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Should I pursue this career?

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  • Should I pursue this career?

    Want to start off by saying hello and thanks in advance for any feedback or comments. This isn't really a post from me trying to figure out whether or not I want to get into being a CO, but I may have sufficiently screwed myself out of any chance of getting into it and am just trying to get some opinions on whether or not I should bother pursuing it any longer.

    Now, I feel like I have to give a little background here on myself, but I don't want anyone to mistake it for me trying to make excuses. I did what I did and I own up to it.

    Growing up wasn't the greatest experience for me. I was constantly surrounded by drug addicts, hookers, pimps, biker gangs and just loads of unsavory people. I never got involved in any of it, but it was just part of my daily life. I feel like this made me pretty indifferent to...well...just about everything. Having to see these ladies sell their bodies in the back room of the local strip club my mother worked? No big deal. Happens damn near every day. Mom's boyfriend wants to take me for a ride on his Harley? Sure sounds like fun. Oh you gotta take care of some business? Sure, I'll just hang out here while you beat the breaks off this guy for...whatever reason. I never really bothered to ask. Forgot to mention he's an enforcer for the local bike gang. There's much more, but I'm sure you get the point.

    Cut to me at 14 years old. At this point I'm pretty numb to just about everything, don't much care about any kind of terrible acts going on around me. Some kid I knew at the time brings over a USB (or maybe a CD? Don't remember). Throw's it in my computer and shows me a video of his uncle, which had to be close to 30 at the time, having sex with a girl we knew. She had to be about the same age as I was. Now at the time I didn't really care at all, thought it was a little strange he wanted to watch this with me, but whatever. This seems random, but more on it later.

    Jump ahead again to about 16 or so. I suddenly care. About everything.I honestly can't say why, it's like a switch flipped over night. I'm disgusted by the acts my family and "friends" have committed throughout my life, and the things my mother exposed me to as a child. So I start distancing myself from all of that. A year or so later my mother meets a man that really looks legit at first. Has a little bit of a past with booze and cocaine, but has since left that behind long ago. Has a couple of small businesses under him and has his **** straight. My mom starts cleaning up her act and is lookin a-okay in my book. So I start opening up to her again.

    A couple of years go by and I start working for John (Mother's boyfriend). Start off doing construction, unfortunately he is forced to close that down. Starts up a deli next to his bar, so cool beans I have a job again. Another year goes by, I become aware he has illegal gambling machines in his bar and he suspects he is being watched. Okay....not so legit...but that's not my problem. Oh wait...you want to start cashing your people out over here at the deli? Okay I guess...it's your business. Now when he isn't around I'm like a pseudo manager. So we get busy, have whole families in there. Then cracky McCrackhead Methteeth stumbles on over from the bar lookin to get cashed out. The girl that usually does it isn't here, so yeah, there are a handful of occasions I had to cash out these asshats that were causing trouble in my work place for these not so Cracky McCrackhead people that were just there for some food.

    Life goes on for a bit, mother succumbs to cancer/chemo and I decide I should just move on away from this mess and never look back. Now I'm looking for what to do with my life and I think "Well I have this crazy urge to do something about all these people doing all these insanely idiotic and illegal things." And I can't very well just go up to them and beat them into the ground until they stop. That would just be crazy. So I shoot for a career as a CO or LEO.

    So last year I blindly walk into this with no idea what to do. I somehow make my way into an interview process for a sponsorship to the local academy. Everything is goin great. They ask questions, I answer. I get to a polygraph test. She tells me ahead of time the questions I will be asked. One is regarding sexual crimes. I suddenly think "Oh ****...that girl in the video from 10 or more years ago. Did she grow up ok? Is she all messed up in the head? Was that guy just goin around sleeping with underage chicks? Why didn't I say anything to anyone? Did I technically watch child pornography? Ok just tell the examiner." I couldn't. I could not get this out. I don't know why, maybe because I feared what my potential colleagues may think of me. That's all I can come up with. So it shows on the test, which I knew. How could it not? I suddenly got so damn nervous. So I withhold that info. I knew I blew it. No way did I get in. Get an email letting me know I didn't a week later.

