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  • Viking Jokes

    I sure hope we have some vikings fans in here.


    > > The Minnesota Vikings 2001 schedule and changes:
    >
    > > September 15 Shiloh Junior High School
    > > September 22 Cub Scout Troop #101
    > > September 29 St. Paul Blind Academy
    > > October 6 Spanish American War Vets
    > > October 13 Crippled Children's Home
    > > October 20 Elgin Mental Hospital
    > > October 27 Girl Scout Troop #353
    > > November 3 OH Venereal Disease Clinic
    > > November 10 Lakewood Boys Choir
    > > November 17 Koren Amputees Special
    > > Monday Night Game
    > > December 9 Brecksville Girls Club
    > >
    > >
    > > ** Rule Changes From Last Year **
    > >
    > > When playing polio patients, the Vikings must not disconnect knee
    > > braces.
    > >
    > > When playing the Blind Academy, the Vikings must not hide the
    football
    > > under
    > > their jerseys.
    > >
    > > A touchdown (this is when the ball is carried over the goal line
    for all
    > > you Viking fans that have never seen this) is still worth 6 points.
    > >
    > > The Vikings will be allowed 20 men on the field at all times.
    > >
    > > The Vikings will be allowed to substitute with band members at any
    time.
    > >
    > > The Vikings will be awarded 10 time-outs as opposed to 3 for the
    > > opposing team.
    > >
    > > The Vikings will be awarded a first down with each gain of three
    yards
    > > or more.
    > >
    > >
    > > ** Name Change **
    > >
    > > The Minnesota Vikings will be changed to the "Minnesota Tampons" as
    they
    > > are only good for one period and have no second string.
    > >
    > > ** Coaching Changes **
    > >
    > > Green will be replaced by Monica Lewinsky. She will no doubt blow a
    few,
    > > but she certainly won't choke on the big ones!!!!!
    >

    YOUR MINNESOTA VIKINGS

    Q. What's the difference between the Vikings & the Taliban?
    A. The Taliban has a running game

    Q. How do the Vikings count to 10?
    A. 0-1, 0-2, 0-3, 0-4, 0-5, 0-6, 0-7, 0-8, 0-9, 0-10

    Q. What do the Vikings & Billy Graham have in common?
    A. They both can make 60,000 people stand up & yell "Jesus Christ" !

    Q. How do you keep a Viking out of your yard?
    A. Put up goal posts

    Q. Where do you go in Minneapolis in case of a tornado?
    A. To the Metrodome - there's never a touchdown there!

    Q. What do you call a Viking with a SuperBowl ring?
    A. A thief

    Q. Why doesn't St. Paul have a professional football team?
    A. Because then Minneapolis would want one

    Q. Why was Dennis Green upset when the Vikings playbook was stolen?
    A. Because he hadn't finished coloring it.

    Q. What's the difference between the Vikings and a dollar bill?
    A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar

    Q. How many Vikings does it take to win a Superbowl?
    A. Nobody knows and we may never find out!

    Q. What do you call 47 people sitting around a TV watching the
    SuperBowl?
    A. The Minnesota Vikings

    Q. What do the Vikings and opossums have in common?
    A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road

    Q. How can you tell when the Vikings are going to run the football?
    A. The back leaves the huddle with tears in his eyes.

  • #2
    You (*&^T&*( [email protected]#$#@.... @#$w kiss$#&%..... I hope you got all that!
    ~Wise men stand behind me, Brave men stand beside me, only Fools stand against me!~

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    • #3
      Deleted.(I should have read the list first!)
      Extremism in the pursuit of liberty is no vice. Barry Goldwater

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