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When Psychiatrists Attack!!

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  • When Psychiatrists Attack!!

    Finally had my interview with the psychiatrist yesterday; quite the alienating, empty, and disappointing experience. I'm only finishing the long screening process because it was already almost over when I took my current job, and to preserve it as a "backup" option until my Federal probationary period ends in another five months. If I were banking on that LE position, I'd be even more horrified, and those of you DQ'd by incompetent psychiatrists in pursuit of your career goals have my deepest sympathies.

    Background:

    Big department, tens of thousand took the test; scored almost perfect, at the top of first group called. Mini-medical, full medical, fitness test, background interview, written psych exam, 9-month background investigation, oral psych with psychologist, oral psych with psychiatrist based on psychologist's inconclusive findings. Psychiatrist mentioned she never heard of the psychologist.

    Some highlights:

    Psychiatrist reads from psychologist's notes that "...subject did not interact with anybody in the waiting room...wore large overcoat that he kept on during interview...declined to shake hands...said he had a cold, but no apparent symptoms...introverted and very repressed..."

    (There were two guys in the psychologist's waiting room when I showed up...private house where waiting room is separated by glass doors from consultation area...one guy is sitting and seems very nervous...we both say "how you doing" when I come in...other guy has his back to us taking the 400-question written test...maybe I should have interrupted him to introduce myself Room is freezing cold...when she comes out to take the nervous guy, I ask her if it's OK to kill the overhead fan blowing the cold air around...she turns it off and I thank her for it. When it's my turn, she extends her hand and I politely explain that I'm just getting over the flu, which just so happens to be true, as I missed two days at work for it, earlier that week...guess I should have done the "normal" thing and shared my germs with her. The consultation room is even colder than the waiting room, and I'm wondering whether it's for economical reasons that she doesn't have it heated in the dead of winter)

    I respond politely that I'm shocked at the psychologist's perceptions and conclusions, try to explain about the cold room and so forth. Psychiatrist asks me whether I "took anything this morning...maybe some alcohol or stimulants" I say absolutely not, and ask politely why she would even think that. "Well, you seem so very different from this description, because you're very animated and talkative."

    What I'm thinking" No kidding Sigmund Freud, maybe that's why you should probably preserve your scientific objectivity by examining me FIRST, before you form assumptions and expectations based on the conclusions of someone with less training than you, whom you've never met. Frankly, I don't really like shaking people's hands, because that IS how colds are transmitted and 60% or more people don't even wash their hands after going to the bathroom unless someone they know is watching them...but in that case, I WAS actually still sick...guess you never read the "Handwashing" or "Alcohol Gel" threads on O.com, huh?"

    Q: "So, you don't consider yourself introverted or shy?"
    A: "No, and I think if you told anybody who knows me that I'm "introverted," they'd laugh hysterically.

    Then she turns to the sheet of paper I filled out a few minutes earlier. It had a list of attributes and sentiments on it, with instructions to check the ones that apply and leave the rest alone. I check all the positive ones (truthfully) and leave all the negatives blank (truthfully). The negative ones all pertain to low self-worth, depression, hopelessness, etc. The only negative I check is "Misunderstood."

    Q: What do you mean by "misunderstood"?
    A: Like being considered introverted when I'm really just cold and still sick...

    Q: On your written test, you answered "somewhat" to the question about whether you are ever afraid of people or things that you know can't hurt you...
    A: Yes, I'm afraid of cockroaches. I know cockroaches can't hurt me any more than ants or spiders...if there were a spider right here (pointing six inches from me on the table) I would blow it away or take it over to the window...if it were a roach, I'd be out of this chair...
    Q: So, if you saw a cockroach, you'd leave the room... (and now, she's writing in her notes)
    A: No, I said I'd be out of this chair...I would not "leave the room"...
    Q: You said you'd leave the room...
    A: No!...(politely, exclaiming)...I said "chair," not "room"...

    What I'm thinking: "Listen you old bat, if you have a hearing problem, I can play BACK the conversation, because I'm recording it...except, if I did, you'd be writing that I was paranoid and defensive, right?"