    So just a few days ago, about a year from the 1st time, I try to get a sponsorship again. I have a quick interview with a gentleman and before any conversation starts I immediately tell him about what I didn't say during the polygraph the year prior. He says he appreciates the honesty and that I just put that up front right away. Then he tells me that they think I was way more involved in that gambling situation with my mother's ex than I was letting on, which is the main reason I didn't get in the 1st time and now with what I just told him about withholding what I did in the polygraph that it's not lookin good for me. This is about the time I start swearing up and down that I had nothing more to do with the gambling thing than what I told them, which was that barely a handful of times I had to pay out to some people. Which, I don't expect anyone to believe and understand why they wouldn't, is the truth. Couple of days later he calls and regrets to inform me that I will not be considered any further and will never be hired there.

    So here I am, going to just go to the academy the hard way and will probably have to live out of my car as my current employer tells me there is no way I will be able to work there with the schedule I will have and will have to let go. Which honestly isn't much a big deal to me. What I am worried about is if I will ever be able to get a career going? I know they investigate any previous attempts to get a position elsewhere and I'm sure they will see what happened with my last attempt, which doesn't much matter because I would tell them about withholding info on a polygraph. I know now that I can't get into this while holding back any info. Regardless of how shameful it may be.

    I suppose to put it simply, between the gambling situation and have pretty much lied on a polygraph would I ever be considered? Or would they just gloss over that and immediately dismiss me from any application process? This is very much what I want to do, but I also don't want to waste mine or anyone else time. I know that no one can really know for sure (or maybe they can?), but I would just like to get any type of opinions from anyone working in this kind of field, whether it be CO or LEO or anything in between.

    Thank you again for taking the time to read this long winded story of mine, and even more so for any comments, advice or insight on this.

  • #2
    I don't think the video is an issue. However, the gambling thing is. The minute you realized the gambling machines were illegal but continued to facilitate its operation you knowingly and willingly committed a crime. It doesn't matter that it wasn't your business. Maybe I take this knowledge for granted because I am in law enforcement, but not realizing that what you were doing was wrong (and a crime) is also an issue. I'm not saying you are completely barred from law enforcement, but I do think it will be tough, tougher than most. Law enforcement tends to have a very rigid set of rules that govern who is eligible for hire. Unfortunately, mistakes in one's past, regardless of how long ago, have the potential to disqualify candidates. If you want a career in law enforcement I think you have to first understand how your actions at the deli contributed to the illegal gambling operation, then use that knowledge to explain how you've changed and matured in your understanding of right and wrong, and how as a police officer you can't just turn a blind eye and say "it's not my problem". My honest opinion is that you should also keep your options open and look for other ways to help people, just in case law enforcement doesn't work out.

    Comment


    • #3
      Apply. You will never know if you don't. This website is populated by people who have zero verification.

      I also recommend trying your luck at the Federal Level. They need people too.
      semper destravit

      Comment


      • #4
        Ah, I apologize I can see how it could seem that's what I meant by not my problem. I meant not my problem in that he was being watched, and looking at it objectively I would agree whole heartedly with you in that I should have done something in the form of going to the authorities or just leaving then and there, but I did have bills to pay and it was a paycheck to paycheck kind of thing. If that place went under then so did my livelihood. At the time that wasn't an option as not only did I rely on it, but my girlfriend at the time was falling on hard times and having a tough time finding a job. Her family wasn't any better than mine. Not even a little reliable and certainly not a healthy group of people to be around.

        Comment


        • #5
          If I can be blunt with you Mr. Scott. As it relates to most youthful indiscretions TIME MITIGATES MOST THINGS. You never stated how old you were when the gambling went down and how old you are now. Don't even get me started on polygraphs. The sooner you accept that polygraphs are pseudo science and one of the bigger frauds perpetrated on law enforcement applicants the better. I know individuals who lied their a** off and still passed. I also know individuals who told the truth and failed miserably. Best thing you can do in my opinion is stop over thinking it and answer as honestly as you can. If its meant to be it will all work out.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post
            Want to start off by saying hello and thanks in advance for any feedback or comments. This isn't really a post from me trying to figure out whether or not I want to get into being a CO, but I may have sufficiently screwed myself out of any chance of getting into it and am just trying to get some opinions on whether or not I should bother pursuing it any longer.

