
If I don't put him down as a ref., are they going to ask me why? Both my brother and I were great kids, and I don't want to sound like a guy who's going to blame life's problem on his parents, because that's not me. I just don't see how this is going to sound good either way, and it's really bothering me. Should I down play this and act like it's no big deal for me? I know my brother, uncle, wife, friends I grew up with will back my up if they ask why the poor relationship. Family really is important to me, I don't want them to think it's not. What do you think?
As far as Background investigation goes, my mother passed away from cancer, I haven't told my Grandparents I'm trying to become an LEO because they flipped when my bro went into the Military (don't want to worry them 80+yrs. old), and my father is someone who I don't talk to anymore. I have 2 uncles, aunts, I could have the BI's talk to (Dad's own brother want talk to him). My wife and inlaws are also possibilities.
I don't want it to be an issue for the BI's that I don't talk with my father. To put it bluntly he's an evil person, and only one person in the entire family wants anything to do with him. My brother and I are on the same page. I could go on about this, but just to give you an idea, the last thing he said to my brother and I was, "Look, your mother can't even die right."
Needless to say, my father would probably give me a bad review because he would love to throw in one more jab, or try and twist the knife a little more. I know the BIs are good at what they do, but someone's father is usually held as a little bit more of a credible source, is it not?
If I don't put him down as a ref., are they going to ask me why? Both my brother and I were great kids, and I don't want to sound like a guy who's going to blame life's problem on his parents, because that's not me. I just don't see how this is going to sound good either way, and it's really bothering me. Should I down play this and act like it's no big deal for me? I know my brother, uncle, wife, friends I grew up with will back my up if they ask why the poor relationship. Family really is important to me, I don't want them to think it's not. What do you think?
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