    Q: What about people who can't hurt you?
    A: I am not scared of any people who can't hurt me.
    Q: But that's not what you answered to the question...it said 'OR people'
    A: Yes, it is...the question said 'people or things" I said 'yes' meaning cockroaches...if I answered "no" to that, I'd be lying if I were afraid of EITHER of them...the question said "OR" not "AND"...(now, she's writing again...probably words like "defensive", "argumentative", "denial", etc)

    What I'm thinking: "Are you KIDDING me?? You're here evaluating people psychologically, based on their answers to questions you don't even UNDERSTAND, yourself??

    Q: You also answered "yes" to whether you awaken easily while sleeping.
    A: Yes, I've always been a very light sleeper...I'm jealous of people who can sleep right through loud noises.
    Q: But you answered "no" to whether you ever have trouble sleeping...or waking during sleep.
    A: I don't have any trouble sleeping, and if there's no noise to wake me up, I sleep right through the night.
    Q: You're answering very quickly...almost without thinking first.
    A: Maybe I just think quickly, and I'm just being honest.
    Q: You know, sometimes, when people are impatient and answer very quickly and aggressively, that's their defense mechanism...they've been hurt in the past, and that's how they protect themselves and keep people at a distance...
    A: ...and sometimes people who haven't been hurt in the past and who aren't trying to protect themselves just think quickly...
    Q: Yes. (Clearly annoyed)

    What I'm thinking: "Gee, I didn't realize quick thinking and absolute candor were such drawbacks in LE"

    Q: You told the psychologists that you don't really have that many interests...
    A: That's right. Other than working out at the gym and working, I don't really do all that much else...
    Q: What do you think about usually, just during the day?
    A: Generally, I would say that I don't think about much besides how the traffic is going to be for my trip home from work, whether my wife and I are going to workout together or alone, etc
    Q: You have no other interests?
    A: Well, I used to have certain intellectual interests...
    Q: Such as?
    A: I was interested in human psychology, understanding romantic love, the origin of the universe, and big-bang-related things...my book shelves are fiilled with books on those topics, but after reading them and answering the questions I had, I'm not as interested anymore, unless the subject comes up in conversation.

    What she asked me next, about any of that:

    NOTHING.

    Q: I can't help coming back to this, because you are acting VERY different from this evaluation...are you very anxious or nervous being here?
    A: I have to admit that I'm still flabbergasted that you asked me whether I was "on anything" because this is my normal personality...I am hardly "introverted"...as far as "repressed," you're more than welcome to ask me anything at all about my life and feelings...

    What I'm thinking: "Way to go, Einstein...maybe you should trust your own observations instead of being biased by a 'conflict' with the assessment of someone you don't know anything about and making ridiculous assumptions about me...If you want to explore the issue of 'repression', why don't you ask me about my feelings about losing my mother at 10, or about my relationships with women, or my feelings about having worked in a strip club, and any feelings or thoughts I have about my wife's dancing naked on a stage?"

    Q: Is this how you are all the time? You're not anxious at all, being here? Because you seem rather hyper...
    A: I have always talked fast, and I am not nervous...if you're asking whether my pulse rate and blood pressure are exactly the same right now as they will be in two hours, when I'm back at my desk, then yes, I imagine they're slightly higher under this 'evaluative interview situation' but no more so than one would be under any interview situation compared to at one's desk...
    Q: We're not talking about "one", we're just talking about YOU...
    A: I was just trying to say that, in the context of the "white coat syndrome" one can expect to be slightly less relaxed in any interview situation.
    Q: I just want to talk about YOU, and nobody here is wearing a white coat.

    What I'm thinking: "Way to understand a simple analogy and manner of speaking, Einstein."

    A: Yes, I would say MY pulse and BP are probably slightly higher under this interview situation than under normal, non-interview situations, but no, I do not consider myself "nervous" or "anxious" at all, given the circumstances...
    Q: "Given the circumstances?"
    A: ...of an interview, as opposed to at my desk or at home.