            Now, I feel like I have to give a little background here on myself, but I don't want anyone to mistake it for me trying to make excuses. I did what I did and I own up to it.

            Growing up wasn't the greatest experience for me. I was constantly surrounded by drug addicts, hookers, pimps, biker gangs and just loads of unsavory people. I never got involved in any of it, but it was just part of my daily life. I feel like this made me pretty indifferent to...well...just about everything. Having to see these ladies sell their bodies in the back room of the local strip club my mother worked? No big deal. Happens damn near every day. Mom's boyfriend wants to take me for a ride on his Harley? Sure sounds like fun. Oh you gotta take care of some business? Sure, I'll just hang out here while you beat the breaks off this guy for...whatever reason. I never really bothered to ask. Forgot to mention he's an enforcer for the local bike gang. There's much more, but I'm sure you get the point.

            Cut to me at 14 years old. At this point I'm pretty numb to just about everything, don't much care about any kind of terrible acts going on around me. Some kid I knew at the time brings over a USB (or maybe a CD? Don't remember). Throw's it in my computer and shows me a video of his uncle, which had to be close to 30 at the time, having sex with a girl we knew. She had to be about the same age as I was. Now at the time I didn't really care at all, thought it was a little strange he wanted to watch this with me, but whatever. This seems random, but more on it later.

            Jump ahead again to about 16 or so. I suddenly care. About everything.I honestly can't say why, it's like a switch flipped over night. I'm disgusted by the acts my family and "friends" have committed throughout my life, and the things my mother exposed me to as a child. So I start distancing myself from all of that. A year or so later my mother meets a man that really looks legit at first. Has a little bit of a past with booze and cocaine, but has since left that behind long ago. Has a couple of small businesses under him and has his **** straight. My mom starts cleaning up her act and is lookin a-okay in my book. So I start opening up to her again.

            A couple of years go by and I start working for John (Mother's boyfriend). Start off doing construction, unfortunately he is forced to close that down. Starts up a deli next to his bar, so cool beans I have a job again. Another year goes by, I become aware he has illegal gambling machines in his bar and he suspects he is being watched. Okay....not so legit...but that's not my problem. Oh wait...you want to start cashing your people out over here at the deli? Okay I guess...it's your business. Now when he isn't around I'm like a pseudo manager. So we get busy, have whole families in there. Then cracky McCrackhead Methteeth stumbles on over from the bar lookin to get cashed out. The girl that usually does it isn't here, so yeah, there are a handful of occasions I had to cash out these asshats that were causing trouble in my work place for these not so Cracky McCrackhead people that were just there for some food.

            Life goes on for a bit, mother succumbs to cancer/chemo and I decide I should just move on away from this mess and never look back. Now I'm looking for what to do with my life and I think "Well I have this crazy urge to do something about all these people doing all these insanely idiotic and illegal things." And I can't very well just go up to them and beat them into the ground until they stop. That would just be crazy. So I shoot for a career as a CO or LEO.

            So last year I blindly walk into this with no idea what to do. I somehow make my way into an interview process for a sponsorship to the local academy. Everything is goin great. They ask questions, I answer. I get to a polygraph test. She tells me ahead of time the questions I will be asked. One is regarding sexual crimes. I suddenly think "Oh ****...that girl in the video from 10 or more years ago. Did she grow up ok? Is she all messed up in the head? Was that guy just goin around sleeping with underage chicks? Why didn't I say anything to anyone? Did I technically watch child pornography? Ok just tell the examiner." I couldn't. I could not get this out. I don't know why, maybe because I feared what my potential colleagues may think of me. That's all I can come up with. So it shows on the test, which I knew. How could it not? I suddenly got so damn nervous. So I withhold that info. I knew I blew it. No way did I get in. Get an email letting me know I didn't a week later.

            So just a few days ago, about a year from the 1st time, I try to get a sponsorship again. I have a quick interview with a gentleman and before any conversation starts I immediately tell him about what I didn't say during the polygraph the year prior. He says he appreciates the honesty and that I just put that up front right away. Then he tells me that they think I was way more involved in that gambling situation with my mother's ex than I was letting on, which is the main reason I didn't get in the 1st time and now with what I just told him about withholding what I did in the polygraph that it's not lookin good for me. This is about the time I start swearing up and down that I had nothing more to do with the gambling thing than what I told them, which was that barely a handful of times I had to pay out to some people. Which, I don't expect anyone to believe and understand why they wouldn't, is the truth. Couple of days later he calls and regrets to inform me that I will not be considered any further and will never be hired there.

            So here I am, going to just go to the academy the hard way and will probably have to live out of my car as my current employer tells me there is no way I will be able to work there with the schedule I will have and will have to let go. Which honestly isn't much a big deal to me. What I am worried about is if I will ever be able to get a career going? I know they investigate any previous attempts to get a position elsewhere and I'm sure they will see what happened with my last attempt, which doesn't much matter because I would tell them about withholding info on a polygraph. I know now that I can't get into this while holding back any info. Regardless of how shameful it may be.

            I suppose to put it simply, between the gambling situation and have pretty much lied on a polygraph would I ever be considered? Or would they just gloss over that and immediately dismiss me from any application process? This is very much what I want to do, but I also don't want to waste mine or anyone else time. I know that no one can really know for sure (or maybe they can?), but I would just like to get any type of opinions from anyone working in this kind of field, whether it be CO or LEO or anything in between.

            Thank you again for taking the time to read this long winded story of mine, and even more so for any comments, advice or insight on this.
            I just skimmed this but I would highly recommend NOT quitting a job and enrolling in a self sponsored academy without KNOWING if you have a major BACKGROUND problem
            Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post
            . Couple of days later he calls and regrets to inform me that I will not be considered any further and will never be hired there..
            I think that is your answer

            Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post

            I suppose to put it simply, between the gambling situation and have pretty much lied on a polygraph would I ever be considered?
            Google "Brady vs Maryland" and see why lying during an application process is so important

            And sorry, you didn't " pretty much lied on a polygraph"-----------you consciously withheld information during the polygraph

            Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post
            ? Ok just tell the examiner." I couldn't. I could not get this out. I don't know why, maybe because I feared what my potential colleagues may think of me. That's all I can come up with. So it shows on the test, which I knew. How could it not? I suddenly got so damn nervous. So I withhold that info. I knew I blew it. No way did I get in. Get an email letting me know I didn't a week later.
            Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post
            Or would they just gloss over that and immediately dismiss me from any application process?
            An agency wouldn't be "glossing over" anything by dismissing you from the process with your baggage. They would be practicing due diligence in investigating your past

            Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post
            This is very much what I want to do, but I also don't want to waste mine or anyone else time. I know that no one can really know for sure (or maybe they can?), but I would just like to get any type of opinions from anyone working in this kind of field, whether it be CO or LEO or anything in between..
            I think your chances of being hired in the Law Enforcement profession is pretty slim considering the baggage you are carrying into the application process
            Since some people need to be told by notes in crayon .......Don't PM me with without prior permission. If you can't discuss the situation in the open forum ----it must not be that important

            My new word for the day is FOCUS, when someone irritates you tell them to FOCUS

            Comment


            • #7
              I'm beginning to wonder if this story is even legit. Just like the last one kevinsimpson posted some long drawn out story just to get our opinion on some absurd situation

              Comment


              • #8
                ya think ?
                Originally posted by kzvo91 View Post
                I'm beginning to wonder if this story is even legit. Just like the last one kevinsimpson posted some long drawn out story just to get our opinion on some absurd situation
                Since some people need to be told by notes in crayon .......Don't PM me with without prior permission. If you can't discuss the situation in the open forum ----it must not be that important

                My new word for the day is FOCUS, when someone irritates you tell them to FOCUS

                Comment


                • #9
                  Ok , hear me out , just hear me out.
                  When I was 16 I witnessed a minor crime . I didn't report it, I mean i didn't want to be a snitch , feel me? It wasn't anything major , just a little homicide. Victimless crime really. Scumbag was a rival of some friends I was forced to help sell drugs with . I needed the cash because , well times were tough. I only helped dispose of the murder weapon. I made sure to wipe it down first, didn't want to contaminate any bodies of water.
                  I really want to be a cop now . Wouldn't it help the LEO community to have a guy like me? I mean who knows what to look for and has that street smartzzz?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    It appears to me , people post here already knowing the answer. They just want to hear something else.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Tombstone-2 View Post
                      It appears to me , people post here already knowing the answer. They just want to hear something else.
                      And normally they don't get the answer they want
                      Since some people need to be told by notes in crayon .......Don't PM me with without prior permission. If you can't discuss the situation in the open forum ----it must not be that important