    At this point, I have an itch on my neck...when I scratch the itch, I feel that my t-shirt might be riding a little high on my neck and I stuff it down a bit, because I hate when I can see my t-shirt poking up under my collar, especially, when it's not white (I was wearing a maroon shirt, so I didn't bother wearing a "matching" or white colored t-shirt underneath, necessarily.)

    Q: Are you feeling warm?
    A: No, I just had an itch on my neck.

    What she's probably thinking: "Wow, he's really getting hot under the collar now, I hope the officers out there can subdue him if he attacks me."

    What I'm wondering: "Should I title the thread 'When Psychiatrists Attack' or 'Is Strangling the Psychiatrist an Automatic DQ?'"

    OK, so maybe she got ONE right.

    I'm not even expecting an appointment with the review board, but an outright DQ, based strictly on this nonsense.
    Last edited by ProWriter; 05-11-2005, 10:06 AM.
    No longer ignoring anybody here, since that psycho known as "Josey Wales" finally got the boot after being outed as a LE imposter by B&G978. Nice job.

  • #2
    I do love your writing, sounds like they were trying to get under your skin for some reason.
    "Respect for religion must be reestablished. Public debt should be reduced. The arrogance of public officials must be curtailed. Assistance to foreign lands must be stopped or we shall bankrupt ourselves. The people should be forced to work and not depend on government for subsistence." - Cicero, 60 B.C.

    For California police academy notes go to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/CABasicPolice/

    Comment


    • #3
      You got a great memory, i do know that much. So what happens now, you lose a job or you go elsewhere, also didn't pay this person yourself?

      Comment


      • #4
        Thanks, but I wasn't even trying to be funny...this is practically verbatim off my tape. If I were banking on this LE job, I'd be very upset about this. I even listened to the tape last night, half expecting to HEAR myself sounding "hyper" and whatever else...but I sounded no different from the interview I had to get THIS job. If this were a panel of officers, I'd have assumed that they were testing my response to stress. I do not believe she was doing that, at all, because nobody's that good an actress. By the same token, I believe she'd be an easy mark for the type of street-smart candidate who lied through his teeth throughout about criminal activities that were never uncovered by the BI's.
        No longer ignoring anybody here, since that psycho known as "Josey Wales" finally got the boot after being outed as a LE imposter by B&G978. Nice job.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Creed
          You got a great memory, i do know that much. So what happens now, you lose a job or you go elsewhere, also didn't pay this person yourself?
          It's all explained in the "notes" in my profile, but basically, I finally found the perfect Federal job 2 yrs+ into the process with this department. I just want to complete the process, in case I need to fall back on it before I become a "permanent" Federal employee in October.

          It was the department shrink. I have half a mind to appeal if I get DQ'd on this and pay for my own shrink STRICTLY for the benefit of future qualified applicants whose careers are at stake when they get evaluated by this quack.
          No longer ignoring anybody here, since that psycho known as "Josey Wales" finally got the boot after being outed as a LE imposter by B&G978. Nice job.

          Comment


          • #6
            Now are all Physciatrists like that, or is she an exception? I have to take that MMPI test and i'm not looking forward to dealing with a Doc like that.

            Comment


            • #7
              my psych exp

              It is a scary thought that a psychologist or polygrapher has the power to disqualify someone. Both of them are inexact sciences (if you want to call it a science) that are up to the interpretation of the examiner. It seems like they can interpret the results however they want and you are powerless to do anything. Just my 2 cents.
              "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't."