                      My new word for the day is FOCUS, when someone irritates you tell them to FOCUS

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I can totally understand why anyone wouldn't believe what I had to say, nor am I asking anyone to. I just felt like some background was needed. I do believe I have good moral beliefs, I do believe I am a good person, and I do believe I would do great as a CO or LEO. I also know none of what I believe matters. I know that getting into what I did with my so called family, however minor my role was, was very illegal, but I also had to put food on the table and not just for myself. I suppose I could have just shortened that story down to just a few sentences, so I'll try again here.

                        The facts are that I did pay this man's cash out to people four or five times. As I mentioned, these weren't very savory people. They were the bottom feeders of the town, just about everyone of them was scummier than the last. The families there weren't. They were just looking to get some food. There wasn't any reason for them to be subject to these belligerent idiot's demanding their money and making a scene. It wasn't anything new to me, but there were kids there just about every hour of the day. No reason for them to be around these type of people for no good reason. I know this doesn't make it any less illegal and it doesn't make me any less ashamed, but that's the way I saw the situation. As for the withholding information on the polygraph, or lying on the polygraph, however you would like to put it(as far as I'm concerned it's one and the same) I fully admit 100% to it. No way around that. It was just flat out stupid. I guess I was just thinking too hard about it. I suppose I figured they would think my experiences have turned me into some hyper sexual creep.

                        I've posted my situation on a couple other forums as well and some people are telling me to just find a department that doesn't do polygraphs...but that isn't really the problem as I intend to be up front about that with any interview process in the future. The real problem is with the gambling situation, but it was either do it or potentially not have an income for a time and it's not as if I had any family to rely on for any kind of support. This was about 3 or 4 years ago. Given those, will it really be as dreadful of a time as some make it out to be? Do I really have a snowballs chance in hell? I have plenty of people that could vouch for my character and work ethic. Some being military if that makes a difference.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Jscott1401 View Post
                          I can totally understand why anyone wouldn't believe what I had to say, nor am I asking anyone to. I just felt like some background was needed. I do believe I have good moral beliefs, I do believe I am a good person, and I do believe I would do great as a CO or LEO. I also know none of what I believe matters. I know that getting into what I did with my so called family, however minor my role was, was very illegal, but I also had to put food on the table and not just for myself. I suppose I could have just shortened that story down to just a few sentences, so I'll try again here.

                          The facts are that I did pay this man's cash out to people four or five times. As I mentioned, these weren't very savory people. They were the bottom feeders of the town, just about everyone of them was scummier than the last. The families there weren't. They were just looking to get some food. There wasn't any reason for them to be subject to these belligerent idiot's demanding their money and making a scene. It wasn't anything new to me, but there were kids there just about every hour of the day. No reason for them to be around these type of people for no good reason. I know this doesn't make it any less illegal and it doesn't make me any less ashamed, but that's the way I saw the situation. As for the withholding information on the polygraph, or lying on the polygraph, however you would like to put it(as far as I'm concerned it's one and the same) I fully admit 100% to it. No way around that. It was just flat out stupid. I guess I was just thinking too hard about it. I suppose I figured they would think my experiences have turned me into some hyper sexual creep.

                          I've posted my situation on a couple other forums as well and some people are telling me to just find a department that doesn't do polygraphs...but that isn't really the problem as I intend to be up front about that with any interview process in the future. The real problem is with the gambling situation, but it was either do it or potentially not have an income for a time and it's not as if I had any family to rely on for any kind of support. This was about 3 or 4 years ago. Given those, will it really be as dreadful of a time as some make it out to be? Do I really have a snowballs chance in hell? I have plenty of people that could vouch for my character and work ethic. Some being military if that makes a difference.
                          Fortunately for you, nobody on this forum that responded negatively will be making the decision on your employment. Throw your applications in and let the processes run their course.
                          "Your application is under review."

                          Comment

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