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Creed
                Now are all Physciatrists like that, or is she an exception? I have to take that MMPI test and i'm not looking forward to dealing with a Doc like that.
                Probably luck of the draw. Actually, I was glad that it was a female name on my letter, because the first appointment that I couldn't keep was with a male shrink. I thought if the topic of strip clubs or my wife's dancing (already disclosed to my B.I. in response to her direct questions) came up, a female doctor would be more likely to appreciate my attitude toward male chauvinism and the gender-based sexual double standard. My guess is they take the lowest bid shrinks to save money.
                No longer ignoring anybody here, since that psycho known as "Josey Wales" finally got the boot after being outed as a LE imposter by B&G978. Nice job.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by ProWriter
                  Probably luck of the draw. Actually, I was glad that it was a female name on my letter, because the first appointment that I couldn't keep was with a male shrink. I thought if the topic of strip clubs or my wife's dancing (already disclosed to my B.I. in response to her direct questions) came up, a female doctor would be more likely to appreciate my attitude toward male chauvinism and the gender-based sexual double standard. My guess is they take the lowest bid shrinks to save money.
                  Of Course, the lower their class rank, the lower these "Docs" get paid. Pro, off the topic, did you ever play hockey with a Mooney?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by HeyCJ
                    ProWriter, does your user name have anything to do with the way you write? If this job doesn't come through then may I suggest...You'd make a damn good shrink yourself! If not that, then definitely a career in writing! BTW for that agency's sake...with your talent...they had better hire you.
                    Thanks CJ. Yeah, I write reports and speeches for the Regional Federal IG (since October). If I'd been a good enough student to get into (and through) med school (which is a LOT harder than law school), I'd have loved to be a shrink or a vet. I was planning on withdrawing from this agency's academy list on the day of my first anniversary on my current job, so I probably don't need this LE job. Still, it was a very negative experience and I feel really bad for anybody else who already went through this very lenghty process just to get DQ'd by some hard-of-hearing quack who probably has already DQ'd plenty of qualified people and let through people whose B.I. never discovered that their "street-name" in their old 'hood was "Trouble."

                    Creed: "Mooney"? Not sure, goalie? Where/when?
                    No longer ignoring anybody here, since that psycho known as "Josey Wales" finally got the boot after being outed as a LE imposter by B&G978. Nice job.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Creed
                      Now are all Physciatrists like that, or is she an exception? I have to take that MMPI test and i'm not looking forward to dealing with a Doc like that.
                      Creed I did the MMPI last week, and the test was over 800 questions (2 seperate tests) and my interview with the "person" (don't know what level of professionalism he was) was only about 10-15 minutes. It was not a stressful situation at all. I am a psyche major, so some of these tests just don't work for me.

                      Pro - sorry to hear about your experience, but thanks for the laugh!
                      When I'll be the girl that you love, you'll be the boy that I hate...

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        There is a psychiatrist in the Denver area that does alot of law enforcement evaluations.

                        His tactics were basically trying to **** people off and see how they reacted. He always tried to make people uncomfortable.

                        I always assumed they were watching me in the waiting room and acted accordingly

                        Why doesn't the psychiatrist meet you for a beer and some wings at "Hooters". He would learn much more about you. This really isn't a joke. He could see how you acted around good looking women and in a public setting.

                        Maybe I ought to start my own psychiatric service.

                        Thats right I am a cop and I do that crap.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by USAcop
                          There is a psychiatrist in the Denver area that does alot of law enforcement evaluations.

                          His tactics were basically trying to **** people off and see how they reacted. He always tried to make people uncomfortable.

                          I always assumed they were watching me in the waiting room and acted accordingly

                          Why doesn't the psychiatrist meet you for a beer and some wings at "Hooters". He would learn much more about you. This really isn't a joke. He could see how you acted around good looking women and in a public setting.

                          Maybe I ought to start my own psychiatric service.

                          Thats right I am a cop and I do that crap.
                          I know who you are talking about, a guy in my academy went to him and it got ugly really fast! Thank God, I had the other office that does them.

                          I agree with that theory, of wings and beer, if you really want to know what I am like.
                          When I'll be the girl that you love, you'll be the boy that I hate...

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Prowriter, which LE agency are you going for? Says you're in NYC so have you applied for NYPD?

                            I also had my date with the psyc. not too long ago here in NYC. Did not have a good feeling about the whole interview, but I guess I'll find out soon enough on if whether I passed or failed.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Physciatrists, they're all nuts; that's why they got into it to cure themselves, and it ain
                              Kelly

                              We are the thin blue line
                              between you
                              and all the money in the world.

                              And no you can't have any.

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